Tears for your Long Lost Boss
by AllYourLittleThings
Summary: Pepper is pregnant and Tony doesn't know it. And when he finds out everythings perfect until the accident changes everything. Now COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

Tony sighed as he arrived home after being a week away at S.H.I.E.L.D. for training with the avengers.

"It´s nice to see you sir." Said Jarvis

"Hello J. Is Pepper home?" Tony said as he went upstairs to change to something more comfortable.

"Im afraid she isn't sir, and before you ask she told me not to let you know her location."

"Right." He said. _Why doesn't pepper want to see me? Is she mad at me? Geez Tony what have you done now. Damn Im tired. _

"Jarvis start security protocol 4D5T Im gonna take a nap" And with that Tony changed into a pair of black shorts and red tank top and drifted to sleep in the mansion's master bedroom.

Pepper had just opened the gate to the mansion when she saw his red Ascari KZ1R parked in the garage._Oh my God Tony is here! What am I going to tell him?! I hope he hasn't turned on the TV or read the newspaper, it has to be me who tells him. _ "Tony?" Pepper said. "Jarvis where's Tony?" "He's sleeping at your bedroom . I would let him get some rest." Pepper went upstairs and when he saw Tony sleeping so peacefully she couldn't help but smile, he is so perfect she changed to a pair of shorts and one of his AC/DC shirts and joined him in bed. She put her arms around him and almost instantly he pulls her closer, she rests her head on his chest right next to the arc reactor and falls asleep to the sound of his heartbeat. A few hours later, Tony woke up and when he smelled her vanilla scent he realized she was sleeping next to him , so he kissed her forhead lightly and started rubbing circles in her back. "Hey" he heard her say as she shifted slowly to kiss him. "I've missed you" "I've missed you too, a lot." He said as she snuggled up closer to him. "So what's up Pep? Anything new?" "No, why do you ask?" _Oh my God, he knows. _


	2. Chapter 2

"No, why do you ask?" _Oh My God, he knows._

"Um… I don't know our last argument was about me never paying attention to you, so I thought this was a good way of doing it." Tony said in an incredibly calm voice.

"Right, sorry. And nothing happened while you were training" Pepper said. _I have to tell him before I start showing, but how? At least we are already engaged, so my parents wont freak out. _"Actually Tony there's somethi-"

She was interrupted by Tony's light snores and she smiled and placed a kiss on his left cheek before going to the kitchen.

"Jarvis, I need you to make some reservations so Tony can meet my parents."

"I'm guessing you would like to have the best suite in the most expensive hotel in West Palm Beach?"

"Actually Jarvis I think we might stay at my parent's place."

"Alright Miss Potts, you and can leave on Friday the 17th"

"Thanks Jarvis, Oh and please don't say anything to Tony about this." After Jarvis agreed, Pepper watched The Walking Dead on TV and as she was watching it, she placed her hands on her now flat belly. About an hour later, Tony's phone started ringing so she answered.

"Stark, we need you at Providence, there has been an attack, the rest of the Avengers are on their way, except for Thor of course" said Director Fury.

"Hey Director , im sorry this is Pepper, Tony is sleeping but I'll tell him." Said Pepper. _Oh crap, Tony won't make it on time._

"Im sorry Miss Potts but I need to talk to Stark." Said Fury in a serious tone. Just as he was finishing his sentence a sleepy looking Tony started coming down the stairs.

"Yeah, he's here. Let me put him on"Pepper gave the phone to Tony who had a do-i-look-like-i-want-to-talk-to-someone look and sat down on the couch in front of Pepper as he took the phonw out of her hand.

"Who the hell is this? I might be Ironman but I need to rest you know." Tony said adding a sarcastic note at the end. "Wait, right now? I just arrived from the most boring training of all time, didn't you get tired of seeing me because I got tired of seeing you" At this Pepper rolled her eyes and let out a little giggle. "Urgh, fine. I'll be right there." And he hung up.

Tony walked over to Pepper and gave her a kiss on her forehead. "They want me to go to Providence. There has been an attack" He said as she sighed.

"Okay, you should get leaving you know, people lives are in danger."Pepper said. _I sometimes wish you weren't Ironman_. When Tony saw the sad look she was trying to hide, he sat on the couch and moved her so that she was sitting in his lap. Pepper threw her arms around Tony's neck and said "Please be safe, I don't know what I would do without you"

"I'll be okay. And ill be back for dinner, okay?" Tony said as he stroked Pepper's back. After changing into a pair of blue adidas pants and a tight red under armour shirt, Tony jumped off Stark tower and said "send it Jarvis" as his ironman suit arrived just in time before he crashed to the floor.

30 Minutes later, when he arrived at Providence he saw Steve cornered by 10 robot-looking monsters and decided to help him out. "Close call, Capsicle?"

"Shut up." Steve murmured under his breath as Tony laughed.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the reviews! You guys rock!**

Tony was being attacked by at least 12 robots that were a mixture between a bat and a mantis, so they were really creepy, but of course 12 were nothing to Tony's powerful repulsors, so he killed them almost instantly."Did you really need me here for this? I mean I think you guys could handle yourselves pretty well without me" he said through the microphone that connected every Anvenger, designed by Tony of course.

"We're a team Stark." Natasha said as she shot a robot. "Now can you please focus and kill these things faster so we can get home early?" Tony was starting to get annoyed, didn't they know he had just arrived from a meeting with Stark Industries's manager. "You know Romanoff, youre not the only one who's tired here. I have just arrived from a meeting with the most boring old men I have ever seen in my whole life so you can just go an-"

"Knock it off you two, Stark do you know what's powering these things?" interrupted Steve. Geez these guys need to give me a break, why do they want me to do anything. Oh wait im Tony Stark that's why. "Jarvis find the power source"

"Already on it, sir" responded the AI. Tony was being chased by a lot of robots and one shot him with one of their powerful laser bullets that were coming out of their front legs. "Damn it." Tony murmured, the laser had gone through the titanium ironman suit and had hit Tony in his left shoulder. "You okay?" Hawkeye said. "Im fine. Jarvis, you got it?"

"The robot's power source seems to be coming from something glowing and of medium size. Im putting the objects location in your map, sir." Just as he finished, Tony saw the red dot appear in front of his eyes. "Guys I know where it is, I may need someone's help." What the hell is wrong with me? Im asking for help,he thought. "I'll go with you" Agent Romanoff said through the microphone, send me the objects location.

"Sir, your blood pressure has dropped are you okay?" Jarvis asked. If someone asks me again if im okay I will punch them in the face. Since when do they care so much about me? Thought Tony as he flew to the building in which the power source was hidden.

When he arrived, Romanoff was already looking for the object, but when she realized Tony was bleeding she stopped and looked at him with a little concerned in her eyes "You're bleeding Stark" she said. "Thank you Miss Obvious, now can we look for this damn thing?" Natasha rolled her eyes as Tony went to the next floor. "Jarvis, run a scan on the building and tell me in which floor I can find it." Said Tony just as he arrived to the fifth floor, but as he turned around the corner he saw at least 5 guards? Hold on what the hell Is that? They're not robots, but they seem to be half-fish men. Pff piece of cake, he ran towards them and started attacking them with his repulsors. "Jarvis you got it? I got a little company over here."

"Im afraid you are in front of it sir, those creatures are guarding it." It said. "Agent I may need your help here." Come on Tony, asking for help again? " Im on my way" she responded as Tony almost got hit right where the Mantis or whatever the hell those things were had hit him. He managed to kill 2 by the time Natasha arrived.

"Come and join the party" he said as a fish threw his scepter at Tony and missed him by less than an inch. Youre paying for that, nemo he thought as he shot him and with that they were done, both heroes ran towards the glowing object that was incredibly small. But in the second Stark touched it, a hole opened and it fell the 5 floors and at least 2 meters underground. By that time, the rest of the Avengers had found their way to the building and were killing waves of robots that were attempting to kill them. "Um guys, I don't want to put pressure on you, but these things keep coming, apparently they're creating themselves with anything they find, you know cars and stuff" Steve said as he blocked a laser beam.

" Jarvis, how do I dismantle the object?" Tony asked to his AI , "Is it some type of bomb?" he said as he heard a huge roar from the hulk.

"Im afraid it's a nuclear bomb,it will be triggered if it is managed too roughly sir. Do you want me to explain you the procedures on how to dismantle one?" Tony chuckled a little at his AI's comment "Jarvis, youre forgetting I used to make weapons for usa's army… and of course some terrorists which I knew nothing about" He said as memories of when he was kidnapped flew through his mind. "Well guys I have some bad news, I cant take it out without triggering it, Im gonna need someone to get in there and do exactly as I say" Just as he finished everyone turned to Black Widow, who just sighed and nodded her head" All right, BRAVE heroes ill do it" she said emphazising the word brave to make the men feel bad, but they didn't.

"Okay now get in there and look for an opening in the object ,t here has to be one. Tell me when you've found it" Tony said as he helped Steve with some robots.

"Found it, do you want me to open it?" Natasha shouted. " No I just wanted you to know how pretty it is." Tony replied full of sarcasm, he was getting all mean, well more than usual because his shoulder hurted and he was losing a lot of blood. " You should see two blue wires , a red one and a black one. Cut the black one" He explained as he got hit again, but this time it didn't pass his armour, thankfully. "Umm Stark I only see 3 red ones and a blue one." Natasha said with what Tony guessed was fear in her voice. Of course he was wrong because she never got scared. " Let me think for a second" This is impossible he said as he got inside the building and sat in a half-burned chair, suddenly the solution came to his head. "Cut them all!" He screamed at her. "But Stark wont that cause for the bom-" Natasha said as she poked her head out of the hole. "Im sorry, but who's the expert on weaponry here? I thought that was me but Im probably wrong." He added. "Just do it. Im not wrong". And with that Natasha did as she was told.


	4. Chapter 4

"I think it worked, guys these things are turning off… or whatever robots do" shouted Steve as he came inside the building, followed by Hawkeye and a now human Bruce.

"You see, im never wrong." Tony added looking at Natasha as she rolled her eyes. "Except when it comes to being a nice human being" Tony mimicked her and owned a smack on the head by Hawkeye "Stop being such a little kid, Stark." He said in a serious tone "Like if that were possible" muttered Steve hoping no one had heard him. " At least im not a 100 year old virgin Capsicle" replied Tony. Steve replied something back at him, but Tony wasn't paying attention to him because his shoulder started hurting a lot, then he remembered he was bleeding.

"Damn it" he hissed in pain as he touched his shoulder. "Are you okay Tony? Let me take a look at that" said Bruce as he came closer to him. "Don't. I'll go to the hospital when I get home"

"But you've lost a lot of blood." Bruce said with concern in his eyes. "No I haven't, right Jarvis?"

"Im afraid is right sir, you've lost 22% of your blood, at 30% the chances are you may pass out and if you survive there might be brain damage." _Does that mean I might become a normal person, without my intelligence? Oh crap I need help_ "What's the nearest hospital , Jarvis? And how long will it take me to get there?" Just as he finished asking, he thought about Pepper, how in the world am I going to make it in time for dinner. She's going to be so worried about me.

"The nearest hospital is the Miriam Hospital, sir it will take about 15 minutes to get there flying" The whole team was looking at Tony and Bruce said "You can't fly like this, Tony what If you pass out in the air?" After about 15 seconds of reconsidering his options, Tony had to agree with them. "Jarvis how long will it take on to travel by foot?" After the AI responded it would take about 45 minutes, Tony decided it was better to take his chances and fly.

After the team told Tony they would meet him in the hospital later, Tony left and asked Jarvis to call Pepper.

"Tony, thank God, are you okay?" Pepper asked in a worried tone. Tony sighed and said "Don't freak out, but I kinda got shot by a laser beam and I've lost a lot of blood and I think it's a miracle im flying and talking to you at the same time. Im sorry I wont be able to make it for dinner" How can he apologize for not being able to get to dinner when he is drying? And how can he expect her not to freak out when the most important person in her whole world just told her he might die? What if he never got to meet his son or daughter? "Pepper are you there?" he asked.

"Yeah, but Tony I don't care what you say im taking the jet and im flying over." She said. "Oh and btw, I love you" she finished and then hung up.

When Tony arrived, he asked Jarvis to take the suit off him and he was left in his red under armour shirt and black pants. The shoulder part of his shirt had been ruined and he swore he could see his bone. Damn this hurts, he thought and saw how a bunch of people started whispering when they saw Ironman walking through the front door of the hospital and just as he stepped inside he passed out.

Pepper ran upstairs and started packing a few things she might need if she needs to stay for a while in Providence, she was freaking out and called Rhodey to ask him to prepare Tony's jet for her to leave in a few minutes. After telling Happy she had to go to the airport, she looked at herself in the mirror and her eyes flew instantly to her belly. _Your father will make it, he is the strongest man I know _she thought to herself and left the house.

While she was sitting in the back of the car, she was looking outside the window and realized it was a rainy day, she started thinking about the day she found out she was pregnant.

_Tony had left last night, after one of their sessions of lovemaking of course, she was going to miss him so much, because they usually traveled together, and this was one of those horrible nights in which there was a lot of thunder. After eating a cereal bowl while watching Avatar for the hundredth time, she went upstairs and went to sleep. _

_At 3 in the morning, she started feeling sick and had to go to the toilet to throw up. _"Damn it, this is the third time this week."_ Oh my God. I need to go to a pharmacy right now. _

_Later that night, she was spending the longest minutes in her life as she was waiting for the test results sitting in the toilet. She stared at the white stick she was holding in her hand and when she saw a positive mark, she started laughing and crying at the same time like a crazy person._

"Tony and I are having a baby" _she said to herself as she got up from the toilet and went to her bed. She obviously wasn't able to sleep at all._

" we've arrived" said Happy as she stood next to her open door and was waiting for her to get out of the car. Almost immediately she felt asleep thinking about baby names.

Tony woke up to the sound of someone's voice. "We got almost all of the metal of the ironman suit that had attatched to his skin." The voice said. Metal? Seriously? Is that what the voice thought his suit was made of? "Its actually titanium." Said Tony in a hoarse voice. When the doctor gave him a what-the-hell-is-he-talking-about look, he explained "My suit, it's made of titanium, not any metal."

"Hello , Im Dr. Reedus and please tell me if anything is bothering you, just don't move your arm." After that, Tony just nodded every 3 seconds without listening to the doctor, when was done Tony asked "How long will I have to be here?" "Well yo-" before the doctor finishes, Tony interrupted him "I think I can leave now."

"Actually you've lost a lot of blood,so we are just trying to make sure you don't go into cardiac arrest" He said and left.

After looking around for his personalized iPhone (he had changed all of its functions, and even added a portatile version of Jarvis to it) "Hey J, you up? I'm bored so I challenge you to hack into the hospital's system faster than me"

"Challenge accepted,sir"


	5. Chapter 5

When Pepper arrived to the hospital, she called Tony. "Tony, hey what's your room number?"

"666, funny huh?" he said with a small laugh as Pepper ended the call. When she entered Tony's room, she found him playing with a rubik cube, but as the second she entered the room, his huge brown eyes lighted up and he gave her a charming crooked smile which made Pepper's knees feel like Jelly, then he got up from the bed and gave her a strong hug from which Pepper couldn't break free until she said " I can't breathe Tony", then he let go of her.

"Right." He simply replied. " So how's your shoulder?" "Oh Im fine, nothing to worry about, in fact I don't even know why im still here, I mean im perfectly okay" he said. "This has to be the most boring place ever, after the company's meetings of course." He continued "plus, the food sucks, you have no idea how much I miss dummy's sandwiches"

At this, Pepper giggled and then moved closer to kiss him. When their lips touched Tony knew that the one thing that had kept him alive during all of the dangerous fights he had been to, was his love for this one woman, who could change his old playboy life in less than a year. They broke the kiss after a few minutes, when they both needed air.

A few hours later, Pepper was settled in between Tony's legs and was resting her head against his good shoulder. They were watching Inception, one of Tony's favorite movies. Pepper was starting to fall asleep when a nurse came in and said "Mr. Stark, time to get your bandages changed" as she gave Pepper a jealous look. Of course, who wouldn't give Ironman's fiancée a jealous look, she was the luckiest girl in the world. "You might want to leave the room" the nurse said to Pepper as Tony nodded "Yeah, its not pretty Pep" Tony said.

"I'll be fine. " she said as she stood up from the bed and asked Jarvis to pause the movie. The nurse, who was very beautiful, helped Tony get rid of his shirt (he had refused to wear a hospital gown, so Hawkeye had to run to a store and get him a Nirvana shirt and blue shorts) and it made Pepper really jealous. When the bandages were taken off , Pepper let out a small gasp at the sight of Tony's torax. His ribs were bruised and purple and his shoulder looked horrible, it had at least 15 stitches.

"Told you it wasn't pretty" Tony said as the nurse replaced the new bandages, which made Pepper even more jealous, Tony saw the look she was giving the nurse and he started laughing. When the nurse was gone, Pepper sat down on a chair next to his bed. "Please tell me that was not your jealous look" he said as he motioned for Pepper to come back to bed.

"Im not jealous." Pepper said " And im not laying back on bed, I might hurt you even more." She continued. "Oh come on! You wont hurt me" he said as he pouted his lips in a very adorable way. "Fine " she said as she came back to her spot in between Tony's legs to finish their movie.

Two days later, they were coming back to their house in Malibu. The second they entered, Tony hugged the wall as he said "Home sweet home! I missed you so much my dear house"

"Do you need me to give you and the wall some privacy?" Pepper asked in a playful way. Then she realizes she needed to tell Tony about their baby, before she started showing. "Tony we need to talk."

Uh-oh Tony thought this cant be good, whenever Pepper wants to talk its either because I did something stupid or because she's mad at me, at the same time Pepper went to her office to get the white stick she had hidden in a little brown box. When she entered the room she saw Tony opened a bottle of Gatorade and a huge bag of flaming hot cheetos and then he sat down in the couch.

She went and sat down next to him and started feeling so nervous she barely managed to speak up "Im pregnant" she said as she opened the box to reveal her pregnancy test. Tony almost choked on Gatorade and stared at the test. Oh god this is horrible, Pepper thought "Tony please say something" she said as tears started to form on her eyes. Tony looked at her and said " Are you serious?" he said and when Pepper finally nodded he gave her the biggest smile she had ever seen in his face, then he threw his arms around Pepper and buried his face in the crook of her neck and she buried hers in his shoulder, which hurted Tony but he didn't care. "I might pass out of happiness right now" Tony said as he pulled away from the hug to kiss Pepper.

This was the start of a new world for him.


	6. Chapter 6

**SORRY! Haven't been able of posting a new chapter! Plus this is a short one! D: **

"They were able of killing your creations, doctor. You said not even Tony Stark would know how to stop them. You lied to me" said Justin Hammer who was facing the window of the abandoned building in which their secret lab was. "You said to me that your creations could kill Tony Stark and the avengers"

"I thought he wa-" The scientist started but was stopped when Hammer lifted his right hand for him to stop. The look Hammer had on his face was the scariest thing anyone could see. "You have one last chance. I have a video to record". And with that he turned around and left the building.

Tony had never been a morning person, he would always wake up at 11 am if it wasn't for Pepper. She was always dragging him to meetings and charity events he had to attend. But today was different. He was going to be a father and he still couldn't believe it. He had no idea about what being a parent was going to be like , _how am I going to know if he's on drugs? What if it's a girl? Oh god what am I gonna do. _Tony had been asking all this questions and more to himself and to Pepper, who just smiled and said that he was going to be the best father in the whole world.

Pepper had gone shopping for more decorations for the nursery she and Tony had been painting, even though they did not know whether their baby was going to be a boy or a girl. They had decided to paint it in a light green color and the furniture would be dark chocolate oak. Without noticing she was dragged away in her thoughts when she started remembering when she and Tony had been to Baby's R Us.

_Pepper was looking at a beautiful crib. It was made of oak and it looked very comfy, she started picturing the perfect baby in it. It had to be a boy so that if she had another baby it would be a girl and her big brother would hold her when she broke up with her boyfriend and then he would also kick his ass for breaking her little sister's heart. And he would be just like Tony, he would have his eyes and his hair, but he should have her nose. Suddenly she felt a pair of strong arms swing around her waist and resting on her belly. _

"_Penny for your thoughts?" he asked as he placed a small kiss on her neck. "I was just picturing how our baby would look like." And then she sighed as she turned around in his arms to kiss him softly. _

" _I love you" he said as he took her hand to continue their shopping " and I also love that crib we should get it." He finished as he went to look for someone to help him. _

Pepper wasn't even paying attention to the road until she heard the honk of a huge red trailer and the next thing she heard was a loud crash.


	7. Chapter 7

**Did this one a little longer!Hope you like it! Btw. Im a mean person! lol. Dont hate me.**

As the hours slowly went by, Tony was designing an experiment to look for the annihilation spectum resulting from dark matter collisions in space, his mind constantly drifting back to how perfect his child would was starting to get late and Pepper wasn't coming back from her shopping trip, and he started getting worried but just as he was about to call her, his phone started ringing. Janela's name blinked on the small screen and he chuckled, wondering why would his soon to be mother-in-law was calling him.

"Hello Jane… it okay if I call you Jane,right?" he answered with a smile.

"Tony…", she replied with a strange sounding voice, almost as if she was out of breath. "T-Tony."

"Okay I guess it's not, then I'll keep calling you Janela", he asked, but when he didn't get an answer he stopped working and asked "is something wrong?"

"It's… it's Virginia" she said in a shaky voice.

His heart began beating so fast, that his chest was hurting. He turned his head toward his iron man suits, but then he decided to run upstairs to get his car."What happened, Janela?", he asked, afraid of the answer as he ran to his garage and got into his black Lamborghini Reventon**.**

"She had an accident.", Janela cried. "She… somebody crashed into her car."

Tony's stomach flipped and for a moment he thought that he would surely be sick any minute. An image of Pepper leaving their house earlier flashed in front of his eyes and then disappeared quickly. Would their baby be okay?

"Where… where did they take her?" he asked in an impatient voice as he heard the sound of his car's engine turn on.

"Thousand Oaks. Oh God Tony." she whispered, and he could hear her sob. "I'm on my way.", he told her, throwing the phone back into the seat, not waiting for a reply.

Tony made it to the hospital in less than five minutes, running across the parking lot, he could see Pepper's sister, Sarah and Janela getting out of their car. He met them at the entrance, but didn't bother with any formalities. While Sarah led her mother into the building, Tony sprinted towards the front desk, frantically looking for a nurse.

"Excuse me ?", he called, his voice stricken by panic.

A nurse came into view behind the window surrounding the desk, studying the familiar face in front of her for a moment.

"How can I help you, sir?", she asked.

"My… wi… girlfriend was brought here Potts. Where can I find her?"

Sarah looked up at him, shock playing in her eyes, since Pepper hadn't told her anything to her or her family. She had noticed his little slip up. She knew what he had almost said. She grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly, and Tony knew that this was her way of giving him her approval. He had almost called Pepper his wife and now he didn't even know if he'd ever get the chance to marry her.

"Let me check with the doctors, .", the nurse answered, turning away from them.

He stood there with Pepper's family awkwardly, an arm around Janela , his hand still in Sarah's. Every minute seemed to be an unbearable eternity and the ticking of the clock on the opposite wall became louder and louder, until it almost hurt his ears. Harry appeared in the entrance and Sarah waved him over, giving her father a long hug, comforting both him and herself the best she could.

"How is she?", he asked, he usually strong voice replaced by a weak whisper.

"We haven't heard anything yet.", Tony told him, and the older man squeezed his shoulder.

The nurse walked back towards him, a doctor that couldn't be older than thirty following her. Tony stepped closer, unable to wait another second to hear news about Pepper.

"My name is Doctor Carlson. Are you Miss Potts's family?", the doctor questioned and they all nodded their heads.

"Is she alright?", Tony asked, his voice sounding strangely shaky even to his own ears.

"I'm not allowed to give any details to friends and…"

"He is family.", Harry interrupted the doctor, with an unwavering voice.

"Okay. I took care of Miss Potts when they first brought her in. I'm afraid her injuries are severe and they had to take her up for immediate surgery. She had inner bleedings and a few broken ribs as far as we could tell down here."

Tony could feel the floor moving beneath his feet and he was afraid that he would fall any moment. He couldn't seem to focus on anything the doctor was saying, his mind still going circles around the fact that Pepper - his Pepper- was so badly hurt.

"However, what worried us the most is the injury she has on her head. I can't tell you anything about its severity but I am gonna be honest with you. There was a lot of damage done when the trailer hit her head-on."

"What about the baby?", Tony whispered. "She… she is pregnant." When he finished that sentence he could feel the stares of the Potts family burning his back.

"She was conscious for a short moment when the paramedics got her out of the car and she told them about the pregnancy. Unfortunately, I can't tell you whether the baby is okay. We had to focus on keeping her heart beating, so she'd have a chance to go into surgery. I'm sorry that I can't give you any more information."

"Can we go to her?", Janela asked with a very worried look in her eyes.

"She will still be in the OR at this point, but I will take you upstairs if you'd like."

The doctor took them all up to the second floor where he left them in the waiting area. They sat together for hours, Harry and Sarah taking turns in bringing everybody coffee, which Tony declined every time. He couldn't get the image of Pepper out of his head - the way she had smiled when she had left earlier. How she had turned around in the door frame, her eyes sparkling and her almost invisible baby bump peaking out from under her jacket. If he would lose them today, he wouldn't know how to go on.

A set of sliding doors opened and another doctor emerge through them. He approached them, his face not showing any emotion. They all raised to their feet and Tony threw a quick glance at Pepper's parents who had been holding each other's hands for hours now. They looked as terrified as he felt.

"You are here for Miss Potts , right?", he asked.

Tony nodded, his voice failing him as the doctor introduced himself as Doctor Miller.

"Is she okay now?", Sarah whispered, her voice sounding almost child-like.

"We were able to stabilize her, but her injuries are severe. She has six broken ribs and one of them ruptured her lung. We were able to stop the bleeding there but she is not breathing on her own right now."

Tony's vision swam and he felt a stab into his heart, as he imagined the excruciating pain she must have been in.

"She was bleeding into her stomach as well, but we could stop that too. Unfortunately, her head injuries are causing us trouble. Her cranial bone split slightly and the extreme impact of the blow to her head caused a very dangerous pressure on her brain. We did release that pressure but at this point I cannot tell you if there will be any permanent damage to her brain."

Janela had to take a seat at the overwhelming information and Harry followed her lead, taking the chair next to her. They were both crying - as was Sarah, and Tony was the only one who held his composure, even though - deep inside - he was screaming for he had never felt such heart ache in his life.

"Will she make it?", Sarah asked carefully, wanting to know - but afraid of the answer.

"I am going to be very honest with you.", the doctor told them. "I don't know if she can come through this, but her chances are not good. At this point, only time will tell."

"W-what about our baby?", Tony whispered, and they all held their breath.

He watched the doctor intently and the split second that his eyes left Tony's, almost as if he was embarrassed, was all it took for him to know the answer.

"No.", he whispered, tears finally welling in his eyes. "N-no."

"I am very sorry , but there was nothing we could do for the baby. MissPotts's injuries were too severe. I'm sorry."

Tony wanted to scream, to throw something or hit somebody. He wanted to let out all the anger he was feeling, all the pain and sorrow. Instead, he let Sarah take him into her arms. As she held him, crying softly against his shoulder, he allowed himself what he would usually consider a weakness.  
He cried. Tony cried like he had not done since his father's death. He cried for the child he loved, but would never get to meet and he cried for its mother, who was fighting for her life - her future uncertain. His heart broke for the both of them, but as he stood there, surrounded by Pepper's family, he promised himself that he would fight with her.

"Were you able to hit her car?" Hammer asked to the strange man sitting in across him. He wanted to make Tony suffer and since he created the suit, the only way he could hurt him deeply was by hurting Pepper, the only woman he loves, and now that he found out they were having a baby, he saw an opportunity to hurt Stark even more.

"Of course I was. I crashed her car and then left, as you wanted" the man answered.


	8. Chapter 8

**Another long chapter! Enjoy!**

An hour later, they were told that they could see Pepper- one person at a time and only for a short moment. Nobody questioned the fact that Tony would be the first to see her and he was thankful for Pepper's family to be so understanding towards him. Still, he was scared when a nurse led him to the room in the ICU. He entered the hospital room and froze for a moment.

There she was, looking tiny and fragile in the large bed. She was hooked up to so many machines and tubes, that he could barely recognize her. He stepped closer slowly, tears threatening to fall again as he watched her. Her body was covered up to her stomach with a white bed sheet and he could tell that her upper body was wrapped in thick bandages - probably to support her broken rips. Her arms were bruised and cut, each hand the origin for countless needles.

"Pep…", he whispered hoarsely.

Tony's eyes traveled up to her face and his knees almost buckled. A large bruise covered the right side of her face and a few cuts on her forehead had required stitches. The huge tube providing her with oxygen caused her mouth to twist a little, giving her delicate face an expression of sheer sorrow. A few stray pieces of her gorgeous red hair stuck out from underneath the bandage that was covering her whole skull and Tony felt the urge to push it behind her ear - like he would usually do.

He wanted to reach out for her, but was afraid to hurt her. The rise and fall of her chest seemed so unnatural to him, now that he knew it wasn't Pepper herself that was breathing. Normally, he would enjoy watching her breath in and out slowly while she slept, but today the image was bitter sweet. Yes, he was glad that she was still alive, still fighting - but seeing her like this was almost more than he could take.

His eyes traveled to her stomach and his heart broke into a thousand tiny pieces when he found the small bump gone. Her belly was flat again, every sign of their child erased - only in his memory could he still picture it.

"If you are really careful, you can hold her left hand.", a nurse whispered, startling him. "It isn't injured, just watch out for the IV."

Tony didn't respond, but nodded his head. Slowly, he reached out for her hand, trailing his finger across her soft skin 's hand was so cold that it almost made him shy back. After a moment, though, her took her small hand into his, caressing it with his thumb lovingly. He bent down to kiss her fingertips, choking back his tears.

"Talk to her.", the nurse told him. "We have no idea if she can actually hear anything, but she might. Your voice might help her out of her coma."

She left the room then, knowing that he would need a moment alone with the one he loved. Tony bent down and - ever so gently - nuzzled her cheek. He placed a soft kiss there, lingering as he spoke to her.

"You need to be strong, Pepper.", he whispered. "I need you."

His tears wet her cheek and he wiped them off carefully. Tony remembered the last time he had wiped her tears - they way he had done so often in the past. It had been about six weeks ago, he thought. She had been acting strange and when they had been on their way back home from Providence and that was the night in which his world changed. More of his hot tears trickled onto her cheek and he kissed them away, being very conscious of her injuries.

"Come back to me, darling. I… I love you. Pep… I love you."

He stood by her side for a long moment, just holding her hand and whispering her name. Nothing about her reminded him of the bubbly, happy Pepper that he knew - that they all knew. He couldn't describe what it felt like seeing her like this… so… lifeless.

Soon, the nurse was back, telling him that he would have to leave her now, that she couldn't have visitors for too long right now. As much as he understood, it was painful to leave her behind. To leave her alone in the sterile, unfamiliar hospital room, when he knew how much she needed comfort, love and warmth. Kissing her cheek one last time, he reluctantly pulled away from her.

"I'll be back, sweetheart.", he told her, leaving the room with a heavy heart.

He sat in the waiting area as Pepper's family took turns visiting her, each one of them emerging from the room with tears in their eyes. After hours of sitting in the hospital, he decided to call Rhodey, because he was a close friend that deserved to learn about Pepper's tragic accident. He was also the one person that Tony trusted to inform the public about what had happened. Rhodey would do it with tactfulness and out of friendship, not just to attract the press.

It was way after midnight when Sarah could finally convince her parents that it would be best if she'd take them home. They were exhausted - both emotionally and physically - and decided that Harry would stay with his wife while Sarah would drive back to her own place, where her boys were waiting impatiently for any news about their beloved aunt.

"You should go home and get some sleep too.", Sarah told Tony as they were saying their good-byes.

"I can't, Sarah. I can't leave her here all by herself."

"Okay.", she answered and he was genuinely surprised that she didn't press the issue any further.

"We'll be back in the morning. Try to get some rest,Tony.", she smiled weakly, kissing his cheek.

When he was alone in the eeriness of the dimly lit ICU waiting area, he slumped into the uncomfortable chair, trying to relax his sore back and throbbing head a little. He longed for Pepper's hands to massage his head, the way she always did after a long, tiring day of work. She was the only person in the world that could make his migraines disappear. His cheek tingled, almost as if she was really touching him there and he brought his own hand up to his face, hoping to catch hers there, before the feeling would leave him again.

But as quickly as it had come, the memory of her touch was gone again. He closed his eyes, drifting into that place between sleep and wakefulness, unable to fully relax his mind and body.

" ?", an unfamiliar voice whispered and his eyes shot open immediately.

"Is something wrong?", he asked the nurse, the worry about Pepper numbing his senses.

"I just thought you would like a real cup of coffee, not the horrible stuff from the vending machine. We just made some in the nurse's room."

He managed a weak smile, accepting the steaming mug out of her hands.

"Thank you.", he told her, sipping the hot, soothing beverage.

"We usually don't do this…", she started and he looked up at her questioningly, wondering if she was referring to the coffee. "… but the doctors wont be in to check on patients for another hour or so… so if you'd like to… you know… sit with your… with Miss Potts…"

"I would love too.", he breathed, grateful that he would get to be with her again. "Thank you."

The nurse smiled and took the half-finished cup out of his hands. She led him back into Pepper's room, pointing to a chair in the far corner.

"Take that one.", she instructed. "You'll be more comfortable."  
He thanked her again and she left the room, leaving him alone with Pepper. Tony brought the chair as close to her bed as possible, taking her hand into his immediately. He just stared at her for a long time, trying to find any change that would indicate she might be waking up. When he realized that nothing had changed, he started talking to her again.

"Hello gorgeous.", he smiled. "How are you feeling?", he asked, hoping that she would answer him.

He placed her hand against his cheek, carefully kissing her palm. Maybe it would help her to feel him, to have him really close.

"I miss you a lot, Pepper, I guess it's true what they say about not knowing the value of things until you don't have them. You are the only thing on everybody's mind, you know. We all miss seeing you smile,Pepper."

He placed his head on the edge of her bed, seeking the comfort of her body. Tony brought one hand down to rest on her leg, the other keeping her hand pressed against his face. He continued whispering to her lovingly until finally, he lost the battle against his heavy eyelids.

He was brought out of his restless sleep by the same nurse that had brought him into the room an hour ago and she smiled at him apologetically.

"I'm sorry, Mister Stark. But she will have to get her bandages changed now and the doctor should be in soon to check on her."

"Okay.", he answered, his voice hoarse from crying and from the little sleep he had gotten.

"Her family just arrived. They are waiting outside with and one " she explained.

"Thank you.", he told her again, because he really was thankful for her being so understanding of his need to be with Pepper.

Outside, in the waiting area, he found Pepper's parents and Sarah with her two sons, looking exhausted. He hugged each one of them, biting his lip as he watched Janela's eyes water again. Rhodey and Happy entered the room each carrying some of the small plastic coffee cups. They placed them on the small table equipped with old magazines, dropping a few packs of sugar next to them.

"I'm so sorry,Tony.", Randy spoke up, pulling his friend into a hug.

"Thanks for coming,dude. I really appreciate it. You know Pep does too."

"Any news?", Happy asked.

"Nothing new yet. She made it through the night without any complications, but she wont wake up. Her doctor should be in soon though.", Tony answered.

"It's a good sign though that she got through the first night, right?", Rhodey asked him.

"I hope so… I just wish she'd…"

He was interrupted by a loud beeping sound and a few nurses running past them.

"Code blue! We need a doctor in room 611 immediately. Cardiac arrest! Let's move!"

The color drained from Tony's face as he looked around the room full of people that loved Pepper.

"That's… that's her room.", he whispered in shock.


	9. Chapter 9

"Oh God no. No, no, no…", Sarah cried, as she paced the waiting room, almost frantically.

The team of doctors and nurses had been in Pepper's room for about twenty minutes now and they had not been told anything yet. The words spoken by the nurses earlier rang in Tony's ears and all he could think about was that Pepper's heart - that loving, caring, big heart of hers - might have stopped beating. The thought of her dying, all alone, surrounded only by people that she didn't know, haunted him.

Suddenly, the doctor that had spoken to them yesterday, came into the waiting room. He studied the rather large crowd of people, all eyes on him.

"Are you all family of Miss Pepper?", he asked, addressing the unfamiliar faces.

"Yes.",Pepper's mother and father answered together and he didn't question it.

"Miss Potts's heart stopped beating for a moment and she gave us quite a shock in there. However, her heart rate is up now, beating stronger than before."

They all exhaled, releasing the breath everybody had been holding.

"Will she be okay now?", Austin, Sarah's older son, asked carefully.

"I cannot tell you if she will. The risks are still high. But - and we don't know if this could be an indication that she is coming out of the coma - she moved her fingers just now. I don't want to give you any false hope, because it could just be a reflex. Sometimes it's simply an effect of the defibrillation, but it could also be a good sign."

Tony could hardly process the possibly good news. His mind was going in circles around the fact that Pepper's heart had indeed stopped beating. He envisioned her fragile body jolting off the bed, when the doctors had shocked her. He pictured her, like they showed it in movies, her small frame shaken by the impact of the defibrillator. The doctor's words finally brought him out of those scary thoughts.

"In case she is indeed trying to get past the comatose state, somebody should be in there with her right now. Somebody, whose voice might give her that little push that she needs to actually wake up."

"Darling, you have to go in there.", Janela told him and he nodded, already on his way to the room.

In her room, two nurses were re-adjusting Pepper's IVs and he waited in the doorway until they were done. As soon as they left, Tony walked up to her bed, taking a hold of her hand once again. Nothing about her seemed different and if he was being honest with himself, he had expected a change in her. The fact that she had just fought against death, had not left any obvious traces - the expression on her face and not changed.

"We ran more tests on her, Mister Stark.", Doctor Miller explained, standing at the end of the bed.

Tony looked up at him, silently praying he would get some good news. Anything. Just a glimmer of hope.

"Right now, it looks like there is no severe damage done to her brain. If we can keep her stable she should not suffer from any loss of brain function caused by her head injury. However, the test can't tell us how long it will take her to get past the coma and it is still a possibility that this might be a lasting condition."

"But she could get through it, right?", Tony asked weakly.

"Yes, she certainly can. There is something else though, I'm afraid."

"What?", he asked, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Many patients that suffer from the kind of injury Miss Potts is suffering from, experience post-traumatic amnesia. We can be almost completely sure that she will not remember anything about the actual accident or the events immediately before the crash. It's virtually impossible to figure out how the amnesia might be though."

"What does that mean? I mean… how much could she actually… you know… forget."

"The loss of memory could cover a few days or maybe weeks. In the worst case scenario, Miss Potts could lose the memories of years."

Tony's breath quickened as he grasped her hand a little tighter. If the doctor's speculations would come true, then Pepper might not remember their baby. She might not remember how she had agreed to marry Tony and start a family with him. There was a possibility that she wouldn't be able to recall so many little things that were important in her life.

"Will she still be… you know… my Pepper? I mean… will she be the same person?", Tony asked sadly.

"She will still be able to speak, walk and do everything else, if this is what you are getting at, Mister Stark. You need to understand though, if she will suffer from amnesia than she will most likely have the personality that she can remember. If anything about her has changed in that time span that she might possibly have no memory of, then Miss Potts will not know that. She will go back to being who she used to be."

"So… if she has lost the memory of the… lets say last three months… than she wont remember she was pregnant. Is that what you mean?", overwhelmed by the flood of information concerning Pepper's health.

"Exactly. I know this is a lot to take in, but I think you deserve to be told what you can expect if she wakes up."

"When she wakes up.", Tony corrected him. "Not if. She will. Pepper is going to wake up."

Doctor Miller didn't object because in a way,Tony's belief would maybe help Pepper. Sometimes it was the love and strength of others that made the essential difference, defying all medical rules and scientific explanations. Sometimes the people that stood by their sides, or waited in cold hospital rooms for days or weeks even, had the power to bring patients back from the incomprehensible depths of their unconsciousness.

"I'll leave you alone with her now.", the doctor said, and Tony nodded his head, deep in thought.

He kissed Pepper's forehead where it wasn't cut or bruised, lingering for a long moment.

"You gave us quite a scare, love.", he whispered. "You could make it up to us by opening your eyes, you know."

He stared at her face long and hard, hoping for the slightest hint of a change, when suddenly, he thought he'd seen her eyelids flutter. He blinked, squeezing her hand gently, waiting for her to do it again, but nothing happened.

"Come on, Pep. Come back to me.", he told her, wondering if he had just seen what he wanted to believe was happening.

Another nurse entered the room, checking the monitors that were surrounding Pepper's bed.

"I… I think she just tried to open her eyes.", Tony told her, his heart still racing.

"Continue speaking to her.", the nurse advised. "I will call her doctor."

"Pepper, darling. I'm here, we all are. Open your eyes,Pepper. Come on…", he begged.

Doctor Miller and the nurse entered the room again, immediately checking Pepper for any changes that would indicate her waking up. Tony caressed her hand with his thumb as he continued to whisper to Pepper.

"She moved her fingers!", he exclaimed suddenly.

As soon as he had said the words, Pepper's eyelids fluttered again, this time longer and more obvious.

"Get her parents in here! She needs to see familiar faces if she wakes up.", Doctor Miller instructed.

A moment later Harry and Janela entered the room, taking their place next to the bed. They all stared at her and for a while, nothing happened. Until, suddenly, her small fingers moved in Tony's hand again. He brought it up against his lips, kissing it gently.

"She's waking up!", Janela exclaimed, as Pepper's eyes fluttered yet again. "Wake up, honey."

Finally, Pepper's eyes opened and she blinked a few times, adjusting to the bright lights of the hospital room.

"Oh my God, Pepper.", Tony whispered, tears threatening to fall. "We're all here."

Her eyes darted from person to person frantically and she tried lifting her hand to the tube that had been supporting her breathing. The fear that played in her eyes, was frightening and Tony wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and tell her everything would be okay.

"Calm down, Miss Potts. Do you know where you are?", Doctor Miller asked.

Pepper shook her head slightly, panic clouding over her vision.

"You are in the hospital, Miss Potts. You had an accident."

Her hand reached to her mouth again, but a nurse stopped her.

"You needed a little help breathing, but we will remove the tube now."

The doctor disconnected the tube from the breathing machine and instructed Pepper to cough on a count of three. He slowly removed it from her throat and she coughed, gagging on the rather large device. A nurse brought a cup of water to her mouth, telling Pepper to take a little sip to soothe her sore throat. After a moment, she calmed down, her breathing regulating.

"Why…", she whispered, her voice hoarse and strained.

"You were in a car crash, Pepper.", her mother told her, crying out of relief. "But you'll be okay now."

Pepper noticed how her hand was in Tony's, his thumb drawing patterns on her looked up at him, confused and he smiled at her. He, too, was crying silently and she was shocked to see him like that. Her eyes wandered until they finally fell on her dad.

"Daddy…", she smiled.

"Welcome back, princess.", her father laughed lightly, biting his bottom lip in an attempt to stop it from trembling.

Slowly, she looked back to Tony, confused. She carefully pulled her hand out of his, watching as the smile on his face slowly faded.

"What are you doing here?", she asked.

He looked at her, unsure why she would ask such a thing. Before he could answer. The doctor interrupted them.

"Miss Potts, do you remember what happened to you?", he asked.

Tears gathered in Pepper's eyes as she tried her hardest to remember the accident she had apparently been in. When she couldn't recall anything about it, fear shot through her body.

"I… I don't know.", she cried.

"That's quite alright. Don't worry. What is the last thing you remember?"

She closed her eyes, trying to focus on the many thought swirling in her mind. It was hard to make sense out of it all, with her head throbbing and aching.

"I remember that I was on my way home. And I remember shopping."

"You do?", Tony asked and she shot him a quick look, almost accusingly.

"I was on my way back from shopping my birthday present, which you forgot again.", she continued.

Tony closed his eyes, realizing that she must have lost her memory of the last few birthday had been 3 months ago. If this was how much she had forgotten, then she wouldn't know about their child, or their engagement.

"Can you recall any specific events that day?", Doctor Miller asked, trying to encourage Pepper to regain as much information as possible.

"I… I remember that I wanted you buy a very beautiful but expensive dress.", she answered.

"Miss Potts, tell us more about that. Did you buy the dress?"

Pepper studied them all for a moment, trying to figure out why they didn't know what she was talking mom and Sarah had gone shopping with her, so they should remember it as well, clearly.

"Yes I did.", Pepper whispered.

Tony's mind began racing as he tried to remember when Pepper had worn a new dress. Had it been at the firemen thing? "Do you remember anything else from that night?", the doctor asked, attempting to re-built Pepper's memory around the last event she seemed to be able to remember.

"Someone left me on the roof and never brought my drink back." She said and then looked over to Tony.

His eyes shot wide open and Janela gasped, gripping the edge of the bed. Pepper shot them all a worried look. She couldn't comprehend why they seemed to make such a huge deal out of last night's events.

"What date is today?", Doctor Miller spoke up.

"Uhm… it's the 20th… of August."

Pepper's parents and Tony shared a look with the doctor as realization slowly settled in.

"And what year, Miss Potts?"

Pepper's stomach twisted as the feeling that something wasn't quite right set in. They all looked so shocked and almost frightened, especially Tony. What he was doing there, with her parents, she could not comprehend at all. He was the last person she would expect by her bedside and it really confused and almost angered her to see him standing there.

"It's 2012.", Paula answered.

It was that one number and the way she had answered with such certainty, that made Tony realize that Pepper had lost her memories of the last couple of months.

She had lost her memory of them.


	10. Chapter 10

**You guys are awesome! I hope you will love the way this story is going and well yeah.**

"What's wrong?", Pepper asked quietly, searching her parents' eyes for any kind of reassurance.

"It's okay, honey.", her crying mother answered, doing nothing to make Pepper feel any better.

Her eyes fell on Tony, whose face was pale to the point that it looked almost unnatural. Something about the way he looked at her was different but she couldn't put her finger on it. His eyes were moist and his hands, she noticed, were trembling. To her surprise, her dad reached up to place a hand on Tony's shoulder, patting it at first, then giving it a comforting squeeze. What was going on? Her parents didn't like Tony . They had only met him once when they came to visit her 5 years ago, but after everything she had told them about Tony's behavior as a playboy , they did not enjoy his company.

Why did they seem so close to one another all the sudden? She had never felt so lost in her life. The feeling that everybody else knew something they weren't willing to tell her, was overwhelmingly painful.

"Miss Potts …", the doctor began, taking a deep breath.

No matter how many times he had to deliver bad news to a patient or its family, it never got any easier. This was the hardest part of his job, because he knew him telling his famous patient that she had lost her memory of the last three months of her life, would hurt not only her, but many people in her life as well.

"You suffered from a very severe injury to your head. There was a lot of pressure on your brain that we had to get under control."

Pepper's hand flew up to her head instinctively, feeling the thick material of the bandage. She winced as she touched a cut on her forehead accidentally, dropping her hand back on the bed.

"We managed to release the pressure, but some things are out of our control…"

"What do you mean?", she whispered, searching for her mother's hand.

Tony took a small step away from the bed, realizing that she would no longer want him to comfort her. Of course she wouldn't, he thought, an indescribable pain tucking on his heart. Pepper didn't know the man he had become, he was no longer the cold-hearted guy he used to be, now he wasn't afraid of showing his feelings when he was around her and he didn't care about any other girl that wasn't Pepper, she ruled his whole world. She only knew the person that he once was, the man that could easily dissolve her to tears and didn't seem to care. Tony wasn't anything like that anymore and hadn't been for a very long time now.

But Pepper didn't know that.

"Miss Potts, you are suffering from what we call post-traumatic amnesia."

A tear trickled down her cheek and Tony wanted to reach out and wipe it away. Instead he turned his head away from her, because he couldn't bare to look at the shock and sadness playing in her eyes.

"I lost my memory?", she questioned quietly.

"I'm afraid so. I am very sorry."

She tried to collect her thoughts, but suddenly everything seemed like such a big blur. She couldn't make sense out of anything anymore, only one question on her mind.

"H-how much did I… forget."

Tony looked at the doctor in panic, afraid he would tell her too much. He didn't want anybody to tell Pepper about their relationship and the baby. At some point she would have to know, but he would be the one to tell her. Somehow, he would bring up the courage to tell her everything.

"Today is 25th of November."

"Oh God…", she cried, finally breaking down.

Janela stepped closer, taking Pepper's fragile body into a careful embrace. She held her sobbing child for a long time, her heart breaking from all the heart ache Pepper must have been feeling at this very moment. Harry walked around the bed, taking his daughter's free hand into his, trying to calm her with comforting words.

Tony stood there and watched them. He had never felt so lonely and lost in his whole life. For the first time since they had began their relationship, he didn't feel like a part of her family. She didn't need him and she wouldn't want his support and comfort. Taking a last look at her, he quietly left the hospital room, so she would not see him break down.

Outside he found everybody else still waiting anxiously. He didn't want to talk to anybody, but he knew that they deserved to know as well. Sarah,her husband, Michael, Rhodey and Happy came rushing towards him as soon as he entered the waiting area.

"Did she wake up?", Sarah asked.

"Yes.", he mumbled, cursing himself inwardly for his harsh tone.

He should be thankful that she was still with them, still alive and awake, but the fact that she had no memory of their love for one another overshadowed every sense of joy.

"What's wrong, Tony ? Is she okay?"

"She… she has lost her memory,Sarah.", he told Pepper's older sister.

"W-what does that mean?"

"It means she thinks it's August 20th. It means she cannot remember anything that happened over the past months. She can't remember that we are a couple and she hates me.", he almost yelled.

"Oh darling…", Sarah whispered, pulling him into her arms.

But this time he didn't let her. He pushed her away gently, making his way out into the hallway to get away from everybody for a while. Before he could get into the elevator, Doctor Miller stopped him.

"Mister Stark, I know this is extremely hard on everybody right know, but I need to have a word with you."

Tony nodded his approval and let him talk.

"She will want to know everything that her mind cannot recall and it is important that the people that surround her provide her with this information. Her questions have to be answered and it might help her memory if you provide her with things that could possibly trigger a reaction in her mind. However, you will have to take it very slow, otherwise Miss Potts could go into a sort of shock condition."

"Okay.", Tony told him, wondering how he could possibly take on this task when she probably wouldn't want to spend a minute with him. "What can I do?", he asked anyway.

"Take small steps. Tell her things about the time she has lost. Anything, really. Things about yourself or about her and make sure to be there for her. She will need a strong hand to guide her through this."

"I… I don't know if I can. She doesn't know me well enough to trust me… she only knows the old me."

"She will have to get to know you again, Mister Stark. You will not have to deal with this alone either. Miss Potts will need therapy to cope with this situation and sometimes it can be very helpful for the patient to speak to somebody that has an objective look on things."  
"O-okay… thank you Doctor Miller.", Tony answered, shaking the doctor's hand.

After he was left standing there alone, he finally pushed the button for the elevator. He needed to clear his head and he had to be alone for a while to come to terms with this situation. However, he couldn't even make it into the opening elevator, before he heard Harry's voice calling him. Tony stopped, but didn't turn around.

"Son…", Pepper's father started.

The simple word - one Harry had used many times to address him- made all a difference. It reminded him that he was still part of Pepper's family, that her losing the memory of their love didn't mean he was forgotten. Tony bit the inside of his cheek and turned around to face the older man. In a way, Harry reminded him of his own dad, who had passed away years ago - too early, leaving an empty spot in his heart. They were two very different men, Harry and Howard, but right now, Tony could only see the similarities in their personality. He'd seen that sad, but comforting smile before, that Pepper's dad was giving him now. It was that kind of smile a dad would give his son, trying to tell him that he understood and that it would be okay.

"She wants to see you."

"Really?", Tony asked incredulously.

"Yes. Her mother told her that you have been by her bedside the whole time and she doesn't understand why. I think she deserves to know."

Tony nodded his head absentmindedly, trying to imagine what it would be like to tell Pepper the truth about them. How they were a couple, in love.

"I'll talk to her.", he finally decided. "But, Harry, promise me you wont tell her anything about our baby…", he pleaded.

"I wouldn't and neither would her mother or anyone else for that matter. It is up to you alone when and how you want to tell her."

"Thank you.", he smiled lightly, because as hard as it would be, he wouldn't want anybody but himself to be the one to tell Pepper about the child they had lost.

"Go to her.", Harry encourage him.

Slowly, Tony made his way towards Pepper's room, feeling more nervous than ever. Janela was still in there talking to her daughter quietly, wiping Pepper's tears every now and then. When she saw him, she squeezed Pepper's hand and left them alone. Tony took a seat on the chair by her bed, studying his own hands in his lap.

"Mom told me you were here the whole time.", Pepper began, her voice still a little raspy.

"Yeah.", he smiled up at her weakly.

"Why?", she asked. "I mean… it's very… uhm… nice of you, but I don't understand…"

"Pep…", he started, almost reaching out to grab her hand.

But he remember how she had reacted earlier and he didn't want her to feel uncomfortable. Yet again, Tony felt almost desperate for any kind of contact with her. They had always been so affectionate with each other, that it pained him now, that he couldn't just touch her whenever he pleased.

"… there is something you should know…"

"Yes?", she pressed.

"Things have… changed over the last months. We're… it's different now."

He looked into her pleading eyes and suddenly he didn't care if it'd be awkward to hold her hand. He reached out and took her fingers into his hand. Pepper looked at him confused, but something about the way his eyes bore into hers, made her allow him to do so. Something about the way he held her hand was strange, but not unpleasant. It felt almost as if it was a familiar touch.

"You and I have changed, Pep. A lot."

"How?"

"Well… I am not as big of an ass as I used to be.", he smiled bitterly. "We… we get along pretty good now, Pepper."

"We do?", she asked, having a difficult time believing him.

She couldn't imagine them getting along or being close friends, because he was an egoistic, self-centered prick and she didn't like the way he treated other people. But if they had really changed, then maybe it was possible. As odd as it seemed to Pepper, it couldn't be a bad thing that they didn't fight as much as before, she had always had a crush on him, but she obviously couldn't tell him, since it would only make his ego grow more.

"Yeah… but that's not all, darling."

His thumb had begun to caress her palm and for a moment she wondered how much of a friend he had become over the years that she couldn't recall.

"We are… Pep, this is hard."

"Just tell me.", she begged, getting impatient.

"We are a couple, Pepper. You and I have been together for three months now. You had just agreed on marrying me when the accident occurred"

She gasped, pulling her hand out of his. This couldn't be the truth. He must have been playing some kind of cruel joke on her. There was no way she could have ever fallen in love with the man that she fought with almost every week. Pepper could feel her heart beating faster and she wanted to run, to be alone.

"I… I think I want to be alone,Tony. Would you… I'm sorry.", she cried.

"It's okay, love. I know that this must be hard for you.", He whispered, choking back his tears.

He didn't know what he had expected, but to see the horror in her eyes when he had told her, had broken something deep within him. He stood up and bent down to place a kiss on her forehead. She stiffened under his touch, when he wiped a tear off her cheek. This was not the man she knew. Clearly.

"I love you.", he told her, moving away from her.

When he had almost reached the door, Pepper called his name quietly. He turned to look at her, his own tears now shining in his eyes.

"Promise me you'll make me see what it is that brought us together. Promise me you'll… you'll fight for me,Tony."

He studied her face and realized that this was still his Pepper. She was still the woman he loved so deeply and he wouldn't give up on her now.

"I promise you, Pep. I will fight for us… I promise you that I will fight for what we have."


	11. Chapter 11

**Guys I think three months is too little time for the drama in this story, so Im going to change it to a year okay? Love you!**

Three weeks after her accident, Pepper was finally ready to leave the hospital. Every day, she had learnt more about her forgotten past and by now she had a general idea of what had happened during the last year in her life. She knew that Stark Industries had stopped developing weapons and that he sister had a newborn baby named Steven.  
The only part of her life that she tried to avoid, was Tony. He was there every day but hardly ever alone with her. Pepper obviously didn't feel comfortable to be around him on her own, so she insisted on her mother or other family members and friends to be around. Her reluctance to spend any time with him, nearly broke Tony's heart, but he had promised her that he wouldn't give up on them. He had tried many times to tell her about them, but Pepper would always change the subject, chatting with him about Iron man or their friends.

It shouldn't have come as a surprise when she asked her mother whether she could move in with her now, that she wouldn't have to stay in the hospital any longer. Still, her decision left Tony with the painful feeling of rejection, even though he knew that this was just as hard on her - maybe even harder. He picked her up together with Pepper's mother nonetheless, driving them both to Janela's house.

"You'll be staying for dinner, right?", Janela asked as soon as they pulled into the drive way.

Tony watched Pepper bite her bottom lip nervously in the seat next to him, but when she didn't object he told her that he would love to join them for dinner. Once inside the house, he carried Pepper's belongings into the spare bedroom, wishing it would be their bedroom - in their house. As he walked back into the kitchen, Janela had already started with the preparations for dinner, while Pepper was sitting at the table, studying a photograph of her and her nephews.

"I think I'll take a bath.", she announced, unaware of Tony's presence in the room.

"Do you remember where the bathroom is?", Janela asked carefully.

"I do.", Pepper answered.. "Unless it has changed in the last year.", she added, sounding almost bitter.

"Do you need any help?", Tony asked, startling her.

Pepper looked at him in shock for a moment, before she realized that they were a couple and that it was probably a sweet gesture for him to offer his help. Now, however, it only made her feel uncomfortable.

"T-thanks.", she stammered. "I'll manage."

He turned his gaze away from hers, blushing. Janela sighed, knowing that her daughter and Tony had a long way ahead of them if they were ever going to get back to what they had. As much as she felt for Pepper, she could also understand Tony and was quite impressed by his patience. After her daughter had left the room, Janela patted his back in a comforting gesture and he smiled at her weakly.

"She'll come around.", the older woman reassured him.

Tony nodded his head, wishing he could believe her. But after three long weeks, Pepper still wouldn't allow him a minute alone with her and if things would continue like this, then he might never get a chance with her again. This was his biggest fear.

Upstairs, Pepper was slowly climbing into the hot bathwater. Her body was still sore, even though it was healing and she had trouble finding a way to get into the tub. She wished she would have asked for help after all, but as usual she had assumed she'd be fine on her own. Finally, she slid into the soothing water, her tense muscles relaxing immediately. Pepper thought about Tony's offer to help her and she closed her eyes, recalling the expression of sadness in his eyes when she had told him 'no'.

Over the last few weeks, she had come to the conclusion that he had changed very much. Still, she couldn't let herself go; couldn't bring herself to let him back into her life. The knowledge that he loved her and stood by her side, when she could give nothing in return was painful, yet Pepper couldn't get past her animosity for him. As she lay in the warm bath, she wondered what it would be like if she'd allow him into her life. Would he really be able to make her happy? Had she really been happy with him before the accident?

She had asked her mother and Sarah the same question and to her utter surprise they had told her that Tony was without a doubt the only man that had ever put that particular smile on her face. According to them, Pepper loved him with all her heart. She opened her eyes, not willing to lose herself in those thoughts. Looking around the room, she felt a sense of familiarity, but it didn't feel like home. She longed for her own house, but knew she had sold it in order to move in with Tony. Would his house - their house - feel more like a home than this did, she wondered.

When the water was slowly getting cold, Pepper brought up the strength to get out of the bathtub. A sharp pain shot through the scar across her stomach and she had to take a deep breath, unable to move for a moment. Eventually, she grabbed the robe that she found hanging on the door, wrapping it around herself. Pepper walked into the bedroom and made her way to her suitcases to find a comfortable outfit. When she'd come downstairs, she promised herself, she would talk to him. She would start a conversation with Tony to show him that she was willing to open up.

Ten minutes later she was still struggling with her clothes. Her entire thorax hurt from the still healing ribs that had been broken, after she had finally managed to slip on her short-sleeved turtleneck and pants. The shirt she had chosen had a few buttons in the back that Pepper couldn't reach without wincing in pain and she couldn't seem to put her socks on her feet. It was simply too painful to lean over that far.

"Mom?", she called finally. "Mom, could you come up here?"

It took a couple minutes before she could here a knock on the door.

"Come in."

The door opened only slightly and she could hear his nervous sounding voice.

"Uhm… I'm sorry. It's… it's me.", Tony stammered.

"What are you doing up here?", she asked, sounding harsher than she had intended to.

"I heard you call for Janela but she ran out to get a couple of things for dinner that she was missing. I… well uhm… I thought you might need help."

Pepper looked at him, ready to tell him that she was okay and didn't need anything. Her socks and buttons could wait till her mother got back. But then she decided that she would have to make an effort too, if she wanted to get the forgotten part of her life back.

"I put on this turtleneck but can't button the back of it or put my socks on.", she whispered. "It hurts so much."

"Oh…", Tony breathed, rubbing the back of his neck in a bashful manner. "Do you want me to help you?"

She nodded her head quietly and he walked over to where she was sitting on the bed. Pepper handed him a pair of black socks and he got on his knees in front of her, gently reaching for her left foot and placing it in his lap. Tony didn't dare to look into her eyes and she avoided his gaze as well. She studied the picture on the nightstand, biting her lip. When he had pulled on both socks, he placed her feet back on the floor and stood up.

"Should I… button your shirt too?"

"If you don't mind.", Pepper whispered, blushing furiously.

She stood up so he'd be able to reach the buttons, when suddenly another sharp pain shot through her abdomen.

"Ow…", she winced, grabbing her stomach.

Fear clouded his vision and without thinking, Tony reached out to steady her body. He placed his hands on her waist as she crouched down slightly, her body twisting in pain involuntarily. Pepper fell against his chest,right next to the arc reactor that was showing a little because he kept the last two buttons of his blue shirt open, needing the support so she wouldn't fall to her knees.

"Sweetheart are you okay?"

She didn't answer him at first. Instead she brought a hand up to grab his shirt, clinging to it for dear life.

"Pepper… darling."

"It's just… ow…", she cried. "It's the scar… it hurts so bad sometimes."

"What can I do?", he asked, feeling her tears wetting his shirt.

Her whole body quivered as another wave of pain hit her. She let herself fall into his arms, unable to hold herself up any longer.

"It'll pass.", she sniffed and he brought her a little closer to his own body.

Eventually, Tony could feel her tense body relax a bit and he figured that the pain must be dying down slowly. Out of habit, his hand had started to move up and down her back, because he knew this was something that always calmed her. He didn't know how many minutes had gone by, but as long as she wouldn't let go, he wouldn't either. Tony had brought his head down to rest upon hers and he breathed the familiar scent of her hair. It took him a while to realize that she was still crying.

"Does it still hurt?", he asked quietly.

"N-no.", Pepper sniffed.

"Are you… okay then?"

She nodded her head against his chest, but didn't let go of him. Pepper didn't stop crying either, which began to worry him. If she wasn't in any physical pain any longer, then there must have been another reason for her tears.

"You can talk to me.", he told her.

"I am so sorry.", Pepper sobbed. "I'm so sorry, Tony."

He brought a hand to each side of her face, gently forcing her to look up at him. Her eyes were red and swollen and her bottom lip was trembling. His body fought the almost impossible task of resisting those lips and it took him a moment to collect his thoughts.

"What are you sorry for?"

"I'm so sorry that I can't remember, Tony.", she sniveled. "I wish I could remember… us."

"Oh Pep…", he sighed, pulling her back into his embrace.

As much as it hurt him to see her break down like this, he couldn't help but think that this could be a step into the right direction. Apparently, he wasn't the only one that wanted her to remember their love for one another. If Pepper wanted it too, maybe they did have a chance. If she was willing to let him be the one to hold her when she felt like crying, then maybe they weren't lost after all.

"It's gonna be okay, love.", he reassured her. "We'll be okay, believe me."

Pepper finally looked up at him, for the first time since her accident allowing herself to really study his face. He had changed, but he had not lost his somewhat boyish charm. His features had softened, making him look a lot more amiable than she remembered.

For the shortest of moments, her mind turned blank, and she reached up to touch his face. Tony closed his eyes, trying not to press his body against hers or to bring his lips upon hers. Her fingers felt as soft as ever, reminding him again how much he loved her.

"I'm back.", Janela's voice rang through the house suddenly.

Pepper left his embrace hastily, both of their cheeks turning a similar shade of crimson.


	12. Chapter 12

**Guys Im so sorry I havent been able of writing! I had midterms and they were awful D: But theyre over now YAY . Don't forget to Review and tell me any suggestions you might have! -AllYourLittleThings**

The dinner was spent in awkward silence and Janela was left wondering how long it would be like this. She had no idea what had happened between Tony and her daughter earlier, but she could feel that they were both working hard on avoiding any kind of eye contact. Pepper played with the food on her plate, pushing it around absentmindedly, almost like a child that didn't want to eat its vegetables.

"You need to eat.", Janela reminded her and Pepper rolled her eyes, popping a piece of carrot into her mouth.

They continued to eat in silence and when Pepper's plate was half empty, she pushed it away, wiping her mouth with a napkin.

"Virginia…", her mom started.

"I know, I know. But I cannot eat another bite. It was great though, mom. Thank you."

Janela chose not to say anything, her eyes wandering between her daughter and Tony, who was looking rather handsome tonight in his ripped jeans and black stripped shirt. The tension between the two was so obvious, covering them like a thick, heavy blanket. Again, she wondered if something had happened that she didn't know of, for them to be so uncomfortable around the other. It was understandable for Pepper to have a certain reluctance, even though Janela wished her daughter would be more open towards the man that loved her more than his own life. But it was him that she didn't quite understand right now. Tony had tried so hard to talk to Pepper ever since she had woken up, but now, as they sat there together, he didn't utter a single word.

"Do you have any plans for tomorrow?", Janela asked suddenly, directing her question at Tony, who was just finishing his wine.

"Uhm… no, not really.", he answered, hesitating a bit.

"I have a couple of doctor's appointments tomorrow, so I was hoping you'd stay with Virginia while I am gone."

Pepper's head shot up and she looked at her mother in shock. This was the first time she'd mentioned anything about a doctor's appointment and she hated to be put on the spot like this. She might have lost her memory and she might still be a little too weak to be on her own for a longer period of time, but she certainly wasn't helpless. Her mother was making decisions over her head and Pepper didn't appreciate it. Tony, however, seemed more than eager to agree.

"That's no problem at all, Jane. When do you want me to be here?"

"If you could come by at around eleven tomorrow morning, that would be great." Janela answered giving him a warm smile.

Pepper studied the two, growing more and more angry. They were talking about her as if she was a child that needed to be babysat for a few hours. She almost wanted to jump up and tell them that she was still there, that she could hear them and didn't appreciate the way they made plans about how she would have to spend her day.

"I hope you don't mind, sweetheart.", Tony spoke suddenly.

She looked at him and thought she saw a sparkle in his eyes, almost as if he was excited. He smiled at her, tilting his head just the slightest bit and she began twisted her fingers nervously under the table.

"I… I don't mind.", Pepper stuttered finally, earning a gorgeous, bright smile from Tony .

In fact, she did mind. Not because she would be spending time with him, but because she would be spending time with just him. Alone with Tony.

She watched her mother and Tony chat for a while as her eyelids began getting heavy. It was barely eight o'clock in the evening, but the impact of her still healing injuries and all the emotional stress were taking their toll on Pepper. She rested her head in her hand, trying to follow the conversation. His large hand came to rest on her shoulder and she bit the inside of her cheek. It was still a challenge for her to allow him any kind of physical contact.

"You should get some sleep.", he told her, smiling.

"Yeah… I think I'll actually go to bed now.", Pepper answered, slowly getting out of her chair.

Tony stood up with her, both of them fully aware of Janela's curious gaze. He pulled Pepper's chair back and she steadied herself for a moment, a slight pain numbing her senses for a split second. His hand came down on her back immediately, but Pepper shrugged him off, telling him that she was fine. She walked around the table to place a kiss on her mother's cheek and tell her good night.

"Good night, honey.", Janela smiled as she returned the kiss.

Pepper came back towards Tony, standing in front of him awkwardly. Janela excused herself, telling them she would need to do the dishes. She grabbed their plates and silver wear and left the dining room quickly.

"Do you need any help? I mean… with the… uhm… shirt. You know…"

Pepper caught herself actually enjoying him being so flustered, since she wasn't used to seeing her billionaire boss so nervous. She suppressed a grin and shook her head.

"I think I'll be okay. If not, I'll just ask my mom."

"Okay.", Tony smiled, feeling an odd mixture of relief and disappointment. "Good night, darling."

He leaned in to place a lingering kiss on her forehead and she let him. Then he left the house without another word to go back to the place that he considered their home. Yet, he had to go alone. Pepper watched until the car pulled out of the driveway before she went upstairs into her bedroom. She struggled with her shirt but was determined to do this on her own. Finally, after what seemed like forever, she had changed into her pajamas and crawled under the covers. Her body relaxed in the comfortable bed and she felt exhausted but not exactly tired any longer. The small lamp on her bedside table provided a soft light making the room look welcoming and homey, but Pepper still felt somewhat strange to sleep in this bed, in a house that wasn't hers.

She placed her hand over the still sore spot on her stomach, rubbing it lightly to ease the pain. She couldn't describe the strange feeling she had somewhere deep in her belly. It didn't really hurt, but it felt uncomfortable and weird. Almost as if something in there didn't belong.

Of course she didn't know that something that did belong, wasn't in there any longer.

Across town,after changing into a pair of red shorts and no shirt, Tony sat in bed as well, his back against the headrest. He held an ultrasound picture of their child, staring at the tiny spot that was meant to be his son or daughter. He traced a finger across the image carefully, before dropping it into his lap. His head turned slowly, his eyes falling to the unoccupied spot next to him. Her pillow felt cold against his palm as he tried to smooth the wrinkles in the soft material. He slid down and placed his head on her side of the bed, emptiness developing within him once again.

The ultrasound picture fell onto the bed and he studied it for the millionth time. Someday - someday very soon - he would have to tell Pepper about their child. Because she deserved to know and because he needed her to mourn with him. It was impossibly difficult to keep up a façade towards her, when he was screaming on the inside. Just a few days ago, he had given away all the things they had already bought for the baby. Every box was tucked away safely in Sarah's basement - far away from where Pepper could spot it. Far away from where he would have to see it too. Now, the room that was meant to be a nursery looked like just another ordinary room, that had been cleaned out for renovation.

Tony closed his eyes, because as early as it might have been, the lack of sleep over the last few weeks had left him incredibly exhausted. Just like all the other nights, he could see Pepper as soon as his eyelids had fallen. It was the same image every time. In his mind, she turned in the doorframe, giving him her brightest smile, the tiny baby bump protruding from under her jacket. Tony could understand why it would be this picture he would see continuously, for it had been the last time he had seen Pepper before the accident. But still, it made him crazy. Every night he fought an inner battle with himself. If he would open his eyes now, he'd be free from the haunting image of her - still healthy, happy and pregnant. However, he was also clinging to that particular picture that kept replaying in his mind.

The shrill, unexpected sound of Jarvis's voice telling him that his cell phone was ringing made him wake up and he sat up in bed. Tony didn't recognize the number, even though it seemed somewhat familiar.

"Hello?", he answered.

"H-hi.", a tiny voice whispered and his heart rate increased immediately. "It's me."

"Pepper.", he breathed. "I-I didn't recognize your number." He said as he started tapping his fingers on his arc reactor, already making a list of reasons as to why Pepper was calling him at this hour.

"It's my mom's house phone.", she explained. "Did I wake you?"

"No, sweetheart. Don't worry about it, I wasn't sleeping. Is everything okay?"

She was silent on the other end of the line for a moment, because she simply hadn't prepared herself for what to say. Pepper had picked up the phone in a spur of the moment decision, because she hadn't been able to get him out of her mind after he had left. Now, that she had called, she cursed herself inwardly for doing so.

"Pepper?"

"I'm… nothing's wrong. I'm fine.", she stammered.

"Good.", Tony answered, relaxing a little bit.

He knew that something had to be the matter though, for her to call him. As he waited for her to talk again, Tony found himself enjoying the soothing sound of her breathing. It was a gift he had never really appreciated before - something he'd always just taken for granted. But almost losing her put everything into a new perspective. Now, the sound of her exhaling nervously was enough to make him happy.

"I didn't even really say good night to you earlier. I'm sorry.", Pepper said suddenly.

"Oh, Pep… you don't have to apologize.", he smiled, sensing that this wasn't really why she had called.

"Uhm… there is something I wanted to ask you…"

"Yes?"

"I was wondering if you would show me the house tomorrow. You know… our place."

He noticed how hesitant she was about calling their house 'our place', but chose to ignore it, because he understood. He didn't expect Pepper to feel comfortable with something she didn't know, but it made him happy to know that she was curious and willing to get to know another part of their life as a couple.

"Of course, Pep. I would love to."

"O-okay. Thank you, Tony."

Their conversation drifted into a long silence, neither of them knowing what else to say, even though there would have been so many things to talk about. She tried to stifle a yawn and he chuckled quietly.

"Get some sleep, darling. You need your rest."

"I keep forgetting how good you got to know me" she answered with a small laugh.

They said their good byes to each other, but oddly enough neither one of them was quite ready to end the call. They weren't having a conversation, for the few words they had exchange couldn't really be described as one. Still, to know that Pepper was still on the other end of the line, was all it really took for Tony to be content right there and then.

"Good night.", she whispered again.

"Good night, darling.", Tony answered.

He stopped briefly, trying to choose every word wisely. In the end he spoke them from that deep, hidden place within his heart, because she deserved nothing less than that.

"I love you, Pepper. I… I just want you to know that."

"I do.", she whispered. "I do know that."

She ended the call quickly, but Tony wasn't able to sleep again, so he decided to go to his workshop.

"Wake up boys, daddy's home" he said as he clapped twice and all the lights turned on.

"Sir, don't you think its too early for you to start working?" Jarvis said with what Tony thought was a little concern.

"It's never to early, J" Tony answered and as he was walking an idea occurred to him, he wanted to use iron man as a weapon for the first time since he created it. He wanted revenge from the son of a bitch who murdered his son or daughter ( he secretly wanted a daughter) "Hey J, were the recordings from 's car saved? You know the ones from the day of the accident?" Tony asked as he sat down in front of one of his many monitors. "Theres something I need to see"

"They were, sir. Im downloading them right now" After seconds, the download was complete and Tony was analizing the tape, hoping to see the trailer's plates. "Hey Jarvis, could you tell me who owns the vehicle with the next plates… G8-PDGT?" he said, already planning all the things he would do to the driver.

" It's a Velmer TDR300 model and it is owned by a man called Jonathan Hanks" Jarvis answered.

"I need you to get me all the info you have in him" Tony answered with determination plastered all over his face.

**Do you guys want the fic to continue as romantic or would you like Tony killing people and stuff? Answers on reviews! thanks :D**


	13. Chapter 13

"Good morning.", she smiled, as she climbed into the passenger seat of Tony's car.

"Good morning, sweetheart."

Just as he had promised Janela the day before, Tony was going to spend a few hours with Pepper and even though it should have been the most normal thing in the world, he felt nervous. He started the car, pulling out of the drive way. Pepper studied her surroundings curiously as the battled the busy LA traffic. Everything seemed familiar, yet it had changed. Tony watched her from the corner of his eyes, trying to steal a glance at her whenever he was sure she wasn't looking. She had her hair pulled into a messy ponytail, revealing the scar that had not yet healed completely. Dressed in jeans and a casual sweater, she looked simply gorgeous.

"If you'd take a turn here, we would be heading to Hammer Industries, right?", she asked him suddenly.

"Yeah…", he answered with no expression on his face. "I suppose you remember that Hammer is an ass." Hoping that she would understand his hate for the guy, Tony had this feeling that he was involved in Pepper's accident somehow.

"Yeah, well I never understood why you hate him so much."

"I have good reasons, but what bugs me the most is that he has always had a crush on you and he thinks of himself as a genius. I mean, the guy can't even role play as an apple store genius.", Tony told her, thinking of the way Hammer had looked at Pepper the last time he saw her before the accident, he had an almost hungry look on his face and Tony only wanted to protect Pepper from him. He thought of their baby too, the one reason that had finally made all the difference.

They spent the next ten minutes in silence and it no longer felt uncomfortable to Pepper to be sitting with him like this. Tony would have liked for them to talk about anything really, just to have a conversation with her. He missed their talks, hours long sometimes - about everything important, and nothing important at all.

"Here we are.", he said, pulling into their driveway.

Tony parked the car and watched her as she studied the mansion, wide-eyed. He had to smile at how beautiful she looked.

"It's gorgeous, Tony .", she whispered and he chuckled.

"I forgot to tell you, Pepper, but somebody is waiting for you in there."

"What do you mean?", she asked, puzzled, for she had been sure they would spend the day alone together.

He led her into the house, smiling. As soon as he opened the front door, dummy, butterfingers and Jarvis (only the voice) were waiting for her. A beautiful, big smile spread on Pepper's face and she looked up to meet Tony 's eyes. He, too, smiled, watching as dummy tried to open a bottle of champagne, but failed. The living room was decorated with a lot of red balloons and a huge banner saying "Welcome Home Miss Potts", she guessed it was made by butterfingers since the letter was barely readable.

They walked through the house together, him showing her the large great-room and the generous kitchen. Pepper was amazed by the beautiful backyard that led to the ocean and its luxury pool. She liked everything she saw and could imagine that she had enjoyed living there. Downstairs, Tony had told her, was his workshop and a dance studio he had built for her, since she has always liked dancing.

"Can I see upstairs?", she asked him.

"Of course, sweetheart. This is your house too."

The first door to the left wasn't completely shut and Pepper peeked into the room, realizing that she must have found the master bedroom. Her cheeks turned a bright shade of red instantly and Tony couldn't help but chuckle.

"Go in there.", he encourage her, smiling.

She pushed the door open and stepped into the large room, taking it all in. The bedroom was beautiful and she could see how both her and Tony had given their input when it came to decoration. Everything was simple but classy with the bit of playful edge to it, that was undoubtedly her taste. Across the room she found a large dresser that must have been hers, she figured, realizing how much jewelry had been placed on top of it. She walked over until she stood in front of, glancing at her own reflection in the mirror. Her scar was visible and she adjusted her bangs quickly, trying to cover the reminder of her injuries.

Tony watched her, wondering if she was trying to hide her scars from him or from her own scrutinizing eyes. He walked up behind her, keeping the bit of distance she would appreciate. Pepper's fingers played with the pieces of jewelry and she wondered how many of those had been given to her on occasions she didn't remember now. Finally, her eyes fell to a gorgeous diamond necklace that she was in love with immediately. It looked expensive and very classy, something you would wear only on special days.

Carefully, she reached out to pick it up, fascinated by the way the sunlight played with the sparkling diamonds. Pepper's eyes closed slowly and in the sudden darkness she could see herself, smiling. Tony was right behind her, their bodies almost touching. She could feel her whole body tense and shiver as he reached around her, fastening the tiny clip of the necklace for her. He placed a gentle kiss on her neck, causing her eyes to snap open.

Pepper looked into the mirror in shock and confusion. Tony was right there next to her, looking at her, puzzled. Her eyes fell to the necklace once again, that was still in her hands. Just to be sure, she reached up to touch her neck, but found nothing but bare skin. She bit her lip, realizing that what she had just experienced hadn't really happened - at least not right in this moment.

"Are you okay, darling?", he asked, sounding worried.

"Yeah.", she told him weakly.

Maybe, this was something that had happened a while ago, she thought. Somewhere in that grey area that was nothing but unknown and forgotten to her.

"I gave you this necklace for our first Valentine's Day.", Tony explained.

She looked up at him with a small smile, realizing that she had just experienced a tiny flashback of her past. As much as it should have made her happy, she felt a certain sadness that this was all she had seen. Only this one little moment, that one glance into their life together. It might not have been much, but it made her crave for more.

"It's beautiful."

"It really is.", he smiled, his eyes glued to her, making her blush.

"Can I see the other rooms?", Pepper asked him, trying to change the subject to more comfortable territory.

"Come on. I'll show you."

Tony walked her through a guest bedroom and its adjacent bathroom and finally to his workshop. This room, she thought, was very…Tonyish. Simple and organized with a lot of cars and monitors and of course, the iron man suits. Two black and white paintings were the only kind of decoration and while she found the room to be quite beautiful, she obviously hadn't had any say in arranging it.

Slowly, Pepper walked around the desk, her hand gliding over its smooth, wooden surface. She smiled as she found a picture of herself on the desk. As much as it might have been something you could expect - a man having the picture of his girlfriend on his desk - in her current situation, Pepper found it very sweet and special. She continued walking, inspecting the many books and binders on his shelves. On the last shelf she found a few photo albums and she looked at Tony expectantly.

"Can I look at them?", she asked.

"Sure. You made most of them, to be honest.", he chuckled.

Pepper pulled out one of the albums, its cover reading 'London '07'. She opened it and was greeted by a picture of herself - sound asleep in her seat on a plane. She looked at him questioningly, wondering why she would have put such a picture in there. He smiled, shrugging his shoulders. Pepper flipped the page and stared at the next photo for a long time. Tony watched her and noticed how focused she was on the people on the picture, obviously trying to put the pieces of memories together.

"This is your mom, right?", she asked.

"It would have been very happy to know im with someone so special" He said as he sighed, leaving Pepper to wonder how his parents had died.

The picture was labled 'Maria, Howard and Tony ' The picture was old, so Tony looked about 5 years old, which melted Pepper's heart.

"Howard is my father.", Tony explained, knowing that Pepper wouldn't have any memories of his father, since he barely spoke of him.

She felt weird to ask him such a thing, almost afraid she would open some old wounds in him. However, in a way she must be part of their family and she wanted to know about them as much as possible. It wasn't until a few seconds later that she realized Tony was looking at the photo with a pained expression and that his eyes had turned a little red.

A lump formed somewhere deep in Pepper's throat and she tried hard to swallow before he would notice. Her eyes fell to the photo again and she tried her hardest to remember anything about Tony 's family. She flipped the page as she realize that nothing would come to her mind. As she continued looking at the pictures, Tony patiently explained who all those people were.

A picture of him together with her niece made her wonder what he was like with children. They looked very comfortable together right there. She was a beautiful little girl and he was smiling at her brightly, tickling her sides. Suddenly, it all became too frustrating. Every single person in this album was a part of her life, yet she couldn't even remember ever meeting them.

Pepper placed the album on the floor and stood up with a sigh. Tony looked at her sadly, knowing that this must have been really hard for her. Deep down, he had hoped that seeing pictures of the past would trigger something within her. He'd take anything, really - the smallest of reactions. He almost wanted to tell her to continue looking at photos - maybe if only she'd see enough of them, she would remember. But Tony knew that it wouldn't be fair to pressure her, so he let her get up. He still couldn't get his parents out of his mind, so he said

"I can't do this any longer.", she whispered, leaving his office.

Tony stayed behind, giving her a moment to calm down and compose herself. Normally, he wouldn't be afraid to comfort her. They shared a very special bond that went beyond love. Pepper had learned to trust him and before her accident, she had never been reluctant to share her feelings and fears with him. Now, he couldn't make her feel comfortable with a simple hug any longer. They were so far from that deep, unconditional trust they had once shared, that he couldn't help but wonder if he'd ever be able to restore her faith in him and their love.

Eventually, he left the office too, following her. Her turned around a corner, assuming she would be back downstairs by now, maybe outside. His breath caught when he found her standing in front of the room that was meant to be the nursery. She had opened the door and was staring into the room.

What if she would get her memory back right now? What if their baby's room would trigger the reaction he had hoped to achieve earlier? Pepper would never forgive him for keeping this from her. Maybe she wouldn't realize what she was looking at. Just an empty room that had yet to be decorated.

Suddenly, Tony felt like running. He didn't want to find out if she would realize that this was meant to be a room for the child that they had never been able to welcome into the world. He was afraid.

"What is this room for?", he heard her ask, and for a moment everything stood still.


	14. Chapter 14

**Thanks for all the reviews! you guys are amazing! Btw, Im thinking about writing a love making scene, but im not so sure if you guys are okay with it, so please let me know! **

Pepper turned to look at him, waiting for an answer. He looked different, somehow, pale and almost as if he might get sick. She watched him curiously and for the briefest of moments Pepper felt guilty for opening the door to this room. Apparently, she wasn't welcome to do so. But then she remembered that it was her house too and even if she felt a bit awkward here, he had told her to feel at home.

"Tony?"

"It's a… uhm… guest bedroom…", he lied.

"Oh… why is it not furnished?"

He wanted to tell her. Tony wanted her to know why this room was so empty. He wanted her to know why she was still fighting those stomach pains - she still believed it was just her healing scar that hurt. Tony wanted to tell her so he could finally cry with her. To lift the huge weight he had been carrying around for weeks off his shoulders.

But he couldn't.

She was so unaware of the true depth of their misery, that he couldn't bring himself to hurt her now. He'd tell her soon - just not right now.

"We were going to re-do the room. But then you had your accident and I just didn't want to do it alone."

Pepper smiled at him and he was afraid it might break his heart. They didn't lie to each other. Long before they had fallen in love, their friendship had been based on the very simple principle of trust. She trusted him to be honest with her and he expected the same from her. As much as their honesty had sometimes hurt the other's feelings, their relationship and the love for one another had always been too important to let a lie come between them. They didn't tell half the truth or an edited version of it.

They simply didn't lie to each other.

Yet, there he stood, lying straight to Pepper's face. He justified it with the fear of hurting her. Tony knew that it would break something within her, if he'd tell her that she had lost their baby. He was right to keep it from her now, that all her other wounds were barely healing.

Still, it felt so wrong.

"That's very sweet of you,Tony.", she smiled at him. "Thank you."

"You're welcome.", he muttered, avoiding her gaze.

"Do you think we could make something for lunch? I'm starving."

"Sure… should I order us something?", Tony asked her.

"I remember ordering from that Italian place all the time when you were working on the blue car. Is it still there?"

"It is.", he smiled. "We still order there now sometimes. It's… well… it's the restaurant we went to for our first real date."

She couldn't help but blush a little at the mention of their first date. Pepper wondered if it had been him picking the restaurant and if so, whether he had done it knowing that she loved that place. Following him downstairs, she watched as he called the restaurant, ordering without ever asking her what she would want to eat. But as he ended the call, Pepper realized that she would have probably ordered the same things anyway. Apparently, he knew her very well. She liked the idea of another person knowing those small, seemingly unimportant details about her, but it also made her sad that she didn't know Tony nearly as well. There was no way she would have known what food he'd prefer.

When the food arrived they sat in the kitchen together and for the first time Pepper felt somewhat relaxed in his presence. They talked about unimportant things, but she actually found herself enjoying his company. Every now and then, he'd still drop a comment that reminded her of the man she knew. The bit of sarcasm in his tone came through as he talked about Justin Hammer wanting to create an iron man suit and also about that time at court when he jacked the monitors and started using videos against Justin. She had actually laughed when Tony had told her. At one point, she thought he was being downright rude and to her utter surprise, she laughed out loud.

"Tony stop it.", she laughed and he chuckled.

"What? It's true. You can't imagine, Pep. It's all 'Tony my bff' here and 'Tony and I are like brothers' there.  
"Stop!", she giggled, holding her aching stomach with one hand.

It was a different kind of pain she felt. The kind you only feel when you're laughing so hard, that you just cannot stop.

'I wanna make Iron Man look like an antique.' Tony said mimicking Hammer."You know he even dated a paparazzi that I had slept with, and he kept trying to show off in my face" he continued.

"Tony!", she squeaked. "Knock it off!"

She hit his arm playfully, before reaching up to wipe a tear out of the corner of her eye. She hadn't felt this good in quite a while and she slowly started to believe that maybe it had been a good idea to spend a day with Tony .

"You're still using violence when you can't come up with anything else, huh?", he chuckled, rubbing his arm where Pepper had slapped him.

"I might have lost my memory but I certainly didn't lose all common sense.", Pepper smirked. "Men like you need a good slap every now and then."

"Do we?", he asked, raising an eyebrow. "I know you well… but I didn't know that this is the kind of stuff you're into."

She didn't catch the naughty meaning of his words immediately, but when she did, Pepper blushed furiously. She didn't know that they always joked around like this - with a bit of a double meaning to the simplest of things. She had no recollection of the playful banter and the sexual references they had shared long before they had been a couple. Oddly enough and even though Pepper felt embarrassed, she didn't mind the jokes coming from Tony . Something about it seemed surprisingly normal.

"I wouldn't slap you… at least not too hard.", she mumbled, studying the food that was still left on her plate, a coy smile playing on her lips.

"What was that?", Tony asked, staring at her, his expression a mixture of surprise and playfulness.

Pepper turned and even deeper shade of red, her cheeks feeling almost unbearably hot all of the sudden. She bit her lip, cursing herself inwardly for her comment. She tried to think of a smart thing to say but nothing would come to her mind. Amidst all of the awkwardness and unfamiliarity she had dared to make a rather cheeky comment and now she regretted doing so.

"I have to use the bathroom.", she told him, leaving the table, not looking at him.

Tony let her go, starting to clear the table once he had heard the bathroom door close. She wouldn't eat another bite of her lunch anyway. He had enjoyed that one little moment so much. The naughty little comment she had dropped, most likely not thinking about it at all. For him, however, it had been more than just a bit of their playful goofiness.

Now, he couldn't help but think about her as the woman he knew. The Pepper that could turn him on with just a few words, with a wink or a smile. Tony wanted to become her friend again, to win her trust once more. Still, his mind kept circling around those things that weren't meant to be right now, the moments in their life that nobody else would ever be a part off. Those moments when it was just them - alone, together, intimate. The moments when she was his and his alone. And when he was hers, unconditionally. Those moments that she wouldn't allow now and maybe never again. The ones he craved for so desperately - every night, every time he wasn't with her and even more so when he was.

"What are we like,Tony?", she whispered, startling him.

He turned around to see her standing there, twisting the ring on her finger nervously, the crimson color already creeping back into her cheeks.

"What do you mean?"

"W-what are we like when we are together?"

Tony didn't understand what she meant, looking at her questioningly. Something about her made him wonder if she wouldn't rather disappear through the wooden floor right now. There she stood, her head hanging low, eyes cast down. She was biting her lip so hard that he was afraid she might make it bleed.

"You and I.", Pepper whispered. "What is it like?"

She finally met his eyes, silently begging him to understand what she was saying even though she couldn't bring herself to put it into words. Tony replayed her words in his head when their meaning suddenly hit him.

"Oh…", he breathed. "You mean…"

"Yeah."

A small, knowing smile spread on Tony's lips and he brought his hand up to rub the back of his neck, contemplating what to say. This was a situation you couldn't be prepared for and he had trouble to form a coherent sentence. What to tell the woman you love about the intimacy you share, when she cannot even remember loving you?

"Come on.", he finally spoke, taking Pepper's hand into his own and pulling her towards the staircase.

She followed him reluctantly, her nervousness increasing as he led her to their bedroom. Suddenly Pepper was afraid that he had misunderstood her or that he thought that she would want him to just show her the answer to her question. There was something about him that she liked, something that made all the difference between now and the last time she could remember. But she didn't want this. Not at all. Suddenly, Pepper didn't want to be in a bedroom with him.

"Tony…"

"It's okay.", he smiled, squeezing her hand. "It's okay, sweetheart."

She let him lead her into the room and towards the bed. Pepper's stomach clenched and she wished he would let go of her hand.

"Sit down.", Tony told her and she obeyed, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.

He joined Pepper on the bed wrapping an arm around her when he noticed her scooting away from him. Her body stiffened and she didn't know if she could trust his intentions. She didn't want to know any longer. She didn't care about the answers to her question.

"Please don't be scared of me, Pep. Don't ever be scared of me.", Tony pleaded, sensing her insecurity.  
"Why did you bring me up here?"

"Because I want to answer your question."

"Why here?", Pepper whispered, still a little uncomfortable with the situation.

"This is where it first happened.", Tony answered, an unwelcome lump forming in his throat. "This is where it all changed for us, Pepper."

She let her eyes wander over the neatly made bed, her hand smoothing the soft sheet, trying to imagine them there, together. She closed her eyes, praying for another flash of memories, another little peek into her 's hand had slid down to her lower back and she felt the warm, gentle sensation of his touch.

"We're good together, aren't we?", she whispered.

"We are.", Tony answered, carefully inching closer to her.

She could feel him, knew he was coming closer to her, but Pepper didn't shy away. She wasn't ready for this. She wasn't ready for him to be this close to her, but she couldn't pull herself away from him either. Her breath caught when he gently nuzzled her cheek with his nose.

"What is your most amazing memory of us together? Here in this room…", Pepper asked, her voice so quiet that he could barely hear her, despite their physical closeness. "On this bed…"

Tony's heart was beating as fast as it had back then, years ago, when he had slept with her for the first time. He thought about her question, mental images of the many times they had shared intimate moments playing in front of his mind's eye.

One moment stood out. One moment that had been so passionate and so intimate. One moment that had changed the way he felt about her and the way he felt about life.

Without thinking about it - completely lost in the memory and her presence in his arms right then – Tony spoke.

"The night we made our baby."

**Cliffhanger :) **


	15. Chapter 15

Pepper pushed him away, looking at him with a bewildered expression, her heart suddenly pounding unbearably hard. He stared at her, wide-eyed, panic creeping into every fiber of his being. In this one weak moment, when he had allowed himself to get lost in the closeness of their bodies and the depths of his memories, Tony had spoken without even thinking. Now, he wouldn't be able to turn back the time, to take back what he had told Pepper. Now she would know.

"W-what did you say?", she whispered, her voice already breaking.

"Pepper…", he whispered, reaching out for her.

"N-no.", she cried, trying to get as far away from him as possible. "What do you mean by 'our baby'?"

Her tears finally spilled over, silently running down her cheeks. She looked as sick as Tony felt and he had to close his eyes to avoid his own tears. He could feel them welling up, the hot tears hurting his eyes. He pinched the base of his nose hard, fighting against the pounding in his head.

"Anthony?", she asked again. He flinched when he heard the tone in which he talked to him. She had even used his first name, he felt like he could punch himself for being so stupid.

"We were expecting a child, Pepper.", he whispered, finally meeting her eyes. "You were pregnant."

Tony watched as her hands flew to her stomach, desperately trying to find any indication of a baby. She had always wanted a child, but never gotten pregnant. And now he was telling her that she had carried their baby, but she had lost it. A gut wrenching sob shook her fragile body and Tony moved closer, trying to take her into his arms.

"Don't touch me.", Pepper pleaded, choking on her tears. "Where's my baby? I want my baby back,Tony!"

He reached out for her once again but she slapped his hand away, getting off the bed. Pepper was panicking and it scared him to see her like that. This was exactly what he had been so afraid of. The little bit of trust he had won again, was now destroyed and if she wouldn't let him in now, then maybe Tony had lost her for good.

"Our baby is gone, Pepper.", he whispered as loud as he could, but the lump in his throat made it come out as a hissing sound.

"You liar.", she hissed. "You're lying to me. Tell me that this is not true!"

"I'm sorry, darling. I am so sorry."

She stumbled backwards until the wall stopped her, her hands still covering her belly. Tony got up immediately, afraid she would fall and hurt herself. He could see Pepper's chest heave with the severity of her cries and her hands were trembling where she had placed them on the spot where their child should have been laying - protected, safe, alive.

"W-what happened? What happened to my baby?"

"She didn't survive the accident, Pepper. Your injuries were so severe that there was nothing they could do for her."

"Her? It was a girl?", she sobbed, her words almost inaudible.

"I-I don't know. We never found out. I just… I always thought it would be a little girl."

In her own agony and pain, Pepper failed to realize that he was battling tears as well, that his voice was quiet and hoarse and that his bottom lip was trembling slightly. She stared at him, then at her flat belly, then back up at him again.

"You didn't tell me.", she gasped. "You damn bastard lied to me all this time. All those weeks. Nobody told me about my baby."  
"Pepper… I… we didn't want to…"

"Shut up!", she yelled. "You liar… you… dirty… you liar! How could you do this to me?"

Tony stepped closer once again, knowing that she was about to reach a breaking point, that he would need to catch her when she fell. Pepper took a few quick steps away from him, almost tripping over her own feet.

"Do not come closer! Don't you ever touch me again!"

With those words she left the bedroom, running aimlessly down the stairs and into the backyard. He let her go, knowing that he had lost her. Tony had fought so hard to get her to trust him a little, to be comfortable around him. And when she had finally let her guard down a little, he had destroyed it all. All he had ever wanted was to protect her, to make sure her heart wouldn't break with the agonizing pain of losing a child. But now, adding to the pain of her miscarriage, Pepper felt betrayed and lied to, cheated and used. The look on her face when she had found out about their baby would forever be burned in his memory. Never would Tony be able to forget that he was the one that had caused her all this pain.

He walked back over to the bed, sitting on its edge with a heavy sigh. He pulled out the ultrasound picture of their baby, staring at the tiny spot. This picture brought him so much pain and heartache, yet he couldn't let go of it. He never would. Through the open window he could hear Pepper sobbing outside, gasping for air. His heart shattered into a thousand pieces and he wondered how life could be so cruel, when all he would have ever asked for, was for him and Pepper to be a happy family. Why was it that they couldn't have it all? Why did he have all those things that didn't mean anything, when all he really wanted was his beautiful girlfriend and their child.

Now he had neither of them, and everything else paled in comparison, nothing else mattered or ever would.

Tony got up, walking down the stairs slowly. She needed him there with her. Pepper might not have wanted him, but she did need him. And he needed her. He would never be able to make his peace with the situation if he wouldn't ever get the chance to mourn with her.

As he reached the backdoor, he saw her laying on a lawn chair, curled up into a small ball, still clutching her stomach. Tony pressed the picture of their child to his chest, right above his heart, suddenly afraid to go to her. There was only so much rejection he could take.

Only a few feet away, but lost in her own world, Pepper tried to breath. Her chest was hurting from all the crying and her eyes felt sore. She kept choking on her own tears, but couldn't seem to stop. She'd thought that nothing could ever compare to the misery that came with losing the past year of your memory, but she had to learn that she had been wrong. Now, she didn't even see any use in fighting to get her memories back. Maybe it was better that way - not knowing what it had been like when her baby had still been alive.

Another heavy sob shook her body and she cried out in both physical and emotional pain. She didn't hear him approach her and when he sat down on the edge of her chair, placing a hand on her back, she jumped. Pepper sat up only to come face to face with Tony, who was looking at her, his eyes red and wet with tears, something she had never seen in him before.

"Go away.", she whispered, but he didn't move. "Go!", Pepper told him again, raising her voice.

A tear slipped down his cheek, but Tony still didn't get up.

"Get away from me!", she yelled, hitting his chest with her fist.

Tony wrapped his arms around her small body, holding her close. She squirmed in his embrace, hitting his chest, right where his arc reactor was, as hard as she could and it hurt him everytime her fist met his reactor. Her small fists came down on him over and over again, but he didn't give in.

"I want my baby back.", she cried. "You lied! Give me my baby back!"

Her arms were getting weaker by the second and he felt her body going limp in his arms. He pulled Pepper closer, bringing her head down against his chest. She balled his shirt in her hands, clinging to him tightly. Her cries were almost more than he could take. Never before had he seen Pepper like this and he didn't know if he could cope with it. Tony buried his face in her hair, wetting it with his tears.

Finally, they cried together. Finally, he was able to mourn the loss of his child with Pepper. He'd never really wanted to be a father, but her telling him he was going to be a daddy had been the best moment of his life. They had lost a child. Their baby was gone and nothing would ever bring her back, but he was not going to lose Pepper too. He had promised to fight and he would do so.

"Why did you not tell me?", she whispered, crying quietly now.

"I was so scared.", Tony told her. "I'm so afraid I will lose you."

He had hoped that she would answer him, telling him that he wouldn't lose her, that she could forgive him for keeping this from her. But Pepper didn't answer. Tony pulled her closer still, thinking that maybe if only he held her close enough, she wouldn't go.

"I'm so sorry, darling. Please, Pep…"

She looked up at him, seeing what she never thought she would: the cold, arrogant, self-centered, obnoxious man she remembered was sitting with her, crying over a baby that had been both his and hers. As much as she hated that he had not told her about the pregnancy until now, a small part of her felt bad for him. Maybe it was selfish to think that she was the only one hurting. Maybe he felt a similar pain. Maybe his heart was as broken as hers.

"How far along was I?", she whispered.

"Four months. You could hardly see a bump. But it was there…and I… I could always see it."

"You don't like children.", Pepper told him, remembering how they made him uncomfortable and didn't fit into his lifestyle.

"I have come a long way.", he answered, hoping that would be a good enough explanation. "I loved this baby. I still love our baby."

Pepper squeezed her eyes shut at his words. She would have never believed it was possible to cry so many tears. She placed her head on his shoulder, choosing to stay silent. He had hurt her by not telling her the truth right away, but she understood that he was just as hurt. He had lost a baby too. Pepper wasn't alone.

"I don't even remember being pregnant. How can I forget about my own baby?"

"It's not your fault, darling. None of this is.", he reassured her.

He placed the ultrasound picture into Pepper's lap and she covered it with her hand carefully, knowing immediately what the picture would show. She caressed the shiny paper gently, not looking at the picture of their unborn child.

"I don't remember our baby, but I miss it. How is that even possible?"

"We will always miss her.", Tony whispered.

She looked into his eyes, meeting his warm, sad gaze. No, she wouldn't be able to give up on them over this. She had lost too much already to lose him too.

"You really believe it would have been a girl, huh?", Pepper smiled sadly.

"With all my heart.", he replied. "Can't you tell?", he asked, pointing to the ultrasound picture.

Pepper picked it up, another tear running down her cheek. It wasn't easy to make out the details of their baby's body, but as she studied it, she found the tiny arms and legs, reminding her that this little life had been lost before it ever had a chance to develop.

Just like Tony had done earlier, she brought the picture to rest against her heart, knowing there would always be an empty spot. Carefully, he placed his hand on top of hers, praying that she would let him do so.

"Forgive me.", he whispered into her neck. "Forgive me, Pep."

She pressed her lips against the side of his head, lingering there, as they held the only memory of their child against her broken heart. Pepper found his other hand, lacing their fingers. She gave his hand a tight squeeze and he knew that she was going to forgive him.

"I love you.", Tony whispered, and another squeeze of her hand gave him hope that - some day - she was going to love him too.


	16. Chapter 16

**Got a lot of reviews in the last chapter! Thanks to all of you who have been reading this from the very beginning (which was, i have to admit, not very good)**

He had been holding her in his arms for so long, that he only realized how late it was getting when Pepper shivered slightly, the setting sun no longer providing enough heat to keep her warm. Her eyes were closed but Tony knew that she wasn't sleeping. Pepepr still held the ultrasound picture of their child against her chest, her thumb caressing it absentmindedly. He dared to rest his head on top of hers, enjoying the warm, comfortable feeling of her soft hair against his cheeks. The burden had finally been lifted from his shoulders, yet he couldn't quite breath freely. Tony knew that he was forgiven, that somehow, fate had been kind enough to give him yet another chance to make things right with her.

Yes, Pepper had forgiven him for lying. But he knew she wouldn't forget. He buried his face in her hair, wondering if forgiveness would be enough, or if not being able to ever forget, would always keep her from letting him love her again.

"That spare room upstairs…", Pepper whispered, her voice weak and hoarse from hours of silent crying.

"It was meant to be the nursery.", he finished her sentence.

"Did we buy things for her already?", she asked and Tony noticed how she had adapted his feeling that the baby would have been a little girl.

"We had a crib and some toys and other necessities. Your mom had given us a baby blanket when we visited her right before your accident."

"Did you keep everything?"

He hesitated for the briefest of moments, knowing Pepper would want to see those things. He was afraid that it might be too much, looking at what could have been when she was still not past her grief.

"Sarah took everything for now.", Tony finally told her, because he would not bring another lie into their complicated and fragile relationship.

She was silent for a long moment, staring into the sky, watching the sun set over Malibu. If her life wouldn't have taken this tragic turn, then she would appreciate this moment very much. The scenery was gorgeous and she was in the strong arms of a rather handsome man. It was all very movie-like and romantic, wouldn't she be holding this picture in her hands and would the arms wrapped around her not belong to the boyfriend she didn't remember loving.

"Can we get those things back? I'd like to keep them here in the house… since this is her home."

"Okay, darling. We will get them back."

She shivered again in his arms and even though it might have easily been a chill that their conversation gave her, Tony got up carefully. It wasn't warm any longer and the sky was almost dark now. He didn't want her to catch a cold.

"Come on sweetheart. Lets get back inside."

Pepper followed him wordlessly, her hand in his. She didn't flinch or shy away when he stopped in the kitchen, wiping the smudged mascara off her cheeks.

"You can keep that.", Tony told her, pointing to the ultrasound picture she was still clutching tightly.

"Thanks.", she smiled.

"Would you like to have dinner here?"

He smiled at her sweetly, hoping she would agree to stay just a little longer. He was desperate for a normal conversation with her, something that wouldn't end in tears, screaming and more heartache. He needed a bit of sweet banter and silly bickering. Yet he was fully aware that after everything they had been through today, sweet and silly wasn't exactly to be expected.  
"I'm really not hungry.", she answered, and Tony figured that this was her way of telling him nicely that she would not like to stay any longer.

"I'll take you back to your mom's then.", Tony smiled sadly, already walking away to find his car keys.

Pepper watched him disappear around the corner and she sat down on one of the kitchen chairs, sighing heavily. Some day this all had to get better. Life couldn't always be this hard and painful, right? Her thoughts went back to their conversation from earlier and she tried to remember how the baby had even come up in the first place. She realized that they had been talking about a very delicate and intimate subject and she couldn't help but blush. Her mind was still clouded with thoughts of their baby, but slowly, everything else that had led to this subject came back to her.

The way he had suddenly been so close to her, sending shivers up and down her spine. How he had nuzzled her cheek, their bodies almost flush. Pepper bit her lip hard, thinking to herself that he had felt good. It had felt new and scary, nerve-wracking and exciting. Most of all, it had made her heart beat out of her chest.

"Found the keys.", Tony interrupted her thoughts, making her jump out of her seat.

"I don't wanna go just yet.", she told him, almost gasping when she realized how quickly and without thinking she had spoken.

A small, but obvious smile formed on his lips and he dropped the keys on the kitchen counter. Her cheeks were flushed with a bright red and he bit the inside of his cheek to hold back his laughter. She was adorable when she got all flustered and embarrassed.

"So you would like to have dinner after all?"

"I'm not really… uhm… I'm not hungry. Maybe later. I just thought I could… we could… just…"

"I would like that.", Tony interrupted her, saving her from getting even more embarrassed than she already was.

Pepper smiled slightly, knowing that he had just saved her from endless rambling. She took a last glance at the picture of her baby before sliding it into her purse. For tonight, she had had enough sadness. In her deepest despair Tony had proven to be a true friend and her strong shoulder to cry on. However, and maybe even more importantly, he had also showed her another side of him. The emotional, loving father that he could have been - that he had wanted to be. As sad as their day might have been, in a way it made her feel closer to Tony.

"There is something you haven't seen yet.", Tony said, smiling mysteriously.

"What is it?"

He held his hand out for her, hoping that Pepper would take it. To his surprise, her hand was in his in a heartbeat. She mirrored his smile shyly and followed him down the hallway until they reached a door she hadn't opened yet. Tony twisted its handle and she found herself facing a flight of stairs into the basement. They took the few stairs wordlessly, quickly reaching a large, dark room.

"Where are we?", Pepper asked curiously.

Tony turned on the lights, watching in awe as her face lit up as well, a bright smile suddenly playing on her lips. Pepper looked at him, then back into the room, feeling more at home than she had in any of the other rooms.

"I have a dance studio here?"

"Of course you do. You didn't think I could have convinced you to move in with me without building you a dance studio, did you?"

She couldn't help but laugh at this, nudging his shoulder lightly.

"I still cant believe I ever agreed to move in with you. So, yes, I guess a dance studio really was your only chance to convince me."

Tony looked at her, a very cute pout slowly forming. She remembered this - the cute pout that he always used to convince her of anything. She had seen it a few times and it made her smile knowing that he still did this. Not everything seemed to have changed.

"I love it.", Pepper smiled, letting go of his hand.

She walked into the large room, watching herself in the mirrors surrounding her. The hi-fi system in the opposite corner of the dance studio caught her eye and Pepper walked over to it, pushing the play button. A soft, slow piano song started playing and she just stood there for a moment, soaking up the beautiful notes creating this piece of music.

Slowly, the melody began to take over her body, the way it always did, no matter what song she would listen to. Pepper began to sway carefully, cautions of her healing injuries, yet unable to stop herself from dancing. She closed her eyes, oblivious to everything around her, and she began to dance.

Tony watched her in awe, her movements in perfect sync with the music, almost as if she had choreographed this dance in arduous work. This was what she did best, apart from keeping him out of trouble. The way she got so lost in the music, almost as if she was in her own world, was unique.

He had watched her dance many times over the years. Sometimes at parties where a lot of people could see her. Sometimes at home, for his eyes only. Sometimes Pepper had known that he was watching, often she had not. Her gracefulness and beauty was still as mesmerizing as ever, maybe even more so now.

Tony took a step into the room, his feet moving on their own accord, his brain not working properly. His eyes were fixed on Pepper's figure dancing through the room almost as if she was floating. He caught her hand mid-air and her eyes flew open, her movements stilling.

"Dance with me.", he whispered, his words a soft plea.

Pepper smiled and welcomed him into her arms, placing a hand on his shoulder while he placed his low on her back. Their steps were small and a little clumsy, creating more of a swaying than actual dancing, but somehow, she didn't mind.

"You don't dance.", she giggled softly. "At least you didn't back then."

"I still don't. Not really."

"So is this the first time ever for us to dance?"

"No.", Tony smiled. "We did once."

He could see how hard Pepper was trying to hold back a smile and it amused him thoroughly.

"Tell me about it."

" First one was at the Disney Concert Hall , for some fireman thing, the second one was on your birthday.", he sighed. "And I only agreed because I wanted to get you into bed."

"Tony!", she squeaked, pushing him lightly.

"It's true!", he laughed. "And, damn, it worked wonders."

"Oh my goodness.", she mumbled, her face deeply red. "You're unbelievable."

"You had been asking me all night during your party.", Tony explained. "But I don't do dancing in front of people. When we got home, I put your favorite song on and we danced in our bedroom. I didn't even step on your feet."

She smiled and in a moment of simple happiness, she let her head fall against his chest without thinking. He pulled her closer carefully as they continued swaying to the piano song. They hadn't danced like this in a long time and even though Tony could remember all of the romantic moments that Pepper had no memory off, it felt somewhat new and exciting to him too. He was learning to appreciate being with her like this all over again, her fate having taught him to appreciate the small moments.

"You're not too bad.", she whispered into his chest, as the last notes of the song slowly began to die away.

When the room was silent, Pepper lifted her head to meet his gorgeous brown eyes. He didn't let go of her and she didn't make a move to do so either.

"Thank you for the dance,Tony."

He nodded his head with a smile, daring to move a little closer. Pepper closed her eyes. Whatever he was about to do - ignoring her racing heart and trembling hands – she decided to let him.


	17. Chapter 17

Tony watched her eyes fall shut and even though this should have encouraged him, it made him even more nervous than he had already been. He had been thinking about kissing her again for weeks now. Every night that he had gone to bed lonely, longing for Pepper to be with him, he had imagined her lips on his. Now, after all they had been through lately - each of them on their own, yet somehow together - he finally found himself so close to her lips that he could feel her breath on his skin.

Slowly, he leaned in and when his lips were almost there, almost upon hers once again, all courage and determination left him. Tony turned his head slightly, placing a loving kiss on her cheek. His ears caught her low, barely audible sigh, but his brain wouldn't register its meaning. He had placed his left hand carefully against her neck, almost as if to hold her in place - for what, he didn't quite know.

Pepper enjoyed the feel of his lips against the skin of her cheek, but this wasn't what she had prepared herself for. She had expected more, hoped for more. She brought her hand up to rest against his cheek, stroking it with her thumb first, before gently guiding his lips to hers. While he had been brave enough to make the first move, Pepper would have never had the courage to initiate a kiss. However, when he was there, so close that her knees were weak and her breath caught somewhere in her throat, it was Pepper who brought up that last, deciding little bit of courage.

Tony slowly followed her guidance until his lips finally met hers. He didn't move, simply resting lips against lips. He brought his free hand to her lower back, to that very same place where he had kept it when they had danced. Pepper's hand fell to his chest and even through the fabric of his shirt, he could feel how cold her hands were. She was just as nervous as he was.

"I love you.", he whispered against her lips, not expecting an answer, but needing to tell her.

He finally moved his lips gently, pressing them against hers. For a moment, Pepper didn't react, her whole body frozen in place, her mind going blank. But then she allowed her heart to take the lead, to guide her through the kiss and she slowly answered his longing lips. To her surprise, it didn't feel awkward or weird. In fact, it felt good.

Pepper felt him pull back slightly, his lips now barely touching hers. She wasn't ready for this to be over just yet. She chased Tony's lips with her own, pecking them softly. She could feel the soft smile on his lips, and it made her heart flutter. He broke the kiss, resting his forehead against Pepper's.

"Looks like you didn't forget how to kiss me.", he whispered.

She looked at him incredulously, her face unreadable. His smile faded and he suddenly became well aware of the fact that his comment might have hurt her feelings. He stared at Pepper, already trying to work out an apology, when he noticed her lips twitching upwards. She bit her bottom lip, trying hard not to smile. But she couldn't hold it back. Soon, Pepper was laughing her infectious full belly laughter finally making Tony smile too.

"You're crazy.", she giggled. "Only you would say something like that."

She wrapped her arms around him tightly, laughing into his chest. He kissed the top of her head, chuckling.

"I thought I might have offended you."

"I thought you did.", Pepper laughed. "And I really don't know why I think this is so funny."

"We're like this a lot, love."

"Really?", she asked, raising her head to look at him.

"Yeah. That one time, I wanted to surprise you with a candlelight dinner. I had it all set up - music, candles, champagne. You were smiling from ear to ear when you walked into the kitchen. I had this perfectly romantic evening planned for us."

"What happened?", Pepper asked him curiously.

"When I opened the champagne I got it all over myself and you couldn't stop laughing."

Pepper giggled, imagining his face when he had been covered in champagne.

"I had this whole night all planned out, Pep. Romantic dinner, a movie and then we would make love all night long."

Pepper blushed furiously, hiding her face back in his chest.

"You know what happened instead?"

She shook her head, a tear running down her cheek from trying too hard to hold back her laughter.

"I had to take my shirt off, everything was all sticky. I mean even our candles ran out for some reason and we had to use my reactor as a flashlight. We didn't get dinner."

"Why not?", Pepper asked, her cheeks hurting from laughing so much.

"We had sex on the kitchen table. And there was nothing slow and sensual about it.", he grinned cheekily.

"Oh my God,Tony!", she exclaimed. "You don't ever stop, do you?"

He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, winking at her. Pepper hit his chest and as weird as it might have seemed, it actually warmed his heart to see that she still did this. Obviously, in Pepper's case, it had become as natural as a reflex.

In a spur of the moment decision, she wrapped her arms around his neck, giving him a tight, loving hug. Tony hesitated for a moment, before embracing her fully. He pressed her small body against his own, enjoying the feeling more than he could express with words. Out of habit, his hand began rubbing her back. Unbeknownst to him, Pepper bit her lip hard. He awoke feelings in her that she didn't know she had and it scared her.

"It's getting pretty late.", she whispered, gently releasing him from her embrace.

Tony took the hint immediately, slowly letting go of her. If their kiss had been confusing even for him, then it must have turned her world upside down. He could understand that she would need time to herself now, time to wrap her mind around everything that had happened that day. As he realized how much they had really been trough in this one day, Tony couldn't help but admire Pepper for her strength.

"Do you want me to take you back to your mum's house now?"

He knew the answer before she spoke, yet he kept that little bit of hope that she would just stay with him.

"If you don't mind.", she smiled and he, too, forced a smile.

"Of course not."

About half an hour later, they found themselves in front ofJanela's house. The car was parked in the driveway, no longer running. It was dark around them and the silence was slowly getting uncomfortable. Yet, Pepper couldn't quite bring herself to just open the door, say her goodbyes and step out of the car. In theory it sounded that easy. In reality, though, she was glued to her seat next to him.

"Thank you for today, Pep. I know it wasn't easy for you."

"Which part?", she smiled, turning her head to look at him.  
"I'm really sorry, love. I know that it was hard for you to find out about the baby. I never meant to hurt you by keeping this to myself for so long."

"It's okay,Tony. I understand why you did this. I wish I would have known earlier, but we cant change it now. Its breaking my heart, but I am glad that I know about her now.", she answered.

"This whole day was such a rollercoaster. I am truly sorry for hurting you the way I did."

Pepper studied his face, noticing the painful expression playing in his eyes. She took his hand and squeezed it, hoping he would understand that he was forgiven, that she would be able to see past his lie. She really did understand his motives and she was willing to take it for what it had been: his way of trying to protect her.

"It wasn't all bad.", Pepper told him. "I kinda liked the kiss."

"Yeah… it wasn't too bad."

"Watch what your saying.", Pepper laughed, poking his side.

"Maybe I need another one to be able to really appreciate it."

"You do realize that my mom is peeking through the curtains over there, don't you?", she giggled.

Tony turned is head in order to look for Janela, but Pepper quickly caught his face between her small hands.

"Don't look,Tony! She'll know that we know if you look now."

"This is worse than high school, Pepper.", he chuckled. "Let's give her something to look at then."

He reached out to take her face in his hands as well, mirroring her actions. She tilted her head to its side, expecting him to go straight for her lips. Instead, she only felt his cheek pressed against her own, his hot breath playing on the sensitive skin of her ear.

"You'll have to pretend to enjoy it, so your mum will believe what she's seeing."

"What if I don't need to pretend?", Pepper asked hoarsely, throwing all caution over board for the second time that day.

When Tony didn't know what to say, he chose to just kiss her instead. He forgot about Janela watching and he forgot about everything that had happened during the long day they had spent together. This was them being what he wanted them to be. They kissed deeper this time, almost a little more daring than before. Tony held himself back, not kissing her as passionately as he would have liked to. He would win her back slowly, one kiss at a time.

"You think she had something to look at now?", Pepper whispered against his lips.

"I don't know… we shouldn't stop quite yet. Just in case your mum hasn't seen us yet."

"Good night,Tony.", she chuckled softly, finally allowing herself to pull away from him.

"Good night, darling."

He didn't pull the car out of the driveway until she was safely inside of the house, the door closed behind her. Pepper found her mother in the kitchen and she had to laugh out loud at her attempt to appear busy with the dishes.

"Hi mom.", she greeted her with a kiss on the cheek.

"Oh, honey, I didn't even hear you come in."

"We saw you, mom. You don't have to act as if you weren't dying to bombard me with questions.", Pepper chuckled.

"He kissed you!", Janela blurted out, forgetting that she should probably be embarrassed about getting caught trying to spy on her daughter.

"Yep.", Pepper smiled, her cheeks getting a little hot.

Janela had seen this look on her daughter's face before. It was a familiar look, yet new and almost better than the one she knew. Pepper seemed to be genuinely happy about having been kissed by Tony. In fact, she was almost glowing. Janela watched her daughter as she grabbed a glass of water, throwing her purse on the kitchen counter in the process. Pepper's cell phone and the ultrasound picture slid out and onto the counter and Janela gasped, quickly covering her mouth.

"It's okay, mom. I'm okay… we both are. Tony and I. Please don't worry about it."

Janela knew that they would have to talk about this some day, that Pepper would need a motherly shoulder to cry on because of this sooner or later. For now, however, she decided to let it go and to take her daughter's words for what they were. She had been told Pepper was okay and she wouldn't push her into talking about it. Not now, not tonight. Not when she and Tony seemed to be rekindling what they'd once had.

"Is he winning you over again?", Janela asked, her voice soft, trembling with emotions only a mother could feel.

"I don't know, mom.", Pepper answered honestly.

"But he is one kiss closer.", her mother smiled. "Isn't he?"

"Actually… he is two kisses closer.", Pepper smiled shyly, touching her bottom lip with her finger tip.


	18. Chapter 18

**I'm the worst person ever! I know! But I honestly haven´t had any time to continue writing my fic until now! I just started Crossfit and exams and all that stuff you know... But well here you go guys! Btw. A BIG thank you to all of you who follow this story, even tho it took me a lot of time to upload!**

Two hours later Pepper found herself snuggled into bed, her blanket pulled up to her chin, arms wrapped around her own body. The small numbers on the alarm clock next to her were moving painfully slowly today, time not passing by as fast as she would have liked. She had only been laying in bed for half an hour and usually she wouldn't have considered this a long time, especially since she was used to struggling with getting a good night's sleep. Now, however, she was indeed bothered. Her body and soul were tired from everything she had gone through today, but her mind couldn't seem to relax.

Every time she was able to push the thoughts of her baby away, new thoughts about Tony would flood her mind, making it impossible to fall asleep. Pepper had been touching her lips constantly ever since they had parted earlier in his car. Their kisses were still on her mind, she could still feel them. She closed her eyes again, hoping to be able to recall another kiss. Maybe if only she'd think hard enough, a memory would come back to her. When nothing seemed to happen, Pepper opened her eyes, groaning. She couldn't and wouldn't spend all night like this. It would surely make her go insane.

She got out of bed and pulled on a pair of jeans and a sweater, not bothering to take off the pajama shirt. She tiptoed downstairs, finding a small notepad on the kitchen counter. She left her mother a short note, telling her that she had taken the car to drive over to Sarah's house. Only a few minutes into the drive, Pepper realized that is was almost midnight and that her sister might not even be awake. But she wouldn't spend a night alone in bed wondering. She'd get Sarah out of bed if she had to.

When she finally rang the doorbell, Pepper felt bad. The house was indeed dark and Sarah was most definitely in bed, probably sound asleep. The light in the hallway came on and her sister opened the door, a robe wrapped around her body, her eyes still half closed.

"Pepper. What's wrong?", she asked, immediately assuming that a late night visit from her younger sister couldn't possibly be a good sign.

"Nothing. Well… I can't sleep.", Pepper smiled apologetically.

Sarah looked at her incredulously, trying to figure out if she was being serious. This couldn't be her sister's reason for waking her in the middle of the night.

"Come in.", she gestured for Pepper to enter the hallway. "And now tell me why you're really here."

Pepper took a deep breath, realizing that this hadn't changed either. She still wasn't able to fool her older sister. Never had been and probably never would. They took a seat in the living room and Sarah pulled a blanket around her bare legs.

"It's the truth. I just can't sleep.", Pepper tried again, unsure if she wanted Sarah to just believe it, or if she wanted her to ask for the reasons behind her sleeplessness.

"And why?"

"I don't know."

"Oh come on, Pepper!", Sarah exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air. "You woke me up, now don't pretend everything is just fine."

"I spent all day with Tony, I know about the baby, he danced with me and we kissed.", she blurted out, watching Sarah's expression turn into utter shock.

To Pepper's surprise, tears began to well up in her sister's eyes. Sarah bit her lip, trying not to cry. She felt embarrassed and bad for lying to Pepper about the baby, for being one of the many people that kept the miscarriage a secret. She'd always known that Pepper would be told about her child at some point, but now that the truth was out, Sarah felt like a dirty liar that had just been confronted with all the horrible things she'd done.

"Pepper…", she started. "Pepper… I'm so sorry. I never meant to…"

"Sarah stop!", Pepper interrupted her, taking her sister's hand in her own. "I'm not mad at you."

"I didn't mean to keep this from you. We all just want what's best for you and…"

"Sarah!", she said again, tears forming in her own eyes now. "You don't have to apologize. I know you meant well. I understand."

"I'm so sorry, Pepper."

Pepper knew that Sarah was no longer apologizing for not telling her about the miscarriage. She knew that her sister was telling her how sorry she was that Pepper had lost a child. Sarah didn't have to be told what it felt like to lose somebody you love with all your heart. She knew the pain, the heartache and devastation you feel. But nothing could ever come close to the pain of losing your child. And the fact that Pepper didn't remember carrying a child didn't mean it made things easier. Not at all.

"It's okay.", Pepper choked out, trying to reassure them both.

She fell forward into her older sister's waiting arms and they embraced each other, not trying to hold back the tears. Pepper had always been like this. When she was sad or moved or just emotional, she cried. She had done so as a child and she still did now that she was a grown , however, didn't usually get like this. She was the more reserved out of the two sisters. She didn't show her own feelings and emotions as openly as Pepper did and she had often wondered if her younger sister might be better off after all. It hadn't always been easy for Sarah to keep everything inside - to cry only after she had been sure everybody else thought she was perfectly fine.

"Can I see the baby's things?", Pepper whispered and Sarah nodded wordlessly.

She led Pepper down into the basement where she had put the crib and the boxes with the baby's toys and necessities a few weeks earlier together with Tony. Sarah remained standing on the bottom stair, while Pepper walked over to the white, beautiful crib. She let her fingers glide over the wood, staring into the empty bed that was meant to be for her child.. The boxes labeled 'Tony and Pepper's baby stuff' caught her eye and she slowly walked over to them with a heavy sigh. The single strip of tape would have been easy to open, but Pepper resisted. She suddenly didn't want to see what could have been. Not alone and not even with her sister. She would take all those things with her and only open the boxes together with Tony.

"Thanks.", she smiled, turning to Sarah who was still watching her every move curiously, the worry for her little sister obvious in her eyes.

Sarah nodded her head, smiling slightly as well. She didn't ask why Pepper didn't open the boxes and she didn't tell her to go ahead and do so. Back upstairs they said in silence for a while, both lost in their own, similar thoughts.

"So… a kiss, huh?", Sarah asked suddenly, glancing at her sister.

"Yeah…", Pepper smiled. "One or two."

Sarah raised an eyebrow, watching Pepper's bitter expression turn into a full, bright smile.

"One or two? It's either or, Pepper.", she laughed lightly.

"Two.", Pepper mumbled, biting her bottom lip.

"Can I squeal or would that be inappropriate?"

"Not inappropriate but very strange.", Pepper laughed. "You don't usually squeal,Sarah."

"Oh, I know. But this situation requires some serious squealing.", she giggled.

It felt good to be a bit light-hearted like this and Pepper enjoyed this little happy moment with her sister. She wondered if their relationship had changed at all over the years that she had no memory of. She and Sarah had always gotten along well, but they were too different to be extremely close like some sisters were. They knew what was going on in the other's life, but wouldn't necessarily confide in the other when it came to their secrets. Pepper loved her older sister very much and she knew that Sarah loved her as well, but something had always kept her from sharing intimate secrets with Sarah.

Somehow, today was different. Maybe it was because she needed to tell somebody what had happened between her and Tony, or maybe because the tears they had shared earlier showed Pepper that Sarah wasn't as calm and collected as she usually was. She had feelings and emotions, too. She could show them just like Pepper could.

"He's good. Like… really good."

"Are will still talking about the kissing or did something else happen?", Sarah asked curiously,

"No. Oh God no!", Pepper screeched. "Sarah!"

"What? You said he's good. And I heard those words come out of your mouth before. And believe me, the last time you said that… you were definitely not talking about him kissing you.", she sniggered.

"You and Tony… I swear, you are so much alike. This is something he would say.", Pepper answered, shaking her head.

"You seem to know him pretty well already. I thought you are just trying to get to know him?"

"It doesn't take a genius to figure that out. I'm sure you two get along wonderfully."

"To be honest… we used to hate each other. Even when it became apparent that you two might be more than just friends. I tried, but sometimes I just could not stand him. And believe me, he used to hate me too."

Pepper giggled. She could very well imagine that Sarah's personality and Tony's would not always work too well together. She could see him throwing obnoxious comments Sarah's way, but unlike Pepper, Sarah didn't get flustered easily. She wouldn't let Tony get away with being a prick. He was probably terrified of Sarah, Pepper thought, laughing to herself.

"What about now? Do you two get along?"

"He is a good man, Pepper. Him and I… we have our moments. I sometimes still don't understand how you can handle living with him, but he really is one of the good guys."

"Yeah…", Pepper smiled absentmindedly. "He really is."

"He makes you very happy, Pepper. And after everything you have been through with men, it just felt good to see my baby sister being genuinely happy and content."

"I just wish I could remember what it used to be like. Everybody says that I was really happy with him… and I know this might sound weird… but I miss it. I don't even remember it, though. How can I miss what I don't remember?"

Sarah took her sister's hand, giving it a light squeeze. In a strange way, she did understand what Pepper was going through.

"I know there must be so many of those small, special moments for me and Tony. But I just can't remember them at all. It hurts.", Pepper whispered.  
"But listen, Pepper. You are getting another chance with Tony. He is still here, he's still fighting for you. Even thought you don't remember anything about the love you both share for one another. Tony is still right here fighting for your love."

Pepper nodded her head, biting the inside of her cheek in a nervous manner.

"Don't ever forget how lucky you are to have him still trying to woo you - to get you back."

"I want us to have another chance, Sarah… but it's not easy."

"I know that it isn't. Just make sure you don't close any doors on him, Pepper", her sister told her, her voice reassuring. "You can't even begin to imagine how much this man loves you."


	19. Chapter 19

**This is one of my favorite episodes! Hope you love it! Dont forget to Review!**

Pepper drove back to her mother's house early in the morning, hoping to sneak into bed before Janela would wake up and surely ask questions Pepper didn't feel like answering. It was barely seven o'clock, but sure enough her mother was sitting in the kitchen, sipping her steaming coffee. She raised an eyebrow but said nothing when Pepper entered the room. She felt like a teenager again. Yes, she had snuck out of the house on more than one occasion when she'd been barely 17. And it still felt just as embarrassing to get caught.

"Morning mom."

"Did you have a good time with Sarah?", her mother asked, her voice dripping with a sarcasm that was very unusual for Janela.

"Uhm… yes.", Pepper answered, noticing the tone of voice her mother was using, but unsure what to make out of it. "Exhausting."

"Oh yes, I'm sure.", she answered, a knowing smile slowly forming on her lips.

"Yep."

"Oh, Pepper, honey. You don't have to pretend around me. I might be old but I am not stupid. I know you didn't spent the night with your sister. So tell me, did anything happen between you two?"

Pepper looked at her mother. She was tired and exhausted and now also very confused.

"Something must have happened after you shared that kiss.", Janela smiled excitedly.

"Oh my gosh. Mom!", Pepper exclaimed, suddenly realizing what her mother had been talking about all along. "What's wrong with you people? You sound just like Sarah!"

For a moment Janela was sure that she must have insulted Pepper, but soon her daughter's infectious giggle rang through the room and she smiled, relieved.

"I was being serious, mom. I was with Sarah. I couldn't sleep and just needed somebody to talk."

"Oh. Really?"

"Yes, really, mom. Why do you sound so disappointed?"

"I was just hoping you had snuck out the house to spend the night with Tony."

"Well… I didn't.", Pepper blushed, suddenly well aware that she was getting dangerously close to discussing her love life with her mother. "I'm off to bed, okay?"

"Get some sleep, honey."

Janela kissed her daughter's cheek and left her to climb the stairs to her bedroom. Once she had closed the door, Pepper began to undress. She took off her pants and the sweater, remembering how she had left the pajama shirt on. With the blinds closed and the sun not fully up just yet, the room was still fairly dark and she fell into a deep slumber as soon as her exhausted body was comfortable under the covers.

When the doorbell rang five hours later, Pepper stirred but didn't wake up. Downstairs, her mother opened the door to find Tony standing there, holding a gorgeous looking bouquet of red roses and a white shirt that made him look like an angel. He smiled at her with his boyish charm, his eyes searching the room nervously.

"You didn't have to bring me flowers,Tony.", she laughed, ushering him into the house.

"Well… uhm… actually… they're for…"

"I know that they are for Pepper.", Janela smiled. "I'm just teasing you."

The obvious relief that showed on his face made her laugh. He rubbed the back of his neck and Janela shook her head, amused. She still found it funny how the man that was so over-confident on TV, could be easily reduced to a bashful, blushing boy - if only you knew how to get to him. She handed him a vase that she had gotten out of one of the kitchen cabinets for him and he filled it with water, before arranging the flowers lovingly. She didn't get to see this Tony often, though she knew that he charmed her daughter quite a bit - even after years of dating.

"Is she here?", Tony asked when he was satisfied with the dozen red roses in front of him.

"She's upstairs, but I think she's still sleeping."

Tony checked his watch, making sure that he had gotten the time right. Yes, it was indeed noon. And it was very unusual for Pepper to be asleep at this time of the day. He looked at Janela questioningly and she realized that he couldn't know how Pepper hadn't gone to bed until early in the morning.

"She was with her sister last night and only went to bed a few hours ago.", she explained.

"Oh…", Tony trailed off, disappointed.

"I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you go up there."

"Are you sure,Jane? I don't want to disturb her."

Pepper's mom nodded her head, hoping that she was right and her daughter would indeed be okay with Tony walking into her bedroom while she was sleeping. But Janela had promised herself that she would do anything to help Tony and Pepper to find a way back into each other's lives and hearts.

"I'll be running some errands now.", she smiled and Tony understood that it was her way of granting them some privacy.

Hesitantly, he followed Janela's advice and walked up the stairs, holding the large vase in his left hand. In front of Pepper's room, he stopped, his hand already raised to knock on the wooden door. Tony tried to decide if he should knock, which would most definitely wake her, or if he should just walk into the room quietly so she could just continue sleeping. If, however, she would wake up, he wasn't so sure that she would appreciate him sneaking into her room.

Finally, he twisted the handle carefully, hoping she wouldn't wake up and throw him right back out. He tiptoed into the room and shut the door quietly, before turning around to look at Pepper. The sight of her sleeping form was familiar, but it still made his heart leap. He hadn't seen her like this in so long. Her face was relaxed and the deep lines that nervousness and concern had left on her forehead, had evened out. She looked peaceful and calm. Pepper was laying on her side, her knees pulled up, the blanket snuggled under her chin.

He sighed, walking slowly over to the bed. The table by her bedside was small, but just big enough for the vase full of roses. He placed them there, re-arranging them for the hundredth time since he had bought them. He'd had plans for today. He'd planned how they would spend the day, hoping Pepper would agree to come with him. But now, as he watched her sleep soundly, Tony wondered if he should just leave her be. The last weeks had been a lot for her and especially the past couple of days must have been so very exhausting for her.

Kneeling down in front of the bed, Tony watched her shift slightly, and for a moment he was afraid that he had been too loud. She was such a light sleeper after all. When she didn't move again, Tony relaxed. A lock of her hair fell into her face and because it felt like the most natural thing to do, Tony reached out, pushing it back behind her ear. Pepper's eyelids fluttered and he froze, his hand not moving from its spot on her soft cheek. The way her bottom lip stuck out slightly in her sleep made him want to kiss her right there. Instead, he trailed his thumb over her bottom lip and her eyes opened lazily. This is what he had wanted to avoid - Pepper waking up, finding him staring at her. If he'd get lucky she would still speak to him, if not, he would probably be kicked out of her bedroom any minute.

"There's a strange man in my bedroom. I should be screaming for my mom now.", she said, her voice still sleepy.

He smiled. Apparently, he got lucky.

"What are you doing here?", Pepper asked, not moving to get up, his hand still resting on her cheek.

"I thought you would be awake by now. I didn't know that you were out and about all night long.", he winked.

"I was not.", she giggled. "I went to talk to my sister…"

"I know. I talked to your mum downstairs. Sorry for waking you up, love.

"It's okay. It's probably pretty late already anyway, huh?"

Tony nodded his head and watched as her eyes fell to the alarm clock on the bedside table. He knew exactly when she noticed the bouquet of roses, for her eyes shot to him, then back to the beautiful flowers. She covered his hand with her own on her cheek.

"Thank you. They're really gorgeous."

"Like you.", he smiled.

It wasn't the compliment itself that made her blush, but the sincerity in his voice and his eyes. She closed her eyes again, welcoming the kiss he placed on her forehead. She wouldn't have thought she'd ever hear an honest compliment from Tony, one that wasn't dripping with sarcasm and double meanings. It was easy to believe him now, that she was getting to know the 'new' Tony - the changed man.

"Sarah showed me the baby's things last night.", she confessed. "I told her we would pick them up and take them back to where they belong."

"You saw all of the things we bought?", Tony asked, afraid that it might have been a little too much, too soon.

"I actually only looked at the crib. I wanted to… well… look at the other things together with you. Some day."

"Okay. Would you mind if we pick them up tomorrow?", he asked with a soft smile. "I already made plans for us today. Kind of."

Her face lit up and she bit her lip. She liked this side of him too. The man in him, that took matters into his own hands, the kind of guy that wanted to spend all day with the woman he was trying to win over. Pepper enjoyed the attention, but more than anything she loved all the effort he seemed to put into making every day special for her. And for them together.

"What is it?", she asked, already feeling a little bit giddy.

"If you'd get your butt out of bed you might find out.", he teased.

Pepper stuck her tongue out childishly, throwing the covers back. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and got up. He got up along with her, when he suddenly realized that she was wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt, her panties showing under the white material. This is what he longed for, what he missed and craved. Her legs, gorgeous as ever, long and inviting to be touched. But Tony held himself back, knowing she would surely not appreciate it.

She hadn't realized her semi-naked state quite as fast as Tony and only when she followed his gaze did she realize what he was looking at. The crimson color rose quickly in her cheeks and she tried to pull the shirt as low as it would go. He'd seen her underwear, she was sure of that. And, God, she was embarrassed.

"I'm taking a shower.", she mumbled. "Wait downstairs."

Tony left the room, sniggering. She was adorable like this, all flustered and blushing in the deepest kind of red.

She found him sitting downstairs in the living room 45 minutes later, zapping through the channels on her mother's TV. She knew he wouldn't find anything that could keep his interest. Pepper just didn't think Tony was the kind of man that would enjoy the TV program of the early afternoon, especially if his favorite thing to do with a TV was to correct Discovery Channel.

"I'm ready.", Pepper announced, startling him.

Tony turned off the TV and turned around to look at her. Her jeans were black and tight and the shirt she had chosen was casual but very beautiful. It showed off all her curves and he liked every bit of it.

"Let's go then, love.", he told her, extending his arm to her.

"Where are we even going?", she asked him, once they had both settled into the car.

"That, my dear, is a surprise."


	20. Chapter 20

WOW! You guys are amazing! I think I had never gotten so many reviews, so thanks to all of you who wrote a comment. I want to thank **_Fantasia-49_**, for all your support, since the very beginning.

And **_Pati G W Black_**, I really don't know why I named Pepper's mom Janela, my best friend told me it was a cool name so I did it LOL! Anyways… Episode 20! So excited.

"Can you tell me now?", Pepper whined, getting impatient and irritated by the smirk that just wouldn't leave his lips.

"Nope. You'll have to wait till we get there, love."

She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest with an exaggerated sigh. They had been on the road for a good thirty minutes and he had yet to give her any kind of hint as to where they might be going. They had left Malibu by now and even though Pepper recognized the general direction they were taking, she had no idea where exactly they could be heading. Another ten minutes later and her impatience began to turn into annoyance slowly. When she was about to ask him again, the car slowed down and Tony pulled into a side road. Pepper looked at him with a raised eyebrow and he chuckled.

"Almost there."

Studying her surroundings, Pepper realized that they must have been getting close to a beach of some sort, for the road was slowly turning into a path of sand and gravel. Tony stopped eventually, turning his head to wink at her. Pepper shook her head, smiling nonetheless.

"Where are we?", she asked.

"The beach.", he told her, smiling cheekily.

"I can see that,Tony. But if you wanted to lay in the sun we could have done that in your porch, you have a private beach remember?."

"That's not why we're here, sweetheart. Come on." He answered.

Once they had gotten out of the car, Tony reached for her hand and she took it without hesitation. Some things still seemed to come naturally between them. Taking his hand when he offered it, was one of them. Losing herself in his brown eyes and the gorgeous smile was another. Pepper let him lead her down the small path, watching as the gravel under her feet slowly turned into sand. She stopped him and took her shoes off wordlessly, dropping them where she could pick them up on their way back later. She'd always loved to feel the sand between her bare toes and even though summer was over, the sun still warmed the tiny grains. Tony smiled as he noticed her toes curling, playing with the soft sand. He, too, took his shoes off, leaving them next to Pepper's.

They continued walking until the path turned into a small, gorgeous beach. They were alone, just as Tony had hoped they would. The waves were crashing softly in front of them and Pepper closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. It had always fascinated Tony how she could still enjoy the beach and the ocean so much, when it was all she'd ever known. Pepper never took anything for granted and he liked that about her. Fame and fortune had not taken away her ability to enjoy the simple things in life.

"It's beautiful here.", she told him. "I didn't even know this place existed."

"You actually brought me here a few years ago, before we started dating."

"Really? I don't remember ever being here before. But it really is gorgeous."

"I don't know how you ever found this place, but you brought me here when I was stressed out about some project not working out or something.", Tony explained. "You told me that this is the place I should go when I need to think, when I don't know what I want or what I should do."

She let his words sink in, wondering if they had a deeper meaning for him - and for them.

"Is this why we are here? Because you don't know what you want or what you should do?", she asked, staring out into the open water.

Tony brought a hand down upon her shoulder, turning her body until she was facing him, his finger under her chin gently forcing her eyes to meet his.

"I know what I want, Peps. And I know that I will do whatever it takes to get what I want. But in the end, it's up to you if my will is ever going to be fulfilled."

She knew that he wasn't trying to pressure her. She knew that the decision was hers to make, but it still seemed like an almost unbearable weight to carry on her shoulders. Between her own feelings and the desperate wish to make him happy, Pepper was afraid that her knees might buckle. That she might crumble under the weight, and that maybe, he might not be there to catch her.

"Why did you bring me here today?", she asked carefully.

"I wanted you to know that there is a place you can go to when you need to clear your head. A place where you can be alone without feeling lonely.", he sighed. "I like to believe that this is our place. And I know that sounds awfully cheesy."

"It doesn't.", she smiled. "Have we been back here after that first time I brought you here?"

"I know you have been here by yourself a few times over the years and I have too. The last time I came when you were still in the hospital."

"And together? Have we been here together at all after that one time?"

"Once.", he smiled almost shyly, and she knew immediately that they must not have come here to talk back then.

Pepper didn't need to hear more. She was slightly embarrassed already.

"When was that?", she asked anyway, cursing herself inwardly.

He laughed, remembering the day he had brought her to this beach. They had been fighting like cats and dogs at Stark Industries over some contract and hadn't stopped at home either. Tony had spent the night on the couch, hoping by the time they'd wake up in the morning, things would have calmed down. But when they had met in the kitchen, they'd picked up right where they had left off the night before. After yelling at each other for a good thirty minutes, Tony had ordered her to get into the car and to his utter surprise, Pepper had agreed, slamming the door of his precious vehicle with all her might.

"I can't believe you were actually able to convince me to go with you.", Pepper chuckled as he told her the story.

"To be honest, I couldn't believe it either."

"What happened once we got here, to this beach?", she asked, now curious to hear the end of his story.

"I told you we wouldn't move from the spot until you'd calm down and stop being a drama queen."

She gasped, hitting his arm playfully. Even years later, this still earned him a slap.

"Did we get over our fight? I mean, did it help that you brought us here?"

"You could say that.", he smiled.

"How? What happened?", Pepper asked, wrinkling her nose as excitement began to dance in his eyes.

"We have our way of getting past our fights, darling.", Tony answered, wriggling his eyebrows suggestively.

As usual, she didn't catch on to the meaning of his words right away. But the sparkle in his eyes and the way he pressed his lips together to keep from laughing out loud, finally gave him away.

"You have got to be kidding me!", Pepper exclaimed.  
She stepped away from him, hiding her face in her hands. For a moment Tony was afraid that she would be mad at him, but her small chuckle relieved him, telling him that she wasn't upset, probably just a bit embarrassed. He watched her walk closer to the small waves, until the cold water played around her feet. Following her, Tony didn't stop until he was right behind her, close enough to touch without actually doing so. Pepper felt his hot breath on her neck and it comforted her to know that he'd be there to welcome her into his arms if she'd seek his embrace.

"Do we always solve our troubles like this? I mean… how could we have … you know… done it here?", she asked. "People could have caught us."

"This is why we came here, love. Nobody would find us here and we needed to go somewhere where it would be just you and me."

"Yeah…", she whispered and he knew she had more to say, so he waited patiently until she was ready to continue. "I just… it seems like we always… you know…"

"What is it Peps? You know you don't have to be afraid to talk to me. Just say what's on your mind."

"It seems like we solve every problem by having sex.", she blurted out, wrapping her arms around herself.

Tony sighed, realizing that maybe he had - unintentionally - painted this picture in her mind. Cautiously, he wrapped his arms around her, feeling her body stiffen immediately. He didn't let go though, waiting for Pepper to relax, to lean into his embrace. Soon enough, her arms fell to her side, allowing him to hold her a little more tightly.

"We don't, Peps. We always talk. We fight and scream… well… you scream and we always find a way to get past our issues. But I'm not going to lie to you. We usually manage to include making love into it somehow, but you have to believe me. We're so much more than that."

She noticed how he chose the words 'making love' over 'sex' and it warmed her on the inside.

"What did we do after we… well… got done here?", Pepper asked, referring to their little sexual encounter they'd had on this beach.

Tony took a deep breath, pulling her small body tightly against his broad chest. Pepper closed her eyes and in a flash, she suddenly saw herself withTony. Her breath caught as she realized that she was having another flashback. Squeezing her eyes shut as tightly as possible, she tried to hold on to the memories that played in front of her mind's eye like a movie. She watched herself straddling Tony, her chest bare, the short skirt bunched up around her waist. This must have been them having sex right here, she realized, right at this very same beach. A burning heat crept through her body as she watched herself throw her head back, his name leaving her lips in a short, breathless panting.

"You okay?", Tony asked, and as soon as it had come, her flash of memories was over.

"What did we do?", she repeated her question and he noticed how low and hoarse her voice had become.

"I took you home.", he whispered into her neck. "I took you home and we spent the rest of the day cuddling and kissing."

She could see herself enjoying that - a day spent just laying around, lazily kissing each other. But she wouldn't have figured Tony to be the kind of man that would enjoy this. Pepper turned around in his arms until she was facing him. Her toes were getting cold from the water, but she wasn't ready to move away quite yet. He smiled her favorite smile and she returned it, her hands coming down to rest on his chest.

"Could we do that again?", she asked. "Could you take me home and we spend a day like that again?"

He smiled, snaking his arms around her waist. He was worried about pushing her too far, but the thought that had formed in his mind was already playing on his lips and before he knew it, he lowered his face to hers.

"I don't know.", he answered. "Maybe we would have to make love right now to be able to kiss and snuggle later."

"You think so?", Pepper breathed, her lips softly resting against his.


	21. Chapter 21

**You guys rock! Are you excited about my sexual cliffhanger? *wiggles eyebrows* HAHAHAHAHHAH just kidding guys.. **

"I don't know.", he answered. "Maybe we would have to make love right now to be able to kiss and snuggle later."

"You think so?", Pepper breathed, her lips softly resting against his.

"I do.", he whispered and she barely caught the words, her own heartbeat thrumming loudly in her ears.

Finally, he brought his lips down upon hers, her face held securely in his hand, the other one resting dangerously low on her back. His fingers tickled her gently just below her ear and the shudder going through her body made them both well aware of the effect the kissing was having on Pepper. Tony sucked on her bottom lip gently and when her mouth formed a soft 'o' with the small moan that she couldn't hold back, he used his chance to slip his tongue into her mouth. Her tongue played with his, the kiss slow and deep - more intimate than any of the kisses they had shared.

His lips moved over her chin and slowly along her jaw line. Pepper buried her hand in his thick, raven hair, her thumb caressing him along his hairline. Gently sucking the sensitive spot on her neck, Tony dared to pull her body closer against his own. She moved her head, carefully turning it to its side so he would have better access to her neck. She moaned quietly as he began sucking the soft skin of her neck, knowing that he'd leave a mark right there. Pepper didn't care though. If his desire for her was to leave love marks on her body, so be it.

"Love", she murmured and he sighed, realizing that she hadn't called him anything other than 'Tony' since she had woken up.

He trailed his free hand up and down the side of her body, brushing her breast with his thumb. Her stomach clenched in anticipation and lust, but also in fear and nervousness. She searched for his lips with her own, trying to become the one in control of their actions, when in reality, her body was working without her mind's permission. Tony allowed her to kiss him feverishly for a moment, before he pulled back slightly, their bodies still kept close.

"Pep…", he whispered, his own breathing as heavy as hers. "You don't know how much I want this… how much I want you…"

She wanted it too, she thought. Yet, she was scared senseless of taking this step. There would be no turning back if she'd sleep with him now. Would it be fair to him to give herself to him now, when she really wasn't sure about her own feelings at all?

"… but we shouldn't.", he whispered. "I don't want you to regret this when it's all over."

Pepper felt an odd mixture of disappointment and relief wash through her, her tense body relaxing against his. She was thankful for him making the decision, for she wasn't sure if she could have made the right one. Once again, she was struck by how much he had changed. Or maybe he'd never been the man she'd thought he was to begin with. Either way, Pepper enjoyed him being sweet and gentle with her. Above all, she enjoyed the love he was willing to give to her. So unconditional and true that it made her heart soar.

"Will you still take me home with you?", she asked, her face buried securely in the crook of his neck, arms wrapped around his waist.

He chuckled but she could tell that it wasn't because the situation was humorous. He was relieved, maybe just as much as she was.

"Come on. Let's go home,sweetheart."

They walked to the car hand in hand, picking their shoes up on the way. On the way back to the house they were quiet, both thinking about the earlier events, their time spent together at the beach. Soon, Tony brought his hand down to rest on her thigh - not low enough to be considered a friendly touch, but not high enough to make her feel the heat rise within her. He knew just where to touch her to make her feel comfortable and good. He knew her that well.

The drive back was a little longer than before but they managed to avoid most of the traffic. By the time Tony pulled the car into the driveway, the late afternoon sun was beginning to set and the air was a little chilly. Once inside the house, Pepper excused herself to the restroom and Tony was glad to have a moment to collect his thoughts. Part of him was glad that they had stopped before things had gone too far, but then again, he was also upset that they hadn't continue what might have ended in love making. He missed her. The touch, the feeling of her skin against his. The way she would speak his name so breathlessly when they were intimate with each other. He heard her footsteps from behind so he turned around, suddenly face to face with her again.

Pepper was just about to pull her sweater over her head and he watched, mesmerized, as her t-shirt began to slide up in the process. The skin of her belly looked as soft as ever and when her belly button came into view, his breath caught. Tony had seen and touched her so many times, that it shouldn't affect him as much. But it had been so long. As soon as the sweater was pulled over her head, Pepper adjusted her t-shirt hastily, knowing that he had probably seen her bare skin.

"It's getting kinda hot in here.", she smiled, blushing deeply.

"It sure is.", Tony winked and she cursed herself inwardly for her choice of words. "So… what's it gonna be, love? Cooking or going out for dinner? Your choice."

"How about Chinese take-out and a movie?", Pepper smiled.

"Thank goodness.", he laughed. "I don't feel like going out and I was so afraid you'd make me cook."

Pepper giggled, happy that their conversation was light and silly, that she didn't have to worry about what had almost happened. They agreed on an early dinner, hovering over the menu of their favorite Chinese restaurant together. Tony finally called in to order their food, while Pepper stood beside him, adding more to their meal as he spoke.

"I really can't wait to see you eat all that.", Tony chuckled as soon as he had hung up the phone.

"I'm starving!", Pepper exclaimed. "You just wait and see."

By the time their food arrived, it was almost completely dark outside. They ate in the living room, the small boxes of Chinese noodles and other goodies spread out on the table. Pepper watched him, amused by his inability to eat with chopsticks. How could someone so smart not be able to do something a lot of people could?

"I'm so full.", Pepper said, falling back against the couch, holding her stomach.

"You didn't eat your fortune cookie yet.", he told her and she smiled.

"I can still fit that in somewhere."

She opened the wrapper of the small cookie before breaking it in half carefully. Popping one half into her mouth, she unrolled the small message written on a tiny strip of white paper. She read it once, then again. Tony watched her expression turn serious, noticing how she'd closed her eyes briefly.

"What does it say?"

Pepper handed him her fortune and he read it silently. 'Happiness isn't something you remember, it's something you experience.' He smiled a little placing a kiss on her cheek.

"It's true.", he told her, placing the small piece of paper back into her hand.

He planned on making her experience such happiness that it wouldn't matter if she'd remember the happiness from days that were in the past. He wanted to give her enough of it to replace the missing memories with new ones.

"What does yours say?" Pepper asked, her head now resting against his shoulder.

"Those fortune cookie people are very smart. Do you think I could get a job like that? he asked.  
"Why? What does it say?" She chuckled.

"Love is on its way.", he read, holding the message up for her to see.

"Either smart or a bit overhasty.", she mumbled, earning a soft poke into her side.

She giggled, squirming under his touch. Tony poked her again, this time pinching her waist lightly. She tried to get away from him, squealing every time his fingers tickled her. He caught her wrist before Pepper got the chance to get off the couch, pulling her back into the large pillows. Hovering above her, his brown eyes bore into her, causing her to bite her bottom lip involuntarily. She could feel the weight of his body pressing her into the soft pillows gently, her hands caught in his, the grip he had on her light, but strong enough to hold her in place. Suddenly, she didn't want to get away from his touch any longer.

"You said there'd be kissing and cuddling.", Pepper smiled, almost shyly.

Tony chose not to answer her with words, instead he lowered his face to hers, pressing their lips softly together. He released her hands and she brought them around his neck immediately. No matter how heated the kiss from earlier had been, kissing him now, while he was laying on top of her, pinning her down on the couch, was a whole different story.

"The movie.", he said, his lips still attached to her neck.

They pulled apart and he marveled at her tousled hair and the way her lips turned a deep shade of red when they had been kissed. Tony sat up and pulled her with him. They readjusted themselves on the couch, before he pushed the play button for the Blu-Ray player, starting the movie they had chosen earlier. It was a typical Pepper-movie, but he didn't mind. A few minutes into the movie, Pep moved closer, leaning her head against his chest. Tony brought his arm around her shoulders, holding her closely - warm and protected. By the time the credits were rolling, Pepper's head was in his lap, her breathing soft and even. He pushed the hair out of her face, admiring her sleeping form. It was almost midnight now and he too, was tired.

Tony gently lifted her head, sliding is body out from under hers. He placed Pepper's head on a soft pillow, adjusting it until he was sure she'd be comfortable for the night. As soon as he had gotten up, he pulled a blanket around her, carefully tucking it under her chin so she'd stay warm. It was late and she was sound asleep. Not only did he not have the heart to wake her, Tony also liked the idea of having her in the house for the night. Even if she'd be down here, on the couch.

Placing a lingering kiss on her lips, he stood up. He went into the kitchen to dim the lights, but didn't turn them off completely. If Pepper would wake up in the middle of the night, he wanted to make sure that she'd be able to see where she was. He wondered briefly if it would scare her to wake up here, not expecting to be on the couch in their living room. Hoping she would be okay with it, Tony sighed, remembering the times when it had been perfectly natural to pick her up and carry her to bed. He took another look at her before taking the first step to climb the stairs to their bedroom.

"Can I come with you?", he heard her soft voice whisper.

Tony stopped, closing his eyes for a short moment.

"God, of course.", he breathed, as he turned around and found her standing right there. Then he extended his hand to her.


	22. Chapter 22

**Here it is! Enjoy! Lots and lots of Pepperony 3**

Pepper untangled herself from the soft blanket that had been draped over her body, leaving it on the couch. Taking small steps, she walked over to Tony, suddenly well aware of what she was about to do. Not only had she agreed to share a bed with him - she had actually asked for it. He was the one that allowed them to take things slow, to not rush into anything, because he knew how hard this was on her and how different her situation was from his. Tony knew what it was like to have her in his bed, he remembered. But to Pepper all this was new and the closer she got to Tony, the more nervous she seemed to get. Finally, she took his hand into hers and he smiled at her reassuringly. She followed him upstairs and into the bedroom wordlessly and when Tony let go of her hand she stood, awkwardly, waiting for him to tell her what to do.

Pepper's eyes widened as he began to unbutton his jeans, pulling them down his legs and dropping them on a chair carelessly. She realized that this was perfectly normal - he was just getting ready for the night after all - but it made her stomach clench and she couldn't decide if it was from nervousness or anticipation.

"That drawer over there…", Tony began, pointing to a small drawer on his left. "… that one is full of your pajamas."

She smiled a little, glad that she wouldn't have to sleep uncomfortably in jeans and a t-shirt. As she tried to decide on what to wear for the night, Tony walked into the adjacent bathroom to brush his teeth. Pepper stole a glance at his bare legs, his body now only covered by a t-shirt and ironman boxers. For a brief moment she wondered if he would take off his shirt as well and she bit her lip, smiling to herself. As soon as Tony escaped the bathroom, Pepper went in there to change. Less than ten minutes later she came out, finding him sitting in bed, looking up at her with a smile. The oversized pajama shirt went down to mid-thigh and when she moved, her black panties would peek out from under it. If he was being honest, Tony hadn't expected her to wear something quite as revealing, but he was not about to complain.

He lifted the covers, inviting her into their bed. She smiled but didn't look at him and he knew that it was because she would blush. When Pepper finally joined him on the bed, his eyes fell to her gorgeous legs again, the shirt not covering much. She loved it when he ran his hands up and down those thighs slowly, but he wasn't about to jeopardize his chance of spending the night in one bed with her by touching her inappropriately for their current situation. Pepper snuggled under the covers, staring at the ceiling to collect her thoughts and calm her racing heart. He remained quiet, giving her the time to get used to the situation.

Eventually, she turned her head, only to find Tony staring at her. The smile on his lips was quite dazzling, but his eyes were what really made her heart skip a beat. They were sparkling brightly, dancing excitedly all over her body. Pepper chose to take his hand into hers, the simple gesture her way of showing him that she was happy too.

"Good night, Tony.", she whispered.

"Good night.", he told her, leaning in for a soft kiss.

She looked adorably tired and Tony knew it would be one of those rare nights when she would just fall asleep, without battling against insomnia first. He watched her as she got comfortable, her eyes already closed. As much as she wanted to think about what exactly they were doing here, Pepper just couldn't. She was exhausted and couldn't be bothered with worrying about what her and Tony had become - what she was willing to let them become.

Just a few minutes later, he knew she was sound asleep. The small lamp on the bedside table was still on, but it didn't seem to bother her at all. Her features were relaxed and she looked peaceful. Tony admired her beauty for a moment, before he realized how big of a step they had just taken. There she was, in their bed - at last. So close, that he could easily hold her in his arms while they slept. So close, that he could press his body against hers, pretending nothing had changed.

When he was sure that Pepper had fallen into a deep sleep, he rolled over on his back, sliding a hand through his hair. Tony turned his head, staring at the tiny drawer of his bedside table. Once upon a time, not too long ago, he would have found cigarettes, a lighter and condoms in there. He smirked at the thought of the latter, remembering how he'd always made sure to have them there, even though with Pepper, he hadn't found much use for them. He had gotten rid of the last few in the small box when Pepper had told him that she was pregnant, because what they hadn't used before, had clearly been unnecessary then. The cigarettes had landed in the very same trash can on that very same day. There would have been none of that around his child.

Now, however, the sole purpose of this small drawer was something else entirely. Tony reached for its handle, pulling it open carefully so it wouldn't wake Pepper. This, after all, was something that he couldn't share with her, something she wasn't supposed to know about. Not now and if fate would be cruel, then maybe never. The drawer was empty, except for one small object. Tony took a hold of it, taking it out of its secret hiding place. The small black box felt heavy in his hands, even though the object it was holding was tiny.

He sighed, trailing a finger over the soft black velvet, before opening the box. The large, beautiful diamond was still as sparkly as ever and he knew that Pepper would love that. But this was not just a piece of jewelry, not just another shiny ring to adorn her finger.

It was a special ring. His to give to her. His symbol for the love he felt for her and for the future that he wanted to be theirs.

It was the ring he was going to give to her - when her accident had suddenly destroyed his chance.

Tony had been willing to take the step that he'd never thought he might even think about. With Pepper, though, it all made sense. Why wouldn't he want to spend the rest of his life with the woman that carried his child? The woman that he loved unconditionally.

In a way, it still made sense now, even though everything had changed - or maybe because things had changed. Tony was still willing to make her his wife. The question he couldn't find an answer to, was if Pepper would ever want to be just that.

He took a deep breath, placing the engagement ring back into the drawer. He closed it slowly, but the wood made a slight screeching noise against the metal and he cursed himself silently. Pepper stirred and he turned to lay on his back quickly, pretending to be asleep.

"You still awake?", she asked, sleepily.

Tony wanted to groan for being stupid enough to give himself away, but he refrained, answering with a soft 'yes' instead.

"Do I always sleep on this side of the bed?", Pepper asked.

"What?", he chuckled. "You don't like it?"

"No. It's perfect. I think I've always preferred this side, haven't I?"

"Not with me, you haven't."

"Really?", she asked, scrunching her nose.

"You usually prefer to sleep on top of me."

"Oh, shut up.", she giggled, hiding her blushing face in the pillow.

This, he could handle easily. Teasing her, making little jokes, being silly with her. It was so much easier than trying to analyze their future, when Pepper was struggling to piece together the past. In a way, Tony was almost glad that she had woken up, saving him from an hour-long battle against his own thoughts and doubts.

"Okay. Maybe you don't like sleeping on top of me, but you do like it when I hold you at night."  
"How would you hold me?", Pepper whispered shyly.  
He, too, smiled, opening his arms for her. Pepper inched closer slowly until their bodies were as close as possible without actually touching. Tony draped an arm over her small frame, pulling her into him. She felt their bare legs touch under the covers and she curled her toes as the chills began to run up and down her spine. Pepper was sure that he could feel her heart racing as it thrummed mercilessly against his chest. Her head was resting right next to his arc reactor and he kept placing tiny kisses on her forehead. She brought her hand down to rest on Tony's waist and for the shortest of moments, she felt him stiffen under her feather-light touch.

Tony's hand began rubbing her back in slow circular movements and as much as it was relaxing, it was just as tantalizing. With every stroke of his fingers, he moved a little lower. Pepper knew that her shirt had slid up slightly, no longer covering any part of her lower body. The panties she was wearing suddenly felt so small and in a way she felt as if she had exposed herself to Tony. Yet, it never even occurred to her to cover herself. She'd rather stay still in his loving embrace.

"This is how you like to fall asleep.", he told her.  
Pepper lifted her head to smile and him, but found herself being taken aback by the sight of him. His eyes were dark, their deep brown color now almost black. She began to slide her fingers over his hipbone subconsciously, losing herself completely in his intense gaze. He leaned down to nuzzle his nose against hers, their hot breaths mingling.

"Get some sleep, my love.", Tony whispered, his voice so hoarse that it was barely there.

"I don't want to sleep.", she replied, and he was sure his heart must have skipped more than just a single beat.

Tony had counted on her falling back asleep, giving him the opportunity to calm down, to stop thinking about her body pressed against his. If she'd stay awake though, looking at him with those beautiful blue eyes, he didn't know if he could control himself. He was only human after all. And madly in love, too.

He allowed himself to kiss her soft lips, closing his eyes tightly. She sighed, a low sound that took his breath away. Their lips moved slowly, in sync with each other and it wasn't long before Pepper felt him trace her bottom lip with his tongue, seeking entrance to her waiting mouth. They kissed passionately for a long time, his hand pressing her body firmly against his. When he moved his lips to her neck, Pepper found the bravery to slip a hand under the back of his shirt, trailing her fingers up his bare skin. His hot breath tickled her sensitive skin when he moaned softly into her neck.

She knew what she wanted. She knew what they needed. But Pepper was so nervous, so afraid of everything that would change. She'd always been an emotional person, but never had she been so overwhelmed by her feelings.

Fear and nervousness. Lust and desire. And something else that she couldn't seem to find a word for. Something so powerful that it consumed every fiber of her being, so deep and strong that it made her heart soar.

Something that made her decision so easy all of the sudden.

"I don't want to sleep tonight, Tony."

**BAM! I love sexual cliffhangers HAHA. BTWJust to clear any confusion... the ring that appears in this chapter is the actual wedding ring, not the engagement ring (it was lost at the accident) **


	23. Chapter 23

**I DID IT! A lot of you asked so here it is! ****Ready for some Pepperony action?! hahah enjoy! **

Tony pulled back to be able to look at her, trying to read her expression. Trying to make sure that he understood her intentions, that he wasn't just hearing what he wanted to hear. He pushed her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. Her hand on his back had stilled, his skin warm where she had left it. Her lips were a brighter shade of red, now that they had kissed, her eyes however, were much darker. Her foot found one of his and she began to slowly trail it up his leg. If he had doubted Pepper's intentions before, he no longer did. Tony's breath caught as he realize that this was the moment that he had waited for all this time.

"Are you sure?", he whispered, stroking her soft cheek.

Pepper nodded her head 'yes', suddenly sure that her voice wouldn't form a single word if she tried to speak. She studied his handsome face, watching as a smile formed on his lips. His eyes bore into hers - deep and full of unspoken emotions. Right then, she knew that she was loved. It was the reason she'd willingly give herself to Tony.

He pushed her back into the pillows gently until Pepper was laying on her back. Resting on his side, Tony draped a leg across her lower body, softly pinning her down on the bed. She took a hold of his shirt, pulling him closer until their lips finally met again. Tony began to nibble on her bottom lip, waiting for her to allow him entrance to her mouth. When she parted her lips slightly, he slipped his tongue in, meeting hers half-way. He kissed her, long and slow, words unnecessary and insufficient at the moment. Carefully, Tony moved his body on top of hers, his masculine weight pressing her into the sheets softly. His fingers began to run along her hipbone, then slowly up her side. Pepper wrapped an arm around his body, pulling him down to her until his chest was pressed against hers. She could feel his arousal, straining his boxers as he rubbed himself ever so slightly against her thigh.

"Pepper…", he groaned, when she began to pull up his shirt.

He waited until she had brought it up to his shoulders, before he reached for its hem, pulling it over his head quickly. Pepper allowed herself to stare at his bare chest with the reactor in the middle, his broad, muscular body making her feel safe, and protected. Tony began to kiss down her neck, nibbling on the exposed part of her collarbone. She moaned quietly, fueling his desire for her gorgeous body even more.

"Can I take this off?", he asked, his hands tucking on the hem of her large t-shirt.

"Yeah…", she breathed.

Tony sat down beside her, helping her out of her shirt. He stared at her body, now almost completely exposed to his intense gaze. Pepper closed her eyes, biting the inside of her cheek hard. Tony had bedded many gorgeous women in his life - she didn't have to remember the past year to know that much. She wasn't like them, not in her own eyes, at least. For a moment she wondered how he had ever chosen her, when Tony could clearly have the most beautiful women around.

"Look at me.", he pleaded and she felt the bed shift as he came to lie next to her again.

Pepper opened her eyes reluctantly, not looking at him. His hand came down upon her cheek and he turned her head so she'd have to face him. Tony caressed her cheek for a while, smiling.

"You'll never understand how incredibly beautiful you are, will you?"

She blushed, but smiled nonetheless. Maybe she would never be able to actually believe it, but she would let herself enjoy his compliment - because she knew he was being sincere, that he actually did think she was beautiful. Tony moved closer to kiss her full lips again, her little sighs of appreciation giving him chills. He trailed his hand from her face slowly down her neck and along her arm, tiny goosebumps rising on the soft skin beneath his fingers. Once he reached her small waist, Tony pulled her body into his, finally skin to skin with her. Pepper moaned quietly, her nipples suddenly hard and tantalizing against his chest. Her face was hidden in his neck, every breath she took, setting his skin on fire. As she began to kiss his neck lovingly, Tony moved his hand down her leg until he reached her knee. He slipped his hand between her thighs and Pepper opened them ever so slightly, giving him just enough room to caress the inside of her legs.

"You feel so good.", he told her and she grasped his broad shoulders a little more tightly.

Her lips began to wander across his throat and along his collarbone, his masculine scent robbing her of all ability to think any longer. Tony's hand trailed up her leg painfully slowly and she spread her thighs just a little more. When he finally reached her panties, he traced their outline teasingly, not touching her where she needed it. Pepper moaned into his chest and in a sudden flash, she saw herself from above, Tony's head buried between her thighs. She could hear herself calling his name in a breathless voice, before she cried out, three little words leaving her lips in a low moan.

Another flashback, she thought, tears brimming behind her closed eyelids. It wasn't so much what she'd seen them doing that made her this emotional now, but listening to herself tell him that she loved him, was overwhelming. Tony's touch brought her back into the here and now, his fingers so close to where she needed them.

"Please.", she whispered, her hand running down his back sensually.

Finally, Tony placed his fingers against her sex, feeling her warmth through the thin fabric of her panties. Pepper pushed her hips against his hand, gasping for air. He trailed a finger up and down very slowly, feeling every part of her. She'd always been the only woman that could make him absolutely crazy with want, but he couldn't remember ever longing for her quite as much.

Pushing her down to lay on her back once again, Tony got in between her spread legs, kissing her feverishly. She could feel his arousal pressing against her wet center through the fabric of their underwear and she almost wanted to tear them off - to feel him without anything between them. Instead, Pepper pushed her fingers past the waistband of his boxers, caressing the skin of his behind. She felt him tense under her touch, his moans bouncing off her swollen lips. She allowed him to move lower, kissing her breasts lovingly, until finally teasing her nipples, his tongue drawing lazy circles around them.

"Oh Tony…", she whimpered and his heart began to soar.

She was writhing beneath him, the sight of her flushed face and tousled hair making his member almost painfully hard. As he kissed down her belly, Pepper took a hold of his thick hair, pressing his face a little closer to her heated skin. He kissed the bit of soft skin just above her panties and she groaned, her hips rising from the bed.

"Off…", she moaned and Tony knew she wasn't asking him to get off of her.

He looked up at her, breaking contact with her lower body for a short moment. She felt his eyes on her, so she opened her own, meeting his gaze. Tony was holding her by the hips and she brought one hand down to cover his, giving it a light squeeze.

"Are you sure?", he asked, praying that she wouldn't change her mind.

"Yeah… take them off… please."

He smiled, realizing that she made him nervous. After all those years, she made him so incredibly nervous. Her panties slid down her slim legs effortlessly and once he reached her feet, Tony pulled them off and tossed them to the floor.

There she was.

Finally.

More gorgeous than he had remembered, her whole body glowing.

He kissed her ankle, before slowly trailing small, feather-light kisses up her legs. Pepper spread them wider, encouraging him to move closer to her centre. When he was almost there, Tony stopped to look up at her. She met his eyes immediately, her hand reaching out to caress his cheek. He smiled too, before leaning in to place his lips against her wet womanhood. Pepper's hips bucked off the bed and he held her down gently, kissing her again. She watched him through half-lidded eyes, her whole body responding to the love he was giving her. Tony placed one last kiss on her clit, before continuing his path up her body. She whimpered at the loss of his lips on her wet center, already missing the unique feeling of being with him like this - of allowing herself the pleasure of letting him love her.

As soon as their faces were level again, she kissed him with a new found passion. Tasting herself on his lips was intoxicating and suddenly she knew that she wanted him inside of her. She needed him, his passion and love. She carefully raked her nails down his back, before grasping his boxers. In one swift motion she had taken them off, leaving him just as exposed as her. The very tip of his member began to press against her waiting sex and she slammed her eyes shut, expecting him to enter her. He didn't move though, leaning into to whisper in her ear.

"I want you so badly.", he breathed and within a second Pepper found herself looking at them from above again.

She could see him above her, a nervous smile on his lips. She watched as he brought an arm under her back, pulling her body as close as possible to his own, before finally sliding into her. 'I've wanted this for so long.' - she could hear him whisper, 'I finally have you with me.' This, she decided, must have been their fist time together. Pepper opened her eyes, her expression a mixture of too many emotions, too many for him to decide what she was feeling right now.

"Are you okay, love?", Tony asked her, concerned that she'd realized she wasn't ready after all.

"Hold me the way you did back then.", she told him, her voice hoarse from both arousal and tears that she was holding back.

"What?", he whispered, cradling her face in his hand lovingly.

"Please, Tony… hold me the way you did when we… when we first… made love."

"You remember?", he asked incredulously and to her utter surprise, tears began to form in his eyes too.

Tony wasn't one to cry easily and this was a situation she'd never imagined him to get so emotional over. She had always been like that - in every emotional situation she was close to tears, usually unable to hold them back. Now, his dark eyes were shiny, the tiny, salty droplets of water brimming there, ready to spill over any moment. She knew how hard he was working on holding them back.

"I remember just a little moment… but I… Tony… I want to remember more of us. I need you to help me remember."

He pressed his forehead against hers and before she could bring her lips to his, a few tears escaped his eyes, wetting her cheeks and his. Pepper wiped his eyes carefully, her lips finally finding his in a sweet, loving kiss.

"Make me remember.", she pleaded, pulling up her knees, forming a cocoon for his body.

Tony lifted his head to be able to watch her face and ever so slowly, he slid into her. She gasped, from pleasure or pain, he couldn't tell, so he stopped, stilling inside of her. He watched Pepper trying to catch her breath for a moment, before she raised her hips, taking him in deeper. He groaned, sliding an arm around her waist and under her back, holding her the way he had years ago.

Finally, he pushed all the way in, filling her completely. He gave her time to adjust to his size, before they began to move together - their bodies in unison with the other. Her moans filled the room, her whole body shuddering and writhing in his arms.

"Oh God…", Pepper moaned breathlessly. "Oh… Tony… I…"

"Remember this, my love? Remember how good you make me feel?", Tony asked in a husky voice. "Only you…"

"Deeper…", she breathed, and he didn't hesitate to push into her, connecting their bodies as deeply as he could.

She threw her head back, tightening around him. Tony forced himself to re-open his eyes, watching how she came for him, moaning his name over and over again. It all became too much and he dropped his head into the crook of her neck, finally letting go as well. Pepper felt him spill himself into her and she didn't think she'd ever felt so complete, so loved and appreciated. She let him rest against her as he tried to regain control over his shaking body, his breath still heavy, his whole being exhausted but happy. Pepper stroked his back, calming him.

"Do you remember how good we are together?", he suddenly asked and she kissed the side of his face. "Remember how much I love you?"

**So what did you guys think? Leave a comment below!**


	24. Not a chapter!

**GUYS THIS ISNT A CHAPTER**

I just wanted to ask you guys how you would feel about Tony's mother still being alive? Howard needs to be dead, for the whole characterization of Tony, but no fanfic ever mentions his mother and I kinda wanted to turn this story into something new that no one has ever done... so leave a comment so I can post the new chapter!


	25. Chapter 25

She held him closer, suddenly completely overwhelmed by what they had just done and by what he had asked her. Tony began to pull back when he noticed her shaking with quiet sobs, but she wouldn't allow him to. His body pressed against hers, still connected, still buried deep within her. She needed this. Needed him.

Pepper couldn't let him go just now and when he realized how tightly she was holding on to him, he sighed, rolling them to their sides carefully. He brought his arms around her body, his movements slow and careful so he wouldn't slip out of her just yet. He tucked her head under his, rubbing her back as he let her cry into his chest.

"I love you.", he whispered once and she shivered in his embrace. "I love you. I love you…"

With each word Tony placed a kiss on her forehead, until finally, Pepper lifted her head to meet his lips. They kissed, long and soft, slow and full of unspoken emotions. Tony moved them a little, his now soft member sliding out of her in the process. She whimpered quietly, longing for him to be inside of her again. She had felt such completion with him, that it felt frightening to think about him pulling away from her.

"Make me remember…", she cried softly, repeating her words from earlier.

It broke his heart how badly she wanted to be able to recall their relationship, their love for one another and to think that she might never do so, hurt him just as much as it hurt her.

"When we made love for the first time, I felt like my whole world had just been turned upside down.", he began and she stared up into his moist eyes, listening intently. "I've slept with enough women to be sure I had done it all, had felt the most amazing highs, but I couldn't have been more wrong, love."

He caressed her cheek and kissed the tip of her nose, before he continued telling her about their first time.

"You felt so soft, so incredible that I was afraid that my experience with women wouldn't be enough to do your gorgeous body justice. I was so nervous…", he confessed and she smiled, her hand caressing him low on his back. "Afterwards, we lay in bed like this, just holding each other, kissing, talking. It was the most amazing feeling to be able to finally hold you in my arms."

She let him hold her for hours, listening to the stories he would tell her, slowly piecing their life together. Pepper didn't remember any of the things he mentioned, but in a way, she didn't even mind. Everything he shared with her seemed somewhat familiar and after a while she no longer blushed as he began to tell her about the more intimate times of their relationship. Pepper listened - mesmerized by his expressive eyes and the low, husky voice - when he described the night they couldn't even make it home, ending up on her dressing room floor instead. She giggled when he mentioned his birthday party where everybody got a little tipsy. She got teary-eyed when Tony told her about taking her to his father's grave for the first time, and she cried openly when he told her how much she meant to his mother.

"She called the other day, you know. My mom, I mean."

"Is she doing okay?", Pepper asked, feeling strangely connected to the woman she didn't remember at all.

"She is fine, yes. It's just… never mind."

"No, tell me. What's going on, Tony?"

"She really wants to come visit. She's been so worried about you and even though I have told her countless times that you are doing good, she wants to see it for herself. You are just very important to her."

"I think I want to meet her, Tony.", she whispered.

He studied her face, noticing the soft, barely visible sadness in her eyes. Tony realized that it was very hard on her, knowing that there were people that had become a part of her life, people that loved her dearly, even though she had no memory of them. But he knew his mother well, and seeing Pepper again wasn't her only reason for wanting to come to Malibu. It had hurt Maria, too, to learn about the loss of her unborn grandchild and now she felt like she should be there for her son, when he was still struggling with the miscarriage. The subject rarely came up when they talked over the phone, maybe because Tony tired his hardest not to speak about it. He'd love for his mother to come visit, but then again, the thought almost scared him. Maria was a wise woman and if she'd be there, she would be able to see right through him. She'd see his pain and sadness, but she'd also see the hope in his eyes. If he was being honest with himself, Tony was a bit weary of his mother joining him and Pepper. He wouldn't be able to hide any of his feelings around her.

"Are you sure? Is it not too early?"

"Honestly? I don't know, but I really want to get to know her. It seems like we get along so well…"

"You really do. She adores you so much.", he smiled.

Pepper giggled, poking him just below his belly button. He squirmed laughing with her, before the laughter got caught somewhere deep in his throat. She smiled at him, almost wickedly, trailing her finger lower. Tony watched in amazement as she licked her lips, her hand disappearing between his thighs.

She gave him the time of his life, the most amazing night he could imagine, and Tony returned the favor. Hours later, they found themselves wrapped up in the other's arms again - spent and deliriously happy. He admired the large bruise on her neck, feeling almost victorious for marking her as his. He wouldn't feel quite as victorious once Pepper would find out how big of a hickey he had given her.

"If I can't walk tomorrow, it's all your fault."

Tony laughed heartily, a deep belly laugh, that made her giggle as well. Right now, he wasn't so sure that he'd be able to walk, but he wasn't about to tell her that.

"That good, huh?", he teased, squeezing her behind playfully.

"I didn't say it was any good, did I?", Pepper asked innocently, causing him to pinch her butt.

"Oh, I see, you always scream like that, when it's no good at all…"

"I didn't scream.", she mumbled, hiding her blushing face in his broad chest.

"You screamed, my love.", he whispered teasingly. "So loud, I'm sure the neighbors could hear you."

"Oh my God, Tony.", she gasped. "Don't even say that!"

He couldn't help but laugh again at the mortified expression on her face. Her cheeks were bright red from embarrassment but her eyes were sparkling. He had always found her the most beautiful when she was like this.

"Shower?", Tony asked finally, sighing.

"Would I have to move and be able to stand upright for more than a minute?"

"Bathtub?", he tried again, smiling.

"Yes, please."

He left her in the tousled sheets of their bed while he began to get a hot bath ready for the both of them. Pepper watched his naked body disappear into the bathroom and as soon as she was alone, she took a deep breath. She pushed her sticky hair out of her face and closed her eyes briefly. It hit her all at once and she didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She had just spent the most amazing night with Tony, having the best sex of her life. Nothing about this should feel wrong, they were a couple after all.  
Then again, they weren't really. It was all too confusing and Pepper almost didn't want to have to think about it all. It didn't really feel wrong, she realized, it just seemed to make things a little more complicated. Maybe, he would expect her to move in with him now. Maybe he'd think that things were back to normal, that everything was the way it used to be before her accident.

It wasn't though, not to Pepper at least. Deep down, she wished that she could just let herself fall - head first and without ever looking back. But her past was haunting her, the unknown and forgotten moments covering her like a heavy blanket that she couldn't seem to lift. She wanted them to have a chance, no doubt about that, but she wasn't sure if she wouldn't be too afraid to actually give him that chance.

"Do you need me to come carry you?", he called from the bathroom.

She sighed, smiling to herself. A warm feeling spread deep within her, while the goosebumps formed on her skin. Maybe this was why he deserved every chance in the world. If he could make her feel like that, then maybe she shouldn't be so worried about loving him.

"I'll manage.", she replied, hearing him chuckle.

Pepper crawled out of bed, carefully standing on her wobbly legs. She was already sore, deliciously so.

Once she reached the bathroom door, she stood there, watching him light a couple of candles around the large tub. He was working so hard on winning her over once again, she realized that now. Everything he did, seemed to have only one reason: He wanted her to be with him again. There were so many things to be taken into consideration though - not only her feelings and his, but their families' too. Maybe she shouldn't have made this about them too, when it really was just a decision for Pepper and Tony to make, but she couldn't help herself.

It was important to her what his mother thought. Pepper felt like in a way, she needed the approval of Maria before she could even think of giving her relationship with Tony another chance. He'd told her that his mom loved her and she believed him, but deep down she wasn't sure that she still would now, after everything that had happened.

In her mind, they might have been reluctant towards her now, that she had changed so much - now that she was a Pepper they didn't know, one she hardly knew herself. Maybe his mother wouldn't adore her now, that she had lost the grandchild Maria had been waiting to welcome into her family for so long. Pepper felt her chest tighten as the thoughts kept flooding her mind mercilessly.

"Ready?", Tony asked, extending a hand to her.

She looked at him bewildered, almost as if he had woken her from a deep sleep.

"I need to meet your mom.", she told him matter-of-factly. "I have to see Maria."


	26. Chapter 26

Three days later Pepper found herself pacing back and forward between the bedroom and its adjacent bathroom, trying to decide what she should wear. She had clothes spread out on the bed, more of them had been dropped carelessly on the floor. She knew that she was being overly nervous but she couldn't help herself.

In less than an hour she would meet Tony's mother.

She pulled yet another shirt over her head, checking herself in the mirror. She actually liked it - the first outfit that seemed to somewhat please her today. Then she noticed the small but noticeable make-up stain on its collar and she huffed angrily. Pepper pulled the shirt back off, throwing it across the room. Angry tears suddenly threatened to fall and she stomped her foot, mad at herself. Just a few hours ago she had been happy that Maria had been able to come so soon, only a couple of days after Tony had called to tell her that they'd be happy to have her visit. Now, however, she was so scared to meet her that she felt physically sick.

She stood there, wearing nothing but a black lacy bra and matching panties. Her hands were trembling and when she looked at herself in the mirror, she could see her black mascara beginning to smudge slightly. Pepper wiped another angry tear away, willing herself to stop freaking out.

His hands were around her waist before she had even heard him enter the room and while he startled her for a moment, Pepper relaxed quickly, leaning back into him. Tony held her tightly, torn between trying to give her comfort and losing himself in the sensation of her almost naked body. Every night for the past few days, she had stayed in their house, slept in their bed, but they had not been intimate again. Pepper had kissed him and he had caressed her bare back, she had fallen asleep in his arms and he had woke her up with feather-light kisses down her neck. But apart from that, nothing had happened and they hadn't talked about their passionate night either.

"You feel better now?", Tony asked after a while, his arms still wrapped around her body.

"Yeah… I'm sorry."

"No need to be, love. I know that you are nervous to meet mom and believe it or not, I am too."

She smiled, wondering if he really was nervous or if he was just trying to make her feel better. Either way, she found it sweet.

"I don't have anything to wear.", she mumbled and he laughed out loud, turning their bodies for her to see the large amount of clothes scattered everywhere.

"I can tell.", he chuckled and Pepper blushed, realizing that she must have gone through over twenty outfits by now. "This dress over there…", he told her, pointing to a long-sleeved dress with a beautiful flower print, "… that's the one you should wear."

She didn't question his choice, happy that he had made it for her. Less than ten minutes later Pepper was dressed and the make-up was fixed. She smiled at him relieved, and Tony kissed her lips quickly. He took her by the hand as they went downstairs, him settling on the couch comfortably, her unable to sit still at all.

"You know, if you keep this up you won't have to worry about meeting mom. You'll have passed out by the time she gets here."

Pepper shot him a glare, one that told him to better not say another word. He returned to sipping his water, smiling to himself. He did feel bad for her and he would have loved to be able to calm her down, but he also couldn't help but find the humor in the situation. After all, Pepper was adorable when she got this nervous and flustered.

The doorbell rang not long after and his head shot up, meeting her gaze.

"Crap…", she whispered, but he caught her reaction, chuckling inwardly.

"Mom's gonna love how excited you are to see her.", Tony teased, earning a light slap from Pepper. "Seriously, darling, she loves you like a daughter and this will not have changed. Don't worry, okay?"

She nodded her head, leaving him to go and open the door for his mother. She watched as they greeted each other happily, the excitement in Tony's voice and the bright smile on his face warming Pepper's heart.  
"Come in, mom.", he smiled, leading Maria into the house.

Pepper stood there, watching them nervously, twisting the ring on her finger repeatedly. When Maria saw her, the smile on her face grew bigger still and she let go of her son's hand. She quickly made her way over to her son's girlfriend - or what she hoped to be his girlfriend - still, again or soon to be, she didn't quite know.

"Pepper, my dear. Oh, I am so happy to see you, darling."

Maria took the younger woman into her arms and as much as Pepper had expected it all to feel weird, forced even, nothing like this seemed to be happening now. She felt warm and welcome in Maria's embrace, familiar and comforted. Pepper allowed herself to hug her back, holding on to Tony's mother. When they pulled apart, she was almost certain that she could see tears in Maria's eyes, but she chose not to dwell on her reaction.

"It's good to see you, too… Mrs… uhm…", Pepper began, but stumbled over her own words, unsure of what to say.

"Maria will do just fine.", Tony's mother smiled, almost a little sadly, noticing how Pepper didn't really know what to call her.

There was a moment of awkward silence, but Tony broke it quickly, wrapping an arm around both of his women. They smiled up at him and he felt a special kind of happiness, that kind he only ever felt when he was with the people he really, truly loved.

"Are you hungry, mom? We should have some lunch."

"Actually, I am quite knackered from the long flight. I think I will rest for a bit. Perhaps we could have a late lunch in a while?"

"Of course. Come on, I'll take your bags up. You know which room will be yours."

"Thank you, dear.", Maria smiled, patting her son's back.

She let Tony go ahead and waited for him to disappear into the guestroom. Only when he was out of sight did she turn to Pepper again, smiling at the way the usually so amazing personality seemed to be hidden under the shyness she now felt. Maria grabbed her hands, squeezing them tightly.

"It's good to see you here with us, darling. We wouldn't have known what to do… if we… if we would have… lost you."

Pepper watched her shake her head, as if to get rid of those horrible thoughts. She almost felt like giving Tony's mother another hug, but couldn't quite bring herself to be so forward. Maria, however, reached out to touch Pepper's cheek, in a way that only a mother does.

"I'll go rest for a bit.", she finally spoke, squeezing Pepper's hand one last time.

When Maria came back downstairs a few hours later, she found her son sitting outside on one of the lawn chairs right next to the pool. Pepper sat comfortably between his legs, her back resting against his chest. They had a thin blanket draped over the both of them and he was playing with her fingers. It didn't appear as if they were engaged in a conversation, but Maria was still reluctant to interrupt them. She knew how fragile their relationship was right now, and how hard Tony tried to win Pepper's heart once again. They needed every moment together, no matter how seemingly unimportant. Maria sighed, her thoughts turning to Howard – the love of her life. She wondered if he would have done what Tony was doing now - choosing the difficult, the painful way, choosing to fight. Yes, he would have. She didn't doubt that at all. Tony was so much like his father, especially now, that he was getting older and obviously wiser.  
One of Pepper's small dogs started barking excitedly, running around Maria's feet. The fury little thing that Pepper considered her baby, caught the attention of both Maria and the cuddling couple outside. As she began to pat the dog's little head, Tony and Pepper made their way back inside, holding each other's hand subconsciously.

"I see the monsters have found you.", Tony chuckled.

"Only this one so far.", Maria smiled. "I'm sure the rest is on its way."

"Did you get some rest?", Pepper asked softly, still feeling awkward to be part of a conversation between Tony and his mother.

She couldn't quite decide if she belonged, if she should be part of it all.

"Yes, dear. I feel much better now. Starving actually."

"I'll order us something.", Tony decided.

"Actually, I am craving the pasta from this Italian place you took me to the last time I visited. I'm sure they don't deliver."

Tony was about to protest, ready to tell his mom that they did indeed deliver, that all it would take was a call. But then he caught her gaze, insistent and piercing and he got the hint. She obviously wanted him to leave the house for a little bit.

"You're right.", he smiled. "I'll go pick something up for all of us."

Pepper felt hesitant when Tony closed the front door behind him, leaving her alone in the house with Maria. His mother was smiling at her warmly, allowing Pepper to relax just a little bit. They both took a seat in the kitchen and for a moment, neither of them spoke.

"Be honest with me, darling.", Maria began suddenly. "How are you?"

"I'm good.", Pepper sighed. "I'm okay."

"It's nice of you to try and make me feel better, but Pepper… I want to know how you're really feeling."

Pepper looked into the older woman's eyes, finding nothing but warmth and comfort in them. She could already tell why Tony would adore his mother so much. Maria was such a lovely person to be around and without ever even thinking twice about it, Pepper found herself pouring her heart out.

"I'm confused… and… and scared… and I'm happy, yet sad. I'm just overwhelmed and I don't know what I'm doing. I feel so guilty and I hate that this had to happen to me and to Tony, too… I just want everything to be the way it used to be… I'm just…"

"Pepper! Pepper, dear… stop.", Maria interrupted her, taking both of Pepper's hands into her own. "Do not blame yourself! None of this is your fault at all, it was an accident, Pepper."

"He's trying so hard and I… I don't know what I am doing. I'm so afraid I'll end up hurting him even more.", Pepper continued, her tears not far now. "He's been hurt so much already. I mean… I don't even remember ever being with him and I lost his baby… I lost your grandchild… I don't know how you all still want me to be around."

"Pepper!", Maria stopped her yet again, this time more forcefully. "We all love you dearly, especially Tony. Please don't put this weight on your shoulders, it'll suffocate you. We all wish you would have never lost this baby… but you can't worry about everybody else when really it's you that is suffering the most. I know you are hurting, darling… I know what it feels like."

It took Pepper a moment to understand the meaning of Maria's words, but when she did, she let her tears escape her eyes.

"You… you know what it's like to lose your child?", she whispered hesitantly.

"I do.", Maria swallowed. "And I can't take away the pain you feel, but I can promise you that it will get better, especially when you are not alone. He'll stand by your side throughout this, Pepper. I truly believe that."

"I know he will.", she assured Tony's mother. "I don't know if I could get through it alone."

"You can't. Don't try to handle all this by yourself, darling. Let him be there for you…"

She nodded her head, smiling slightly as Maria reached up to wipe Pepper's tears away.

"You seem close…", Maria tried tentatively. "Almost… as if you…", she trailed off, not wanting to ask anything too private.

"He makes me feel so safe.", Pepper admitted, blushing. "I… enjoy being with him."

The color in her cheeks got darker still, and Maria smiled knowingly. She recognized that glow in Pepper's eyes. She'd seen it in Tony's earlier.

"I just want you both to be happy.", she said, patting Pepper's hand.

Pepper smiled, no longer considering her words as she spoke them.

"Thank you, mom."


	27. Chapter 27

**Im glad you guys are still enjoying this FF! **

Tony stared at the women from afar, almost dropping the bags of food as he watched them. He had left them alone for less than an hour, but when he had walked in the door Pepper had clearly been crying, his mom looked like she might be very close to it now and if his ears weren't playing a cruel trick on him, then Maria had just been called "mom" by Pepper.

He didn't know what they could have been talking about for her to feel this affectionate towards Maria already, but if he was being honest with himself, he hardly cared. "Mom", he repeated the word in his head, smiling. He'd missed this too - the obvious love the two most important women in his life shared for one another. Maybe, though, it had been nothing but a mistake. Maybe Pepper had never meant to say this, maybe she even regretted it.

"I… I mean…", she stumbled, her face flushed. "I shouldn't have…"

Tony almost felt like he should be saving her from the embarrassment she obviously felt, but then he watched his mother reach out to Pepper, and he stopped dead in his tracks once again.

"Don't be sorry, dear. No matter what will happen between you and Tony, you will always be a daughter to me. So it's only fair that you call me 'mom', isn't it?"

He smiled along with his mother, deciding to finally make his presence in the room known. With a loud thud he shut the front door, hoping they'd believe he had just now entered the house. Both women turned to face him, Pepper smiling shyly. She still took his breath away, he noticed, shaking his head quickly.

"Hello, girls.", he greeted them cheerfully, earning a laugh from his mother. "I come bearing food."

Pepper joined the laughter, feeling herself relax a little after the emotional moments with Maria. They sat down in the kitchen to eat, the conversation flowing surprisingly easy. Maria watched as her son wiped a drop of tomato sauce off of Pepper's lip, making her blush almost bashfully. She smiled to herself, when Tony tried Pepper's dish from her fork and she laughed out loud when he dropped half of it into his lap.

"Nothing about this is funny.", he grumbled, trying not to smile at Pepper's infectious giggle.

"Oh, but it is!", she snickered and he poked her side, leaving a small stain of sauce on her dress.

"Tony!", she shrieked and he laughed wholeheartedly. "Look what you did!"

"Did you just pout at me?", he smiled, tapping her bottom lip with his finger.

Maria watched the interaction between the two curiously, noticing how easily they seemed to be falling back into their old ways. Tony was still as affectionate with Pepper, maybe even more so now and even after all those years, it still puzzled her how he had changed so much ever since he'd known her. But it was Pepper's behavior that truly warmed Maria's heart. It seemed like being like this with Tony came almost naturally to her. She wouldn't have known, couldn't have remembered, but her gestures, her smiles, her laugh - all that was still the same when she was with him. Maybe, deep down, she could feel that he was indeed the one for her.

"I didn't pout.", Pepper whispered, blushing softly.

She'd probably blushed anyway, but having Maria - the mother of her lover - right there, obviously watching them interact with each other, made Pepper even more aware of the fact that she and Tony were being quite close, not just physically. Couple-like, almost, she couldn't help but think.

"You did, love.", he answered, his finger moving slowly over her bottom lip.

She got lost right there, in the depth of his brown eyes, in their warmth and sincerity, their love. Her eyes wandered between his and his soft lips. Those lips that she was still hesitant to kiss, even though she found herself longing for them often now, almost all the time, really.

"It's such a beautiful day…", Maria began suddenly, watching the both of them quickly pull away from the other. "I might just go and take a little stroll around the neighborhood."

Pepper studied her hands in her lap, knowing only too well what Tony's mother was trying to do. They'd lost themselves in each other for just a moment, but to Maria it must have seemed as if they needed their privacy.

"I can't have you walking around in this neighborhood all by yourself.", Tony told her, getting up along with his mother.

"Why not, darling. Is it not safe?", she teased.

"Not if the paparazzi spot you, which you know they will. You can enjoy the sun in the yard."

He looked at his mother, noticing her glancing to Pepper and quickly back to him. Her eyes pleaded with him silently and he suddenly understood why she was trying to get out of the house. Tony blushed, his soft smile reminding Maria of the days when he had still been a little boy, always smiling bashfully when she had discovered his secret plans (which included hacking some high-tech programs) . He couldn't quite decide whether it was a good or a bad thing that she knew him so well. Maybe, they had just been too obvious.

"Then again, I guess a little stroll won't hurt, huh?", he winked, trying to appear coy, when his heart was actually beating out of his chest.

"Exactly. I will probably be out for an hour...longer maybe."

"Be careful, mum.", Tony smiled.

She nodded her head, touching Pepper's shoulder briefly before heading towards the door. If Maria was being honest with herself, she felt almost too tired for a long walk, but she had witnessed the looks that had been exchanged between her son and Pepper and she wanted them to have a moment to themselves. As she reached the front door, Maria took a last glance at the couple, both already lost in the other once again. She left the house with a smile - and a heart that was heavy with motherly love for the two people she was leaving behind.

"She didn't leave because of us, did she?", Pepper asked as soon as the door had been closed.

"I'm pretty sure she did."

"Oh God…", she trailed off, dropping her head into her hands. "She must think I am crazy."

"She doesn't and you know that, love. Don't worry so much… mom knows what she is doing."

Pepper allowed his words to reassure her. Maybe, though, it was actually his warm hand on her back that gave her all the reassurance she needed. He'd done this a lot lately - touching her softly, rubbing her back, caressing her cheeks, kissing her fingers. He never went too far, never pressured her. But he was there, almost sensing when she needed him.

"We should try to get that sauce out of our clothes before it'll stain it for good.", Pepper told him, getting out of her chair.

Tony followed her over to the sink, where she wet a dish towel and began wiping the small spot of red sauce on her dress. When Pepper had cleaned the dress the best she could, she smoothed the material and turned to Tony, absentmindedly rubbing the wet towel over the much larger stain on his pants. His breath caught and he was almost tempted to stop her before it would get uncomfortable, but he couldn't quite do so just yet.

It took her a moment, but soon enough Pepper realized how high on his leg her hands were, how dangerously close to the place she'd rather not even think about now. She pulled her hand away quickly, her face a deep crimson color. Turning away from Tony, she pretended to be concentrated on cleaning the dish towel she had used. He was so close to her and she could feel him coming closer still. Tony's hands came down to rest on her waist and she dropped the towel, not even trying to pick it back up. Pepper felt his nose nuzzle her neck softly, his hot breath bouncing of her already sensitive skin. To her, his every touch was magic - a magic she couldn't escape. His lips felt soft and inviting when they came down upon the spot that made her shiver.

"Tony…", she whispered, supporting herself on the edge of the kitchen counter. "… your mom."

"Won't be back for another hour…", he breathed against her ear, spinning her body around slowly.

He knew that he was walking on thin ice. Ice so thin, that it could easily break and swallow them both in the progress. They had not been intimate again after their night together, maybe because she wouldn't have allowed it, maybe because he had been too afraid to try. Now, however, Tony was fighting a losing battle with his own body, with the longing he had for hers.

"She could come home early…", Pepper tried, a weak, half-hearted attempt to stop him.

She tilted her neck to its side when he trailed kisses along her jaw line, her hands finally falling to his chest. Tony pulled his lips away for her neck, hovering just above her lips.

"She won't…"

Then he kissed her. Deeply and full of love. Slowly and passionately. Pepper barely noticed her dress falling off her body, piling around her ankles. She hardly felt her own fingers move across the hem of his shirt, until she pulled it over his head. Her breath was already catching uncontrollably when Tony picked her up, placing her on the cold marble of the kitchen counter.

"Not here… Tony…", she begged, kissing him back feverishly.

"Right here.", he told her, stripping her of her panties. "Right now."

He loved her with a passion that was both unknown yet familiar to her. He moaned her name in a way that made her heart burst with joy and something else that she couldn't find a word for. Pepper let him do as he pleased. She let him love her in the middle of the afternoon, on the kitchen counter, knowing that his mom could very well walk in on them.

Yet, she didn't care. Just this one time, she would not hold back.

When he finally let go inside of her, his head falling to her shoulder, Pepper realized that she'd never felt anything like this. None of the men in her life that she could remember had made her feel anything that could even begin to compare to what she felt with Tony.

"I love you.", he breathed. "I love you."

Her legs around his waist assured that he wouldn't move away from her, yet she felt the urge to wrap her arms around him just as tightly. Pepper felt him soften deep within her, but she didn't allow him to pull away. He didn't try to. Instead, she found Tony's lips, kissing him the way he had kissed her earlier. This kiss was her way of telling him what she couldn't voice. Not yet at least, she hoped. This kiss was Pepper's way of saying that she, too, felt their love.

"Oh dear God."

Pepper pulled away from Tony just in time to see Maria turning on her heels, leaving the house as quickly as she had entered it. The door slammed behind her and Pepper's eyes fell to Tony's. For a moment he looked just as shocked as she did, then however her infectious laughter began to fill the room. They laughed together, at the absurdity of the situation, at the fact that Tony had just been caught by his mother. They laughed until tears ran down Pepper's cheeks.

They laughed until her heart was so light, that she could finally let the words fly through her lips.

"God, I love you, Tony."


	28. Chapter 28

**I must admit... this is one of my favorite chapters! I hope you guys love it as much as I do! Don't forget to review! **

They laughed until her heart was so light, that she could finally let the words fly through her lips.

"God, I love you, Tony."

The joyous laughter died as quickly as it had began, Pepper's eyes wide with a horror that pierced his heart painfully. She let her legs drop from their place around his waist and pushed against his chest gently, trying to move herself away from him. Tony watched her, startled and unable to move for a moment. But then he came to his senses, realizing that this might just be the moment to join them back or break them.

"What did you say?", he asked softly, but Pepper only shook her head, sniffling.

She tried again to get him away from her, to loosen his tight embrace around her body, but Tony wouldn't allow it.

"No.", he told her suddenly, his voice heavy with a new-found determination. "No, Pepper."

Tony brought her legs back around his waist and pulled her body against his own. She whimpered, her protest weak. The light of the arc reactor next to her face and he was touching her intimately once again, but Pepper didn't feel arousal or lust. She felt warmth and comfort, but couldn't allow herself to get lost in it. When he let go of her legs she didn't drop them again, maybe because she knew that she had nowhere else to go from here. Her choices were few, the price she'd pay - if she would make the wrong one - all too high.

He took her delicate face between his large hands, holding it carefully. He stared at her wordlessly until Pepper could bring herself to lift her gaze to his. Her eyes were full of unshed tears, but Tony had expected that. He was almost sure his eyes would be the same. Leaning even closer into her body, he kissed the corner of her mouth before placing his lips against her ear.

"What did you say, Pepper?"

"I can't…", she whispered, her head dropping yet again.

"Yes you can, love. Look at me."

Something within her made her obey and she found his eyes again. Those beautiful deep brown eyes that were now filled with tears that he was trying very hard to hold. His smile seemed almost odd to her, a mixture of expectations and sadness. Pepper took a deep breath, but after a moment she released it without having spoken.

"Tell me again what you said.", Tony whispered, wiping the first single tear off her cheek.

"I love you.", she breathed.

She let herself fall against his chest, her own body suddenly too heavy to sit upright. His hands came around her small frame immediately. Tony rubbed her back in slow, soothing motions, tucking her head safely into the crook of his neck. Then he picked her up, wordlessly carrying her upstairs. Pepper didn't protest, she didn't question. In their bedroom, Tony placed her onto the bed carefully and slid under the covers with her.

He didn't speak and didn't ask her to do so. But he held her, caressed her, kissed her and let a few of his tears leave his eyes. The way he'd only ever done with her.

"I'm so scared.", Pepper admitted softly and he sighed, readying himself for a conversation that was as important as it was dreaded.

"What are you so scared of, darling? Talk to me."

"I'm scared of falling into a bottomless nothing with nobody there to catch me. I am so afraid of losing what we have now, or of not being able to be what I used to be to you."

She was crying now, big, heavy tears that he would not even try to stop from falling.

"What if I will never, ever have another little memory of us? What if I'll do it all wrong and you'll realize I am no longer the person you once loved?"

"What if I will always be there to catch you? Every single time you fall?", Tony asked, cupping her face in his hand. "What if we'll make new memories, every day, while I will make sure you know about all the old ones?"

A small sob escaped Pepper's lips and she placed a trembling hand against the skin of his cheek. She could feel a soft stubble, knew that he had not shaved today.

"What if I love you even more now.", he added, his voice low. "What if I'd love you more than I ever thought to be possible?"

Pepper pressed her lips against his, knowing her tears would wet his cheeks. But he wouldn't care, he'd gladly take it. He had sounded so honest, so emotional and full of sincerity. In a way, Tony was not able to take all of her fears away. They sat too deep and she had spent too much time allowing them to be a part of her being. But Tony had reassured her, he had made her feel more at ease. She trusted him, truly and unconditionally and maybe that, and the love she felt for him, would be enough for her to let go.

She wanted his love, needed it. If he was willing to give her a spot in his heart and a place in his life, then Pepper would no longer push him away. Yes, she was afraid of falling. But she knew that falling wasn't painful if only you'd be caught in the end.

"I'm ready to fall.", she whispered against his lips and he released a shaky breath.

Tony was crying in silence now. It was scary to him too, after all. Tony had made a lot of promises to her - all of them honest and with the intention to be kept, but that didn't change the fact that he was worrying too. There were a lot of 'what ifs' for him too. He couldn't afford to break under the pressure, though, for he had promised to be her rock, her soft place to fall.

"When you were very early in your pregnancy, back when we didn't even know that we were expecting a baby, I had to catch you once. Literally."

"What?" , Pepper looked up at him, puzzled, her body still wrapped up in his arms.

"You fainted one day in the kitchen when we were making dinner together. I could see how you got very pale all of the sudden and then you just fell."

"And you caught me?", she asked, smiling.

"Well… yeah."

"My hero.", she giggled and he pinched her side lightly. "Is that the day we found out about the baby?"

"No, we didn't until the next week…", he trailed off, his eyes dreamy, almost distant.

Pepper recognized this look, the way his eyes changed slightly and how his whole expression was a little different in a matter of seconds. She liked to listen to him talk about the short time she was fortunate enough to carry a child - their baby. He wasn't hiding his obvious love for the little life they would never get to meet and Pepper enjoyed imagining him being an expecting daddy. It was always bittersweet - like most of her thoughts circling around the past.

"When did we realize that I was pregnant?", she asked, her eyes locked to his.

"A couple of days after you fainted you started getting sick, all the time, not only in the mornings. You hadn't allowed me to take you to a doctor when you fainted, telling me that it was just because of the heat. But when you weren't able to keep anything down, you made an appointment with your doctor, thinking that you must have caught the stomach flu."

"That's when we found out…"

"Yeah… I came to pick you up and you were trying to be all smiles, but as soon as you got into the car next to me, you just broke down."

Pepper considered his words for a moment, trying to decide why she would have broken down back then. Joy? Fear? Uncertainty of whether or not Tony would even want a child with her? Probably a bit of it all.

"How did you react?"

"I took you into my arms.", Tony sighed. "I was convinced that you must have been diagnosed with some horrible illness."

"But I wasn't…"

"No. Not at all. When you told me I almost passed out and then I spent the 20 minute drive back home calling everybody I could think of."

She placed her head on his chest, falling into a peaceful silence with him. His heartbeat was strong and soothing and his arms were her safe place to rest in. Pepper draped a leg over his waist, marveling at the sensation of his warm skin and the way it smelled of his cologne. She closed her eyes, because it felt like the most natural thing to be completely at ease in Tony's embrace.

"When we lay in bed that night…", he began, twirling a lock of her hair around his finger absent-mindedly, "… I caressed your bare belly for hours. I just couldn't believe…"

"…that she was in there - our love-baby.", she interrupted him, her voice a small whisper.

"You remember that?"

"I just had a little flash of it, Tony. You were stroking my tummy and… and kissing it.", her voice broke and he pulled her on top of him, wrapping her in his arms. "Then you said how you couldn't believe that our… our love-baby is in there."

"She was like a miracle to me, she still is.", Tony whispered against her already swollen lips before kissing them carefully again.

Pepper had never doubted that he must have loved their unborn child and she no longer doubted that he loved her too. He truly loved them both - the baby he had lost but not forgotten - and her - the woman he had almost lost because she had forgotten all too much. In so many, he must be the much stronger one out of the two of them, Pepper mused.

"I can do this.", she told him and Tony didn't quite know what she was talking about. "If you promise to be by my side, I can do this."

"Do what, Pepps?"

"I can start our life all over again. I can make you happy again, Tony. I promise I will try my best."

"Oh love…", he smiled at her, touching his forehead to hers. "Don't you think it already makes me the happiest man to have you with me? On top of me? Naked?"

She slapped his chest, poking her tongue out at him.

"Way to ruin my moment, idiot.", Pepper answered, trying to sound hurt, but failing as soon as the giggle escaped her lips.

"Wanna have another 'moment'?", he asked, his eyes full of mischief, his hands already on their slightly inappropriate path to the south end of her body.

Downstairs, Maria entered the house carefully, opening the door just a crack. She had seen too much already and didn't care to get an even better view. But she was tired, exhausted and not willing to walk another mile or two because of those two. The house was quiet and she found the kitchen empty, except for a pile of clothes that she did not want to take a closer look at. The Ironman boxers on the kitchen counter made her wonder if she was supposed to laugh or feel disturbed.

She was no longer young, but she remembered those days well, so she was not about to scold Tony and Pepper. She was happy for them, after all. Maria took the first couple of steps up to the guest bedroom when she heard them.

Sighing, she went back downstairs, turning the TV loud enough to drown out any background noises.

"They are going to kill each other one of these days…", she mumbled, plopping down on the couch, waiting for the moment she'd be able to walk through the house without having to listen to her son's sexual activities. "You would have had a field day with those two, Howard.", she added with a smile, looking up the ceiling briefly.


	29. Chapter 29

**Bad news guys! Well.. not really. I think Tears for Your Long Lost Boss is coming to an end. I know, I'm a horrible person but I just can't think of anything else to add. But not to worry! I'll be writing a new Pepperony FF immediately! So if you enjoyed this one, I guess you're going to enjoy the next one HAHAH! Thanks for all your support!**

Tony left her upstairs, making sure Pepper's sleeping form was covered with a soft blanket before he closed the door behind him. He leaned against its frame briefly, sighing happily. His heart felt full, almost ready to burst and the unbearable weight had finally left his shoulders. After all the battles he'd fought - some on his own, some with himself and some with her - Tony had finally reached the goal, his very own finish line.

He'd won her heart all over again. Now, all he could ever wish for was to keep her, in his life and in his heart. Forever.

It was dark outside now, almost nine o'clock at night and he wondered if he'd find his mum still awake. The lights were dimmed downstairs but he saw her silhouette sitting on the large couch, the TV flickering softly.

"What are you still doing down here, mom?", he asked, sitting himself next to her.

Maria looked at him with a smile. His hair was ruffled and he was wearing nothing but a pair of red shorts. But his eyes were sparkling and he was smiling his best million-dollar smile. Maybe she should have felt odd, knowing exactly what had put such a smile on his face, but her motherly heart was so full of pride and love, that no bad thought even crossed her mind.

"I wasn't planning on getting in your way again.", she laughed. "Once is enough for a day, for a lifetime actually. There are just some things a mother doesn't have to see."

"I'm really sorry about earlier…", Tony apologized, avoiding his mom's gaze.

Now, he wasn't her grown son, he wasn't the man that made his millions with witty comments and self-centered behavior on camera. He was her little boy, all bashful and innocent, clearly embarrassed with the tiny hint of a secret pride over what he'd done.

"It's okay, Tony. Nothing I have not seen before… or heard for that matter. I should have rang the doorbell.", she winked.

He chose not to answer, simply because there was no smart way to get himself out of this situation. They had been caught and he'd try to gracefully get over it now. Maria watched him bury his hand in the small pocket of his shorts, playing with an object that was invisible to her eyes. Tony was quiet, unusually lost in his own thoughts, a far-away look playing in his eyes now.

Finally, he pulled a small box out of his pocket and Maria needed nothing more than a quick glance to recognize what he was holding. After all, this tiny velvet box had been hers for decades. She said nothing as he turned and twisted it several times, until finally popping it open. The ring still made Maria's heart flutter, it still brought the image to her - the image of Howard on his knee, holding her hand and asking her to be his.

She had kept this ring when Tony had met Emma, one of his high school crushes. She had not given it to Tony when he'd been with any of his women. Just when she had decided that it would be hers forever, that she just couldn't bring herself to give it away, Pepper had come along. Sweet and bubbly, Tony's dearest friend and suddenly, his greatest love. It had been months since he had received the ring from his mother.

"This was going to be her wedding ring… until the accident."

Tony's mother placed a comforting hand on his knee, sighing. She hadn't known this and, frankly, she hadn't expected him to be so close to actually asking Pepper. Obviously, even months after her accident those thoughts had not left his mind.

"Why did you get it out again now?", Maria asked carefully.

"Because I still want to marry her. Mom… ", he said, looking at Maria intently. "… I need her to be my wife. She's it. She's my 'one'…"

"Then don't hesitate, Tony. Ask her!"

"How do I know she would even want to marry me? To me this might be a long relationship, but for Pepper it really just began a few hours ago."

"But she knows what you two had before her amnesia.", Maria reassured him. "And it seems to me that she wants to be with you."

He thought about his mother's words for a moment, knowing that she had a point. Pepper did know about their past, technically. But she didn't have the little memories that made it all so special.

"She told me that she loves me, mom.", he whispered. "Pepper wants us to have another chance."

"Then there is no reason for you to let it pass.", she told Tony, grabbing his hands. "Make her your wife, dear."

"What if she doesn't want to be my wife though? How do I know she won't tell me 'no'?"

"You don't know, Tony. You won't ever know unless you ask her. Do you know why you have this ring?"

He looked at his mother, his eyes full of questions.

"Do you know why my wedding ring is not on Emma's finger? Why it's not at home in my bedside table, hidden beneath the picture of your dad? I gave this ring to you because Pepper is the only one I could ever imagine on your side."

For a long moment, they were silent. The diamond sparkled softly in the dim lights of the living room and Tony could easily picture it on Pepper's slender finger. It would suit her well and it would always carry a lifetime full of meaning with it. He wanted what his parents had been lucky enough to share, even if their time together had been ended so painfully, too early.

"I want her to be my wife, mom."

"Then go for it, Tony. You got a second chance with her… you won't get a third one."

He nodded his head, looking at his mother. She was an incredible woman, with a wisdom that he admired. Her advices were usually right, they had proven to be his greatest help over the years and Tony knew that she was right yet again. Two chances with the woman he loved were probably already more than he ever deserved. Now it was his time to be courageous.

"Thank you, mommy.", he smiled, closing the velvet box carefully.

Taking his mother into a long hug, he tried to imagine Pepper's reaction when he'd ask her to marry him. Maybe, if he'd get so lucky just one more time, she would tell him 'yes'.

"What you two have is something that nothing can come between, I always believed that. This is no exception, Tony. You've gone through so much together in the past couple of months… most people don't have to deal with things like that in a lifetime."

They went upstairs together, Tony kissing his mother's cheek before she entered her bedroom and closed the door behind her, giving him an encouraging smile. He sighed, staring at his own bedroom door. Pepper was most likely still sleeping soundly and he didn't expect her to wake up before the next morning. Finally, he found the courage to walk into the master bedroom, holding his breath.

There she was, indeed asleep, not having moved at all since he had left her there. Her bare leg was sticking out from under the blanket and he admired her body, mentally ridding her of the blanket. Tony made his way to the bed quietly, the ring suddenly heavy in his pocket. Kneeling down by her bedside, he thought about all of the different ways he could propose to her.

He didn't want anything pompous, nothing that would seem over the top, even though he could undoubtedly afford the most candid of proposals. He didn't want her to feel like he didn't care about her family's approval, yet he'd rather be all alone with her when he would ask her. She deserved a wonderfully romantic set-up but he wasn't sure if he could go through all the preparations without losing his courage. Slowly, he pulled the ring out of his pocket yet again, this time opening the box right away. Pepper always looked peaceful when she slept, her natural beauty so obvious that it always made him ache to touch her. But this time he held back, not willing to risk waking her up. The engagement ring seemed sparkly even in the dark of the bedroom and Tony couldn't help but think how well it would match her eyes.

He wanted to ask her, he had no doubt about that now, but if he'd lose her over this, he would never be able to forgive himself. If Tony thought about all this rationally, then her denying his proposal seemed like the most likely thing to happen. Wouldn't it only be logical that Pepper would not want to marry a man she had just now fallen in love with?

Yet somehow, those thoughts did not make him falter in his determination. He was on a mission now, and come what may, he would not let himself get scared.

"You're a bloody mind sucker, love.", he whispered, pushing her hair out of her face.

He had always loved to rest his hand there, against her face, so he could stroke the soft skin of her cheek. She had the tiniest lines around her eyes and her eyelashes were long as they fluttered softly against her skin. Pepper let out a long, deep sigh and Tony felt the urge to pull his hand away and pray she wasn't waking up. When she didn't move again, Tony kept his hand in place, resuming the careful motion of his finger against her skin.

"Why are you awake?", she mumbled and he froze, his hand stilling together with his breath.

Her eyes were still closed, but he was too afraid to move the ring away, afraid she'd suddenly open her eyes and see the velvet box.

"I… I was just checking on mom.", he explained. "Go back to sleep, darling."

"Come back to bed…"

Tony carefully pulled his hand away from her face, ready to get up and crawl into bed with her again. She smiled, opening her eyes to be able to watch him join her under their covers. Almost as if she were moving in slow motion, her eyes fell to the small object in his other hand, resting right in front of her on the bed. Her smiled faded and Tony felt his heart drop. She stared at the diamond ring long and hard, then lifted her eyes to meet his. They were soft and begging, almost desperate now and Pepper brought her hand up to cover her mouth, shaking her head softly. Tears pooled in her own eyes, brimming on the edge, ready to spill over any moment.

It couldn't possibly be a good sign that she was already crying, shaking her head as a trembling hand covered her mouth. But he wouldn't turn back now, not that there was even any sense in denying the purpose of this ring. 'I can do this', he thought, remembering Pepper's words from earlier. 'If you promise to be by my side, I can do this.'

Would she really still want to be by his side after this?

"Marry me, Pepper.", he whispered, watching the first tears run down her cheeks.


	30. Chapter 30

**Last chapter! I'm thinking about writing a second part for thins one. I think I will. Love you guys! You have been amazing!**

"Marry me.", he said again, suddenly shaken by an unknown fear. Fear of losing her right there. "Be my wife, Pepper. Please be my wife."

Her eyes darted from the ring back to his, only to fall back to the sparkling diamond once again. She had lived a moment like this twice before, yet nothing about it came even close to her feelings and emotions she'd had then. With her heart beating so mercilessly fast, Pepper could hardly breathe. And the way he looked at her, did not do anything to calm her.

She'd never seen him display so many emotions, so openly and unmasked. She saw his fear and nervousness, almost to the point of panic. She saw the glistening in his eyes, telling her his tears were not far. There was the love he had for her and the pain and doubt that was washing over him in big, dangerous waves. She could see a pleading in his eyes, an overwhelming vulnerability. Pepper was taking too long to answer, she knew this, but her voice was failing her and the words got stuck somewhere deep in her throat.

"Pepper…", he whispered again.

This time around, his voice was heavy with regret and defeat. He cast his eyes down, slowly moving his fingers over the lid of the velvet box, ready to close it again. He'd shut it now and never open it again. He'd do the very same thing to his heart as well.

He felt her hand grab his just before he could find the courage to snap the small jewelry box shut. Pepper laced her fingers through his and he looked up to find her eyes. She placed her hand on his cheek and he could feel her finger tips, still wet and warm from her own tears. They stared at each other intently, Pepper still crying silently.

Then, slowly, barely noticeable at first, she began nodding her head. Tony watched, mesmerized, trying to progress the meaning of this, afraid to allow himself to misinterpret her intentions. He brought his own hand up to cover hers, pressing it tightly against his cheek, so she wouldn't pull it away. Tony could see her mouth open slightly, as if she was readying herself to speak. He held his breath and then suddenly, he could hear it. A single word, spoken so quietly that it was almost impossible to hear it. But he did. He heard it, saw it, felt it.

And she said it again, clearer this time, more certain. "Yes.", she breathed, before her forehead fell to his, big tears falling to her cheeks and his.

Tony kissed her, with passion and relief, love and adoration. His kisses were heavy with an unspoken promise, the promise of a future together. Finally, she pulled him onto the bed and into her body, embracing him. After a long moment, Tony pulled away, smiling at her tear-stained, glowing face. He took Pepper's hand into his and she watched him as he pulled the ring out of its box. Staring into her eyes, he slowly placed it on her finger, pushing it down until it was in place. It fit just right, lighting up her whole being.

"I'll be your wife.", Pepper whispered, turning her finger to watch the ring sparkle softly.

He joined her under the covers, silently admiring her. Somehow, she looked different now, glowing and genuinely content. She had snuggled into his arms with her head resting on his chest and he brought his hand down on her lower back protectively. Pepper held her hand up, fascinated by the piece of jewelry that was so new, yet seemed perfectly familiar already.

"It's my mom's engagement ring.", he explained, caressing her bare skin lazily.

"It's so beautiful, Tony.", Pepper told him, choking up as she spoke the words. "Did she give it to you today?"

"No.", he smiled and she took her eyes off the ring to look at him. "She gave it to me months ago and I kept it right there, in my was supposed to be your wedding ring. But with the accident, we never got to…"

"Why now?", Pepper asked quietly, squeezing his hand under their blankets.

"Because I can't risk losing another chance to ask you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Pepper and I realized I won't get another chance with you. It's now or never and I simply cannot be without you."

"I want to spend my life with you too.", she smiled, letting him wipe her tears.

"Good, because you are stuck with me now, love."

Pepper giggled, kissing his lips quickly. He nuzzled her cheek before getting comfortable with her in his arms. They were silent for a long time and he assumed that she must have fallen asleep. Her breaths were even and calm and she felt warm and comforting against him. Tony was drawing invisible circles on the soft skin of her waist and he felt himself drift into the blissful state between consciousness and sleep.

"Can we tell everybody tomorrow?", she asked suddenly, startling him.

"Are you ready for this? It's going to be a chaos once this hit's the tabloids, Pepper."

"I know but I don't even mind. I'd like for our families to know right away and then we just take it from there."

"That sounds like a wonderful idea, love.", he told her. "Even though, mom might already have a feeling that we are engaged. Again."

"Really? Why?"

"I talked to her earlier and told her that I want you to be my wife."

She smiled, enjoying the sound of the word 'wife' falling from his lips so easily. She hadn't thought she would ever be a wife and until today she hadn't even realized that she would want to be one. Tony had given her trust - in him, but also in herself and the fact that she could do this, that she did deserve her very own happily ever after.

"I want to be your wife.", she smiled dreamily.

"You'll be my ."

"Oddly enough, this sounds just perfect to me.", she giggled, kissing him again, before they finally allowed themselves to fall asleep, peacefully.

When Pepper woke up again, the room was lit up by the bright sunshine, making her groan before she could reach for her pillow to pull it over her head. She moved her hand over the bed, trying to find Tony and when she couldn't seem to get her hands on him she peeked out from under the pillow. The bed was empty and the alarm clock showed 9:57am - unusually late for her. She wrapped her blanket around her still naked body and was about to get out of bed when Tony opened the door, walking into the room. Pepper watched him shut the door quickly before making his way over to her.

"Good morning.", he smirked, ridding her of the blanket as soon as he was close enough.

"Tony!", she screeched, unsuccessfully trying to cover herself from his piercing gaze.

He gave her butt a tight squeeze before he pulled her naked body against his own, wishing he would not have gotten dressed just yet.

"Not in the morning…", she mumbled and he laughed, wholeheartedly.

"I would disagree but you are right.", he answered and Pepper studied his face, questioningly. "Get dressed, I have a little surprise for you."

Pepper smiled brightly, untangling herself from his embrace, walking off into the bathroom. She was excited, her current state of clothing, or the lack thereof - completely forgotten. Tony enjoyed the view before she disappeared behind the door. He went to sit down on the edge of the bed, sighing contently. He was a happy man today, very much so. All he could hope for now, was that Pepper would appreciate and enjoy the little surprise he had waiting for her. He could feel the nervousness spreading within him with a strange tingle, consuming his body from head to toes.

"Ready!", she exclaimed a few minutes later, emerging from the bathroom after having dressed in jeans and a ,cute pink shirt, her hair framing her face in soft waves.

"Come on then.", he smiled, leading her out the door.

"What's the surprise?", Pepper asked, before they had even reached the staircase.

"You'll see in just a moment.", he smiled, taking a deep breath as they began to walk down the steps.

Soon enough, she could hear familiar voices and when the people that she had recognized and some that she hadn't heard, came into view, Pepper stopped, looking up at him.

"Are you sure?"

"You said you'd like to tell everyone, love."

She smiled brightly, grabbing his hand to walk the last steps with him. Her heart warmed instantly as she watched her parents chat happily with Tony's mother and only then did she realize that they must have met quite a few times by now. The thought of them getting along so well, made her smile. Her nephews were there together with their mom and all together, they looked like the family they were about to become.

"Oh, good morning princess!", she heard her dad's voice.

"Hello daddy."

She didn't walk over to properly greet them all, instead, Pepper stayed by Tony's side, clutching his hand. His felt slightly sweaty, while hers were horribly cold. They were both nervous, yet neither seemed to be able to stop smiling.

"Thank you all for coming over so early. It's just that Pepper here… well… she just couldn't wait to share the news."

"Tony!", she giggled, nudging his side.

Her face was flushed almost instantly and having all eyes on her didn't help all too much.

"What's the news, sis?", Sarah asked impatiently.

Pepper looked up at her fiancée, her eyes sparkling with excitement. Silently, she asked him for permission to break the news to the people they loved the most and he nodded his head, placing his hand against her cheek briefly. She turned back to face her family, her eyes glistening with a faint hint of tears.

"Tony asked me to be his wife.", she smiled, holding up a shaky hand to show her gorgeous engagement ring.  
For a good twenty minutes, everything became a blur. A wonderfully emotional blur of happiness, tears, laughter and hugs. There was Janela, who had silently lived with the fear that her youngest child would end up alone, lonely. There was Harry, who just wanted his princess to be happy. And there was Maria, who'd always loved Tony, her only son, with her whole heart.

"Are you okay, love?", Tony asked his wife-to-be when he found her in the kitchen, watching the rest of the family from afar.

She had needed just a moment to herself, but as soon as his hand had wrapped around her waist, Pepper had known that she really needed a moment alone with him. She leaned back into his embrace and relaxed, sighing.

"I am. I'm happy, Tony."

"Not as much as I am.", he smiled, kissing her neck.

They both watched the excited chatter between their mothers, most likely planning the wedding already.

"Do you think we'll ever be able to give them a grandchild?", she whispered suddenly, throwing him off for just a moment.

"I truly believe that we will have a beautiful family together.", Tony finally answered, pulling her closer still.

Pepper allowed herself to get lost in the dream of a beautiful wedding, a loving marriage and - someday - her own little family. She had not forgotten how to dream. She had just pushed it all aside when her world and fallen apart. Pepper had not forgotten how to love, how to love him completely. And he had kept his promise all along.

Together, they held the future in their hands, while they carried the past along with them. Together, they'd make a lifetime of memories.

Come what may.

**Don't forget to review! **


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